With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law; and every time they make a law it's a joke.
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With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law, and every time they make a law it's a joke.
WILL ROGERS And the thing about my jokes is, they don't hurt anybody. You can take 'em or leave 'em - you can sa...
WILL ROGERS Every new time will give its law.
MAXIM GORKY By the side of the everlasting Why there is a Yes--a transitory Yes if you like, but a Yes.
E.M. FORSTER Never forget that you are one of a kind. Never forget that if there weren't any need for you in all ...
R. BUCKMINSTER FULLER Oh, it makes a difference, I thought. And if it doesn't make a difference you will make it make a di...
CHAIM POTOK I believe in work. If somebody doesn't create something, however small it may be, he gets sick. An a...
ARTHUR MILLER Go into the world and do well. But more importantly, go into the world and do good.
MINOR MYERS No work is insignificant. All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance and should be u...
MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. We cannot do everything, but we can all do something.
DILLON BURROUGHS There's the 'right way' and the 'usual way'.
Folks tend to confuse both.
The right way i...
UFUOMA APOKI Every time we made a comeback and every time we'd make a shot, they would come right back.
GABRIELLE RICHARDS Herb had a sense of humor for every situation - lighthearted or serious. With a joke he'd make somet...
BILL SHRANKO I could make a difference.
CHRIS BURKE I chose to go to law school because I thought that someday, somehow I'd make a difference.
CHRISTOPHER DARDEN A small change can make a big difference. You are the only one who can make our world a better place...
ANKITA SINGHAL Be who God meant you to be and you will set the world on fire.
CATHERINE OF SIENA I have one life and one chance to make it count for something... My faith demands that I do whatever...
JIMMY CARTER I never said to be like me, I say be yourself and make a difference.
MARILYN MANSON When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing w...
A.A. MILNE Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and s...
CARTER CROCKER When you are called for a great duty because you have been given a great ability, do your very best ...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH Every time the law goes against them, they try to find ways to circumvent the law. They're supposed ...
AL WILLIAMS I don't want to make money; I want to make a difference.
LADY GAGA A poor joke must invent its own laughter.
PROVERB If this could be repeated every day for a year, I would never budge from where I stood.
WENDY MASS Every time you pass a law, it is a little bite out of freedom.
GARY JOHNSON If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live wi...
JOAN POWERS Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?'
'Supposing it didn't,' said Pooh...
A.A. MILNE How lucky I am to have known somebody and something that saying goodbye to is so damned awful.
EVANS G. VALENS The issue is, can you make a law to restrict free speech? The First Amendment says that 'Congress sh...
GREG ALLEN I'm a thinker. That is what I do, in great depth and detail, every waking moment of the day. I like ...
BRIAN HERBERT Unification of differences is power.
SHESH NATH VERNWAL Being funny is one of my greatest strengths. I can make girls smile when they're down, and when ...
JOHN KRASINSKI Laughter is binary: It either happens or it doesn't. As each joke arrives in the course of a fil...
DAVID DOBKIN Behind every racist joke is a scientific fact.
MILO YIANNOPOULOS Victor patted my hand. 'I like you, Sky. You're a fighter.'
'I am, aren't I? Hear that, Zed? No...
JOSS STIRLING If every smile were received with another one returned, and we were to begin with our own, it wouldn...
JOEY TALLADINO If you have nothing to give to people, give them gentle smile and (or) kind word!
Give them love; gi...
NAS KIRIAKOS The purpose of life is to contribute in some way to making things better.
ROBERT F. KENNEDY It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness.
ELEANOR ROOSEVELT Never underestimate the difference YOU can make in the lives of others. Step forward, reach out and ...
PABLO Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit...
LOREN EISELEY Whatever is funny is subversive, every joke is ultimately a custard pie... a dirty joke is a sort of...
GEORGE ORWELL At time when there is so much concern about the distance between EU institutions and its citizens, i...
