FastSaying

When I'm at work I can fall asleep instantly, but when I'm in my bed I can hardly fall asleep.


Anonymous

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I'm so tired when I climb into bed at night, I fall right asleep.
FERN STAPLETON Sometimes,
all you can do
is lie in bed,
and hope
to fall asleep
before<...
WILLIAM C. HANNAN I sometimes suffer from insomnia. And when I can't fall asleep, I play what I call the alphabet ...
ROZ CHAST I don't really like coffee, she said, but I don't really like it when my head hits my desk when I fa...
BRIAN ANDREAS I like to fall asleep cause I can see u in my dreams. I love to awake cause I can see my dream is re...
MYRAMUSIC All that I have done will be remembered when I am all said and done.
TRUMAINE M. PRESSLEY I don't sleep much. It takes me a long time to fall asleep. I'm a bit of an insomniac but, w...
ENRIQUE IGLESIAS When you can't fall asleep at night or you keep waking up in the middle of the night, you have a low...
CHRIS MENO I find myself daydreaming about him when I wake up in the morning, in school when something reminds ...
SIMONE ELKELES At night, I can't fall asleep. In the morning, I can't get up.
ANONYMOUS My sister could fall asleep at the drop of a hat. She would fall asleep on the train. Me, I never sl...
CHERI OTERI People who can fall asleep quickly freak me out... I mean, don't they have thoughts?
ANONYMOUS I don't like to watch my own movies - I fall asleep in my own movies.
ROBERT DE NIRO Old age: I fall asleep during the funerals of my friends.
MASON COOLEY When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no si...
BRUCE AIDELLS I fell in love like you would fall asleep: slowly and then all at once.
JOHN GREEN Occasionally, they'll sit on my lap and fall asleep.
SHERRY MOWATT I thought he'd appreciate that. Whenever Tom led our morning worship service, he'd often just sit in...
GREG ROLLINS I think hallucinations need to be discussed. There are all sorts of hallucinations, and then many so...
OLIVER SACKS We are asleep until we fall in Love!
LEO TOLSTOY dont read my diary when im gone, ok im going to work now , when you wake up please read my diary, lo...
KURT COBAIN I’m scared to fall asleep. I don’t want to see it...
REBECCA YBARRA As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.
JOHN GREEN As he read, I feel in love the way you fall asleep: slow, and then all at once.
JOHN GREEN You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dream...
DR. SEUSS My biggest thrill in life is to read in the afternoon until I fall asleep and take a nap.
SISSY SPACEK Those who snore always fall asleep first.
ANONYMOUS Good night - may you fall asleep in the arms of a dream, so beautiful, you'll cry when you awake.
MICHAEL FAUDET I'm terrified of missing my call time. I'll check my alarm several times before I fall aslee...
J. D. PARDO Love is when you're kept up all night thinking of him, and then when you fall asleep, you find him i...
ROY CROFT Every night; every night I can't go sleep, ... I watch it until I fall asleep.
BYRON SANDERS I just wanted to get to my seat and fall asleep. And boom: There he is. Right there.
JAMIE MORRIS revolver under my bed as im pouring liquor out
NOBLE DA GENIUS Saturday mornings, I’ve learned, are a great opportunity for kids to sneak into your bed, fall bac...
DAN PEARCE I'm the kind of person who'll have a few drinks and fall asleep at 11.
SADIE FROST But the important thing is to lie down and fall asleep. That little nap means you wake up fresh agai...
JAMES LEVINE Im for rules but when rules conflicts humanity i will stand against it at all cost
MICHAEL STRONG So, fall asleep love, loved by me... for I know love, I am loved by thee.
ROBERT BROWNING So, fall asleep love, loved by me....for I know love, I am loved by thee.
ROBERT BROWNING So, fall asleep love, loved by me...for I know love, I am loved by thee.
ROBERT BROWNING Basically, when I get home I just do emails for around three hours, which stinks. I have a thing abo...
IVANKA TRUMP Insomnia is really a symptom (not a disease). It's really something someone complains to a doctor ab...
