If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
Anonymous
Related
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button.
SAM LEVENSON The elevator can take you up to greater heights ONLY IF you take positive action by pressing the but...
OLAWALE DANIEL How do you think we smart we realy are?
If the whole world, economic, and everything around us,...
VICDO If it keeps up, man will atrophy all his limbs but the push-button finger.
FRANK LLOYD WRIGHT It's supposed to be automatic, but actually you have to push this button.
JOHN BRUNNER You push the button, we do the rest.
GEORGE EASTMAN Don't push the button. The button is bad.
DAVID KELLEY Television is like the American toaster, you push the button and the same thing pops up everytime.
ALFRED HITCHCOCK Push the 87 (octane button), it'll give you nothing.
DAVID MEREDITH If you can't make the image bigger or more important than what you see, then don't push the button
RUTH BERNHARD The average person pushes an elevator button 6 or 7 minutes before realizing it's not working. I...
DON RICKLES It doesn't seem to me you can push the pause button on terror.
DAVID WELCH Swimming a 50 m is like playing the pokies: you push a button, and you never know what is going come...
CATE CAMPBELL There is no button that you push and the next day you become independent.
CARLES PUIGDEMONT It's a long story. Want a refill?"
"No, let's start the steak. Where's the button?"
"Right...
ROBERT A. HEINLEIN Everything seems OK (in the clubhouse). We're not going to push the panic button.
CRAIG WILSON If you want to make an audience laugh, you dress a man up like an old lady and push her down the sta...
TINA FEY Sure, the plan could push Treasury yields up. But if it contributes to an increased efficiency of th...
BILL STERLING Jeez, someone needs to push the reset button on this planet.
LIBBA BRAY (to Foaly) Captain Short's life is in danger, so push the button before I climb that tower and push ...
EOIN COLFER Be sure to do all the things you want to do before you die ...because you could die in the next minu...
LORRIN L. LEE I don't think he is going to push the nuclear weapon button.
BRAD RUBIN I didn't expect the race to go like that, and I didn't think I'd forget to push the pit lane speed b...
DAN WHELDON She's got a big button let's push hers!
PINK She's got a big button — let's push hers!
PINK That's the secret. If you always make sure you're exactly the person you hoped to be, if you always ...
CAROL RIFKA BRUNT The shelters will have push-button, on-demand heating. On cold winter days, customers will be able t...
DAN STESSEL It's so weird man, it's like the vagina is an elevator door that opens up into this dimension, and s...
DUNCAN TRUSSELL (THE JOE ROGAN EXPERIENCE, EPISODE 179) Reach out and help others. If you have the power to make someone happy, do it. Be a vessel, be the c...
GERMANY KENT The push button wall plates are still there. They are copper and have the black and white push butto...
BILL CLARKE Ben Caxton, I will lie right here in the grass and starve before I will get up to push a button that...
ROBERT A. HEINLEIN It is going to give access to immediate availability for everything that is configured on the Intern...
ANSSI VANJOKI Sure, some journalists use anonymous sources just because they're lazy and I think editors ought...
BEN BRADLEE And sure, I know if you eat this way you'll die. So? If you don't eat this way you're still going to...
ROBERT FULGHUM Life is like an elevator. On your way up, sometimes you have to stop and let some people off.
ZIAD K. ABDELNOUR You are in 'real love' if you are 100 percent sure you will die for it.
EPHDAN It's not time to push the panic button. We just need to play the full 60 minutes.
MATT BRADLEY I didn't mean to push all your buttons, I was just looking for the mute button.
ANONYMOUS The push-button looks consistent with a lot of the ones we've seen lately.
CAMERON CHEN It's the push of a button. It would have made a world of difference.
HOLLY WARD Those who think in Britain they can push the Brexit button and not have a bill to pay are seriously ...
CHARLES MICHEL With a push of a button, you can take what you've recorded on the phone and wirelessly send it to yo...
ANDY GRAHAM All we have to do is start the engine, push a button, and the chains fall into police.
CHARLIE BARKER Baseball is a craft and you have to work at it, you can't just push the button and be ready to go. T...
DAVE PLOOF The players are determined and they're finding ways to win. They push toward it without pushing the ...
DAVE TIPPETT Never take an elevator in city hall.
HARVEY MILK You can push someone’s button over and over again to get what you want, but there comes a point wh...
ALEXANDRA BRACKEN We must not push the panic button, but we must engage in a persistent and consistent effort to prepa...
DAVID WU With Facebook, you're not really allowed to be unhappy. Think about it: There's only a like ...