CHRIS DAVIES Portland hardly got to have an identity before that identity became a joke - I live in a joke. Seatt...
ISAAC BROCK I've been given an opportunity to make a difference.
TAMRON HALL Never doubt that one person can make a difference.
INGRID NEWKIRK What I like to do is try to make a difference with the work I do.
DAVID BOWIE It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.
STEVEN WRIGHT If your presence doesn't make an impact, your absence won't make a difference.
TREY SMITH You never know when the timing is going to hit in a such a way that you're going to make a diffe...
BOB CORKER Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law.
DICK CLARK Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?
DICK CLARK When a lot of voices, make up a noise, the man who is silent represents a voice.
APURVA GAGLANI I always make a joke that they transplanted Martina McBride's eyes and put them in my head.
BLAKE SHELTON A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time whe...
SHORT QUOTES Unsubscribe from should-a, would-a, could-a
MICHAEL H. DANSBURY A successful teacher is one who has atleast 2 students in his class, one who sees no reason to study...
APURVA GAGLANI Daring to dream is not difficult, it's making them come true that is hard...
NANETTE L. AVERY We name time when we say: every thing has its time. This means: everything which actually is, every ...
MARTIN HEIDEGGER I like how you don't hide your problems like everyone else, and I don't have to hide mine when I'm a...
NED VIZZINI Workers recognize that humor can make an office a more pleasant place to work and while acknowledgin...
CHRISTOPHER LEGROW It's not about making the right choice.
It's about making a choice and making it right.
J.R. RIM It's not about making the right choice. It's about making a choice and making it right.
J.R. RIM A godmother is always there and genuine.The help she has given will never be forgotten but will glis...
GARY F EVANS... If tomorrow was yesterday then yesterday would be tomorrow, if we think about the past why not think...
GARY F EVANS... Start seeing a way for yourself. Stop seeing a way for others.
APURVA GAGLANI and the girl and I get into her car and drive off into the hills and we go to her room and I take of...
BRET EASTON ELLIS Obedience is bondage, if God wants to be adored he should make himself more loving.
LAURA WHITCOMB If thinking is your fate, revere this fate with divine honour and sacrifice to it the best, the most...
FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE Life is a divine blessing for those who live life to add values in the lives of others.
SEEMA BRAIN OPENERS This time,like all times, is a good time, if we but know what to do with it.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON See, justice is a joke in this country, and it stinks of its hypocricy.
H. RAP BROWN I'm vitally interested in cyber crime and in preparing law enforcement for a time when crime is ...
JANET RENO Anyone can make people laugh with a good joke but a truly funny person will make you laugh telling a...
DANIEL GRAVES Every book, every volume you see here, has a soul. The soul of the person who wrote it and of those ...
CARLOS RUIZ ZAFóN It's the action, not the fruit of the action, that's important. You have to do the right thing. It m...
MAHATMA GANDHI ...If you can make a girl laugh - you can make her do anything...
MARILYN MONROE “Always remember that something as simple as planting a seed can grow into a HUGE Difference.”
PATTY RASE HOPSON A spontaneous prayer makes differences and does changes.
TOBA BETA Do I dare Disturb the universe?
T.S. ELIOT We are born different to make a difference.
LISA R. REYNOLDS Time will have its place, and every place will have its time...
SHANE J VAN DER VELDE It's easy to make a buck. It's a lot tougher to make a difference.
TOM BROKAW Each one of us can make a difference. Together we make change.
BARBARA MIKULSKI Little changes can start to make a difference in the world.
JANINE DI GIOVANNI We can make a difference. We can save lives. We can stop the genocide.
KENDRICK MEEK Make a difference about something other than yourselves.
TONI MORRISON The question that remains unanswered and keeps coming to the fore is ‘Are the punishment schemes f...
HENRIETTA NEWTON MARTIN LEGAL CONSULTANT Not everybody should be laughing at everything at the same time. That's not even natural. My thi...