DR. MEIR KRYGER We fall asleep, and the guy scores. It can't happen.
JOE GIRARDI I don't know why it should be, I am sure; but the sight of another man asleep in bed when I am up, m...
JEROME K. JEROME I fall asleep with the sound of rain; I wake up with the songs of the wind.
DEBASISH MRIDHA Hey, coach, you want to put (a movie) in, maybe they'll fall asleep.
JOE POLIZZI California is the only state in the union where you can fall asleep under a rose bush in full bloom ...
We have the good, bad and the ugly. Sometimes people fall asleep and they don't know where they're g...
BROCK ROSAYN And that is the tip of the iceberg because you know they aren't alert before they fall asleep. That ...
AMY WOLFSON Let's just lay in the grass, and look at the stars, and fall asleep in the middle of counting.
KATE I think the American people are going to fall asleep watching the drab debate the dreary.
RALPH NADER Sleep is prohibited, I told them. Once you fall asleep, you might never wake up again.
LI YONG I would stress about being awoken because it was so hard for me to fall asleep.
SONDRA KORNBLATT But he’s the most familiar thing in this house, and I fall asleep better, listening to Baz breathe...
RAINBOW ROWELL Im okay Im okay now.
But you really need to listen to me
'cause im telling you the trut...
GERARD WAY On Sunday, we would just lay and watch football and fall asleep.
JT WOODRUFF When you fall asleep and dream of love, it becomes your morning glory as if you spent a night in hea...
FRANCESCO NICHOLAS CECE In order to fall asleep we must first close our eyes and pretend to be sleeping. Can the same be tru...
ROSS CALIGIURI Yes Im young,We Belong,Love Is Sung,By the peaceful Song...Listen Please, You'll fall to your knees,...
NOT YER TYPICAL DORK Asleep, he looked a lot younger than going-on-seventeen, but I had noticed that Johnny looked younge...
S.E. HINTON I wonder if I can grow fangs when my baby teeth fall out.
CALVIN & HOBBES America Singer, one day you will fall asleep in my arms every night. And you'll wake up to my kisses...
KIERA CASS What this does, at the very least, is raise the question of competence. Did someone fall asleep at t...
DENNIS GOLDFORD You know, there's so many accidents where drivers fall asleep and crash. I sure don't want that to h...
PAUL CHAPMAN Don't fall asleep yet. Contrary to popular belief, that's not where dreams get accomplished.
GEORGE WATSKY Be my bedtime story and the thoughts that won't let me fall asleep. Be the conversation that I alway...
AKSHAY VASU I did theater as a kid, more of an after-school program. But every night I would put on a movie and ...
SCOOT MCNAIRY I close my eyes, then I drift away, into the magic night I softly say. A silent prayer, like dreamer...
ROY ORBISON In sweet music is such art: killing care and grief of heart fall asleep, or hearing, die.
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE You're in a grassy meadow, don't move, relax your muscles, breathe. If you fall asleep, that's OK.
DEBRA SULLIVAN That's what I want without you running away afterward. I want to fall asleep and know there's no pla...
ANN AGUIRRE You can turn off the sun, but im still ganna shine!
JASON MRAZ I can fall in love in a simple way, but I can dissect it in such an intense fashion when it ends.
ELLIE GOULDING When we fall asleep, we withdraw our awareness from its hypnotic fascination with physical sensation...
HENRY REED Lidia Bastianich, sorry, but kind of boring. I mean, I love Lidia, but you can fall asleep watching ...
GIADA DE LAURENTIIS Im A Good Friend, But Im A Better Enemy.
DONALD C HALL So for now,
I will miss you like I’ll never see you again,
And the next time I see you,<...
CHARLOTTE ERIKSSON Im a soulless lawyer. Give me any opinion and I can argue it.
MEGYN KELLY Those with four or more electronic devices in their bedroom were twice as likely to fall asleep in s...
JODI MINDELL im still waiting for that kiss when my leg [(P o p s)]*
MEGAN some of the happiest moments of my life have occurred just before I fall asleep or wake up, when I l...