YISHAN WONG The fact of the matter is, if you want to be anonymous, you're still better off at the peep show,
PENN JILLETTE We don't swim for the attention. We don't swim to be rock stars. There is something beautifu...
AARON PEIRSOL I'm not affiliated with either Wikileaks or Anonymous - of course, it's not like I would tel...
JONATHAN NOLAN Be kind. We never know what people are going through. Give grace and mercy because one day your circ...
GERMANY KENT The challenge for me as an actor is if you become a celebrity, you don't meet strangers anymore....
MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY I was 24 yesterday. Suddenly you wake up, and you get on the elevator, and there's a mirror ther...
CHARLES NELSON REILLY You can either use the elevator for the loft or the ranch but not both. If it went to both units, th...
STEVEN SCHNEEMANN I wish we could push a button and find a way to engage the private sector and make this free.
JAMES WILLIAMS I'm sure other special prosecutors have felt frustrated, but the general norm has been that if there...
KEN GORMLEY Kindness is universal. Sometimes being kind allows others to see the goodness in humanity through yo...
GERMANY KENT I believe that if you want to be president of the United States, you run for president. You don'...
MARCO RUBIO Yes, I can seem to be a little “ant” who’s just not silent…but I hope that some “important...
SVETLANA SHCHEDRINA | LUCKYOPTIMIST We've got a plan in place to make sure everyone is ready. If it does snow, we'll be able to remove i...
AL FIELDS Where do you think I'd be next week if I didn't know how to shout and holler and make the public tak...
MUHAMMAD ALI Once you have missed the first buttonhole you'll never manage to button up
JOHANN WOLFGANG VON GOETHE When you write a program for Android, you use the Oracle Java tools for everything, and at the very ...
LARRY ELLISON I push this one button and the shower goes on and I think, where the f*ck am I?
OZZY OZBOURNE Girls are like phones. We love to be held and talked to, but if you press the wrong button you'll b...
ALBERT EINSTEIN Drone attacks subvert the rule of law - we become judge, jury, and executioner - at the push of a bu...
MARK MCKINNON If all the chemicals in secondhand smoke were bottled up and sprayed in somebody's face, I'm sure th...
DEBORAH CONRAD I cannot switch my voice. My voice is not like an elevator going up and down.
MARIA CALLAS Were you there?”
She shook her head. “No. I was here in Nain having a
child.”
�...
FRANCINE RIVERS If you push anyone to fall, you will be pushed before you fall.
VIKRANT PARSAI When I'm doing a book tour in the States, I'll wake up in the room sometimes in an anonymous...
ANTHONY BOURDAIN If I have to move up in a building, I choose the elevator over the escalator. Because one time I was...
DEMETRI MARTIN I think if you have a two-story office and you hire someone who's handicapped, it might be reaso...
RAND PAUL We want the third quarter to be our best push. I'm not sure what happened.
ALICIA WRIGHT If you can read this, thank a teacher. -Anonymous teacher.
ANONYMOUS TEACHER If you die of pneumonia,I'm pretty sure there are at least a dozen guys who'll try to kill me and ma...
ALLY CARTER Be the girl you want your daughter to be. Be the girl you want your son to date. Be classy, be smart...
GERMANY KENT Wake every morning with the same feeling. Live up high and fly on top of the ceiling. I just know th...
ANA CLAUDIA ANTUNES Instead of being push-button, it's a touch sensor and is activated with a touch of your finger.
CARRIE SMITH My little self-analysis is that consumer technology is the closest thing we have to magic. You push ...
DAVID POGUE If you are going to walk on thin ice, you might as well dance! -Anonymous.
ANONYMOUS Lousy capitalists! No picture! Capitalists! No one here to take my picture. All capitalists lousy bu...
GIUSEPPE ZANGARA Toil, feel, think, hope; you will be sure to dream enough before you die, without arranging for it.
JOHN STERLING Toil, feel, think, hope; you will be sure to dream enough before you die, without arranging for it
JOHN STERLING Entrepreneur, if you're going to start up, make sure you start up with excellence in mind
ONYI ANYADO So if you want to make sure, you can be sure that I understand what these proceeding [sic] can end u...
ZACARIAS MOUSSAOUI You grow up and dream about playing for your country. You could get injured getting off an elevator....
ANDERSON VAREJAO If when you die your life flashes before your eyes make sure you would smile while watching it.
MACEY LADYGA Mes poumons sont remplis de l'air pur
mon esprit est ouvert et libéré, la sérénité remplit tous...
JACOB MAHURIEN Never hold anyone by the button or the hand in order to be heard out; for if people are unwilling to...