PATRICE O'NEAL It's time to make our fireworks law legitimate.
REP. DAVE CROOKS I don't know if they're really like everybody else, or if they're able to pretend they are.
MADELEINE L'ENGLE In the land of Ingary where such things as seven-league boots and cloaks of invisibility really exis...
DIANA WYNNE JONES It's a joke. The city of Key West is its own worst enemy.
JOHN JONES It is the time that the state acquires its values and its proper place, being a guarantee of the law...
ALFRED MOISIU The GOP grows more and more unpopular with female voters seemingly every time one of its leaders get...
HENRY ROLLINS Well, you can't know it without something having been sneezed.
A.A. MILNE We'll be Friends Forever, won't we, Pooh?' asked Piglet.
Even longer,' Pooh answered.”
...
A.A. MILNE It's easier not to make a particular joke in case it offends. But every joke will offend someone...
DAVID WALLIAMS
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ANONYMOUS How do you get a Kleenex to dance?
Put a little boogy in it!
ANONYMOUS For you, I would swim across the ocean. LOL, just kidding, there are sharks in there.
ANONYMOUS Why does Chuck Norris' calendar go directly from March 31 to April 2nd? Nobody fools Chuck Norris!
ANONYMOUS I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.
ANONYMOUS Stop the earth from spinning, I want to get off!
ANONYMOUS If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter.
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ANONYMOUS Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
ANONYMOUS Everything happening now happens because of everything that has happened before.
ANONYMOUS When there's a will, I want to be in it.
ANONYMOUS Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
ANONYMOUS When is the longer way always better than the shorter one? When you're a taxi driver.
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ANONYMOUS What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.
ANONYMOUS I'm going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, I'm outstanding.
ANONYMOUS Oh I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
ANONYMOUS I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.
ANONYMOUS Think you're smart? Come over and help me with my homework.
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ANONYMOUS I'm trying to think how I can think of what I want to think.
ANONYMOUS People think.....
I'm skinny, but I'm really chunky.
I'm cheap, but I'm really thrifty. ANONYMOUS I looked into my wallet and it was empty, I looked through all my pockets and they were all empty. T...
ANONYMOUS I lost control. Offering reward to anyone who finds it.
ANONYMOUS Chuck Norris is so amazing he can:
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ANONYMOUS I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.
ANONYMOUS Stop! You're under arrest for being too sexy. Your sentence is an eternity inside my heart.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurrasic Park.
ANONYMOUS It's 11PM, do you know where your pants are?
ANONYMOUS Son, employees are like mules. Some you stand in front of and coax them along with a carrot. Some yo...
ANONYMOUS Don't believe everything fortune cookies tells you. Just because they're sweet doesn't mean they're...
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ANONYMOUS I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake.
ANONYMOUS How do I like my eggs? In a cake.
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ANONYMOUS Birthdays are nature's way of feeding us cake.
ANONYMOUS What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?
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ANONYMOUS Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong.
ANONYMOUS Smile while you still have teeth.
ANONYMOUS Have some patience, I'm screwing things up as fast as possible.
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ANONYMOUS Funny sign at health spa: Fresh 10,000 year old mud for sale.
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ANONYMOUS I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable.
ANONYMOUS True love is truly amazing only when it's truly true.
ANONYMOUS Being married means mostly shouting "What?" from other rooms.
ANONYMOUS Is it good if a blow dryer blows?
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ANONYMOUS Never judge a book by it's movie
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ANONYMOUS Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.
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ANONYMOUS I'm not frowning, I'm just smiling upside down.
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ANONYMOUS I can't wait for that to never happen.
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ANONYMOUS Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light.
ANONYMOUS Rudeness top moment: to scare an ostrich on an asphalt street.
ANONYMOUS I'm so sorry about what I said when I was hungry.
ANONYMOUS Always be positive. *Trips down the stairs* Whew, I got down those stairs fast.
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ANONYMOUS