LORD CHESTERFIELD I'd made sure I knew his name. You shouldn't ask people to die for you if you don't at least know th...
LAURELL K. HAMILTON Hollywood is fickle; your career can end pretty fast. If the acting jobs dry up, you have to have so...
MATTHEW LAWRENCE We're working in the dark; we don't have an inventory list. We had an elevator guy standing waist-de...
JOHN CLEMENTS If die I must, let me die drinking in an Inn.
WALTER MAP If die I must, let me die drinking in an Inn
WALTER MAP I'm not really looking forward to taking the elevator up to the sixth floor.
BARBARAH RODRIGUEZ You have an icon ready to back you, anytime anywhere. All you have to do is press the play button...
SHANE J VAN DER VELDE Even if one is thinking about elevator music, or Weather Channel music, there isn't any necessity fo...
BOB JAMES
More Anonymous
Animals are human just like us in a different shape and form so do not abuse them.
ANONYMOUS ANONYMOUS You don't have to touch someone to love them, It's not in the kiss, It's in the times you don't kiss...
ANONYMOUS ANONYMOUS Glory be to Him who changes others and remains Himself unchanged!
ANONYMOUS Beloved, let us love one another, because love is from God; everyone one who loves is born of God an...
ANONYMOUS May the God who gives endurance and encouragement
give you a spirit of unity among yourselves ...
ANONYMOUS Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon them.
ANONYMOUS Epperson's law: When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can be...
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like what y...
ANONYMOUS Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
ANONYMOUS Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
ANONYMOUS It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
ANONYMOUS He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.
ANONYMOUS All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
ANONYMOUS A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do yo...
ANONYMOUS A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
ANONYMOUS Marital Freedom: The liberty that allows a husband to do exactly that which his wife pleases.
ANONYMOUS Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...b...
ANONYMOUS Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her o...
ANONYMOUS Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's family d...
ANONYMOUS The most expensive wedding usually ends with the quickest divorce.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
ANONYMOUS Leadership is the ability to hide your panic from others.
ANONYMOUS An expert knows all the answers -- if you ask the right questions.
ANONYMOUS Time cuts down all, Both great and small.
ANONYMOUS Few cases of eyestrain have been developed by looking on the bright side of things.
ANONYMOUS Be an optimist -- at least until they start moving animals in pairs to Cape Canaveral.
ANONYMOUS Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell. •Anonymous Many an o...
ANONYMOUS Some of the smallest situations are the biggest to some people.
ANONYMOUS Man endures pain as an undeserved punishment; woman accepts it as a natural heritage.
ANONYMOUS Defeat may test you; it need not stop you. If at first you don't succeed, try another way. For eve...
ANONYMOUS Anarchy - it's not the law, it's just a good idea.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
ANONYMOUS A friend is one to whom you can pour out the contents of your heart, chaff and grain alike. Knowin...
ANONYMOUS Friendship is a living thing that lasts only as long as it is nourished with kindness, empathy and u...
ANONYMOUS She is clothed in strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.
ANONYMOUS many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. charm is deceptive, beauty is fleeting; but a ...
ANONYMOUS Lady Wisdom will be your close friend; and Brother Knowledge will be your pleasant companion.
ANONYMOUS When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.
ANONYMOUS It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is possible only when one is busy. The body must toil, the mind must be occupied, and the ...
ANONYMOUS Happiness is like jam. You can't spread even a little without getting some on yourself.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is the overcoming of not unknown obstacles toward a known goal.
ANONYMOUS Happiness seems to be the result of something happening — inactivity is not very exhilarating.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not pleasure, it's victory.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is the art of never holding in your mind the memory of any unpleasant thing that has passe...
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not given but exchanged.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly possessions. It's a mental attitude. It comes f...
ANONYMOUS If happiness could be brought, few of us could pay the price.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is like a butterfly. The more you chase it, the more it eludes you. But if you turn your a...
ANONYMOUS So live that your memories will be part of your happiness.
ANONYMOUS Happiness consists in activity; such as the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and ...
ANONYMOUS Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not always measured in smiles.
ANONYMOUS Happiness lies in our own backyard, but it's probably well hidden by crabgrass.
ANONYMOUS Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
ANONYMOUS The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
ANONYMOUS Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle ...
ANONYMOUS Faith is like electricity. You can't see it, but you can see the light.
ANONYMOUS To reprove small faults within due vehemence, is as absurd as if a man should take a great hammer to...
ANONYMOUS My friend, why have you drifted so far away? All motion is relative, maybe it is you who have moved ...
ANONYMOUS The happiest business in all the world is that of making friends, And no investment on the street pa...
ANONYMOUS Flattery looks like friendship, just like a wolf looks like a dog.
ANONYMOUS Remember that the faith that moves mountains always carries a pick.
ANONYMOUS When you laugh, be sure to laugh at what people do and not at what people are.
ANONYMOUS The sound of a kiss is much softer than that of a cannon - but it's echo lasts a great deal longer.
ANONYMOUS Religion is like a blind man looking in a black room for a black cat that isn't there, and finding i...
ANONYMOUS A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
ANONYMOUS When life throws a lemon at you, you throw it straight back at life and miss completely. That's my l...
ANONYMOUS Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.
ANONYMOUS Aging is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
ANONYMOUS I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, ...
ANONYMOUS تبسمك في وجه أخيك صدقة، وأمرك بالمعروف صدقة ونهيك عن ال...
ANONYMOUS The first men to be created and formed were called the Sorcerer of Fatal Laughter, the Sorcerer of N...
ANONYMOUS Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you...
ANONYMOUS And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
ANONYMOUS Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for ...
ANONYMOUS Anyone who is having troubles should pray. Anyone who is happy should sing praises. Anyone who is si...
ANONYMOUS I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.
ANONYMOUS Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us.
ANONYMOUS Store front sign: Entire store on sale, everything $1 or more.
ANONYMOUS If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives.
ANONYMOUS Why didn't Bruce Willis play the lead role in Titanic? He would have saved everyone.
ANONYMOUS I'm looking to buy a new boomerang, how can I throw the old one out?
ANONYMOUS My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!
ANONYMOUS If you can't find your better half, try finding your better two quarters.
ANONYMOUS Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it.
ANONYMOUS It's easy to stop smoking. I stopped smoking today with no problems. I also stopped yesterday too,...
ANONYMOUS One day my wife's credit card got stolen.. what a relief it was to find that the thief spends less t...
ANONYMOUS The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.
ANONYMOUS In my house dirty dishes are like rabbits, they keep multiplying.
ANONYMOUS How do you get a Kleenex to dance?
Put a little boogy in it!
ANONYMOUS For you, I would swim across the ocean. LOL, just kidding, there are sharks in there.
ANONYMOUS Why does Chuck Norris' calendar go directly from March 31 to April 2nd? Nobody fools Chuck Norris!
ANONYMOUS I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.
ANONYMOUS Stop the earth from spinning, I want to get off!
ANONYMOUS If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter.
ANONYMOUS The last thing that blew my mind was the wind.
ANONYMOUS Why do you always see lightning first and hear the thunder later? Because your eyes are in front of...
ANONYMOUS Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I ...
ANONYMOUS Stupidity is far more fascinating than intelligence, after all intelligence has it's limits.
ANONYMOUS Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on a beach drinking margaritas.
ANONYMOUS My kitchen cleaner says "for a clean kitchen" so I can't use it, mine is dirty.
ANONYMOUS Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
ANONYMOUS Everything happening now happens because of everything that has happened before.
ANONYMOUS When there's a will, I want to be in it.
ANONYMOUS Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
ANONYMOUS When is the longer way always better than the shorter one? When you're a taxi driver.
ANONYMOUS As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible.
ANONYMOUS When the cop told me to give him my first name and last name I told him, 'Are you crazy? What's my ...
ANONYMOUS Always be yourself, unless you can be a unicorn. Then always be a unicorn.
ANONYMOUS What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.
ANONYMOUS I'm going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, I'm outstanding.
ANONYMOUS Oh I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
ANONYMOUS I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.
ANONYMOUS Think you're smart? Come over and help me with my homework.
ANONYMOUS Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it.
ANONYMOUS Newspaper Ad: Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!!
ANONYMOUS I bet you anything that I can stop gambling right now.
ANONYMOUS My doctor prescribed laughter as the most efficient medicine. Unfortunately the pharmacist said too ...
ANONYMOUS Finding a treasure is like working on algebra equations, all you have to do is find the X.
ANONYMOUS I'm trying to think how I can think of what I want to think.
ANONYMOUS People think.....
I'm skinny, but I'm really chunky.
I'm cheap, but I'm really thrifty. ANONYMOUS I looked into my wallet and it was empty, I looked through all my pockets and they were all empty. T...
ANONYMOUS I lost control. Offering reward to anyone who finds it.
ANONYMOUS Chuck Norris is so amazing he can:
Light ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.<...
ANONYMOUS Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time a...
ANONYMOUS He grabbed her hand and held it tightly, and she thought, "he loves me!" And he thought, "wow this ...
ANONYMOUS I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition.
ANONYMOUS I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.
ANONYMOUS Stop! You're under arrest for being too sexy. Your sentence is an eternity inside my heart.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurrasic Park.
ANONYMOUS It's 11PM, do you know where your pants are?
ANONYMOUS Son, employees are like mules. Some you stand in front of and coax them along with a carrot. Some yo...
ANONYMOUS Don't believe everything fortune cookies tells you. Just because they're sweet doesn't mean they're...
ANONYMOUS Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!
ANONYMOUS I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake.
ANONYMOUS How do I like my eggs? In a cake.
ANONYMOUS My grandpa's car is so old; when he parked in front of a museum, they towed his car inside the museu...
ANONYMOUS Birthdays are nature's way of feeding us cake.
ANONYMOUS What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?
ANONYMOUS I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.
ANONYMOUS There was a robot invented in China that catches thieves. In Australia it caught 10 thieves, in Ame...
ANONYMOUS I'm a Victoria's Secret model. It's such a secret, not even Victoria knows.
ANONYMOUS How is a poor man a lot like a rich man? They both have an iPhone.
ANONYMOUS Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong.
ANONYMOUS Smile while you still have teeth.
ANONYMOUS Have some patience, I'm screwing things up as fast as possible.
ANONYMOUS After many years of studying my Geography book I finally know by heart that Australia is on page 23.
ANONYMOUS Funny sign at health spa: Fresh 10,000 year old mud for sale.
ANONYMOUS I always mean what I say, I don't always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.
ANONYMOUS I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable.
ANONYMOUS True love is truly amazing only when it's truly true.
ANONYMOUS Being married means mostly shouting "What?" from other rooms.
ANONYMOUS Is it good if a blow dryer blows?
ANONYMOUS Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
ANONYMOUS Never test how deep the water is with both feet.
ANONYMOUS Never judge a book by it's movie
ANONYMOUS I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side, my legs for always supporting me, and my ...
ANONYMOUS When you have a hammer in your hand everything around you starts looking like a nail.
ANONYMOUS Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring so I go back to being myself.
ANONYMOUS If you didn't see it with your own eyes, or hear it with your own ears, don't invent it with your sm...
ANONYMOUS My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do.
ANONYMOUS I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better.
ANONYMOUS Officer: I had a feeling I'd catch someone speeding here. Driver: I know, that's why I came as fast...
ANONYMOUS I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close ...
ANONYMOUS Today I saw something through a store window that was truly stunning, beautiful and sexy. I wanted ...
ANONYMOUS Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon.
ANONYMOUS Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.
ANONYMOUS I'm not really a control freak, but... can I show the right way to do that?
ANONYMOUS A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
ANONYMOUS I once finished first on my running team, then the coach asked me where everyone else is.
ANONYMOUS Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.
ANONYMOUS Why is the sky blue? Sure there is an explanation, but lets just be thankful it's not red!
ANONYMOUS Just because I can't sing doesn't mean that I won't sing.
ANONYMOUS Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place... the fridge.
ANONYMOUS I'm not frowning, I'm just smiling upside down.
ANONYMOUS The only problem with golf is that the slow people are always in front of you and the fast people al...
ANONYMOUS I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom.
ANONYMOUS The amount of time it takes for a minute to go by is proportionally dependent with the distance to t...
ANONYMOUS Bathroom sign above toilet: It's like basketball, the basket is bigger than the ball! Learn to sco...
ANONYMOUS I can't wait for that to never happen.
ANONYMOUS I liked the movie Titanic, my favorite character was the iceberg.
ANONYMOUS Sports top moment: to score a goal but miss in the re-play.
ANONYMOUS Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light.
ANONYMOUS Rudeness top moment: to scare an ostrich on an asphalt street.
ANONYMOUS I'm so sorry about what I said when I was hungry.
ANONYMOUS Always be positive. *Trips down the stairs* Whew, I got down those stairs fast.
ANONYMOUS Beauty is mysterious as well as terrible.
ANONYMOUS An expert is a person who has made every possible mistake in a small field of study.
ANONYMOUS My taste in music ranges from "You've gotta listen to this" to "I know, please don't judge me."
ANONYMOUS Just because it's called makeup, it doesn't mean it should make up 100% of your face.
ANONYMOUS You can't please everyone, you're not a Nutella jar.
ANONYMOUS Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.
ANONYMOUS It's better to shut up and give the impression that you're stupid than to say something and erase al...
ANONYMOUS If we ever travel far in the universe to another planet with intelligent life, let's just make patte...
ANONYMOUS Whenever you feel stupid, remember that there are people outside searching for Pokemon.
ANONYMOUS