IRVING SINGER We'll see. If I don't get an answer before this evening, I'll take 25 pills and gently fall asleep i...
EVA BRAUN I think about dying a lot, every time I fall asleep on a train or a plane I expect to wake up to a c...
LEE RYAN Usually, if I can't fall asleep, you will find me catching up on a good book or zoning out with ...
IVANKA TRUMP We must not fall asleep in the present because the now moment is the only reality we truly have.
KAT LAHR I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride...
PABLO NERUDA I love you without knowing how, or when,or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride:...
PABLO NERUDA at night when all asleep; the spirits dance in the moonlight
DEBBIE NICHOLSON No, and I never, ever eat in between the meals. I control it well enough and with no pills, and I sl...
KARL LAGERFELD I get massages almost daily. Sometimes I fall asleep during the massage, but it's very important...
ANA IVANOVIC I don't watch a lot of TV. I just don't have a whole lot of time, and my life is so disorgan...
CHRISTOPHER MCCULLOCH I cry and wonder
how I'm going to fall asleep
because sleeping means waking
and going...
SAMANTHA SCHUTZ I fall asleep everywhere! Someone recently asked if they could publish a book of pictures of me slee...
CARA DELEVINGNE It was 8:30 a.m. and I was still asleep when the hospital at UC Davis called. They had a liver for m...
ERIKKA CHANCEY When you see them laying there, it's more along the lines that they're asleep and all you have to is...
TERRELL NELEMS We cannot appeal to the conscience of the world when our own conscience is asleep.
CARL VON OSSIETZKY The Indy 500 was on (TV) every year and my dad used to watch it. I used to watch the start, maybe, t...
DANICA PATRICK Im James Bond. Im Jason Bourne. Im Super-freaking-Mario come to life.
JOHN DAVID ANDERSON My mornings are really about being with my children, so I tend to lay out my outfit the night before...
IVANKA TRUMP Never felt lyk im alone bcoz my soul always follows me dats wat make me feel im not alone & I"ll nev...
RAKSHAN BHANDARY

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ANONYMOUS Friendship is a living thing that lasts only as long as it is nourished with kindness, empathy and u...
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ANONYMOUS Happiness is like jam. You can't spread even a little without getting some on yourself.
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ANONYMOUS Happiness is not pleasure, it's victory.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is the art of never holding in your mind the memory of any unpleasant thing that has passe...
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not given but exchanged.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly possessions. It's a mental attitude. It comes f...
ANONYMOUS If happiness could be brought, few of us could pay the price.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is like a butterfly. The more you chase it, the more it eludes you. But if you turn your a...
ANONYMOUS So live that your memories will be part of your happiness.
ANONYMOUS Happiness consists in activity; such as the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and ...
ANONYMOUS Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
ANONYMOUS Happiness is not always measured in smiles.
ANONYMOUS Happiness lies in our own backyard, but it's probably well hidden by crabgrass.
ANONYMOUS Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
ANONYMOUS The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
ANONYMOUS Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle ...
ANONYMOUS Faith is like electricity. You can't see it, but you can see the light.
ANONYMOUS To reprove small faults within due vehemence, is as absurd as if a man should take a great hammer to...
ANONYMOUS My friend, why have you drifted so far away? All motion is relative, maybe it is you who have moved ...
ANONYMOUS The happiest business in all the world is that of making friends, And no investment on the street pa...
ANONYMOUS Flattery looks like friendship, just like a wolf looks like a dog.
ANONYMOUS Remember that the faith that moves mountains always carries a pick.
ANONYMOUS When you laugh, be sure to laugh at what people do and not at what people are.
ANONYMOUS The sound of a kiss is much softer than that of a cannon - but it's echo lasts a great deal longer.
ANONYMOUS Religion is like a blind man looking in a black room for a black cat that isn't there, and finding i...
ANONYMOUS A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
ANONYMOUS When life throws a lemon at you, you throw it straight back at life and miss completely. That's my l...
ANONYMOUS Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.
ANONYMOUS Aging is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
ANONYMOUS I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, ...
ANONYMOUS تبسمك في وجه أخيك صدقة، وأمرك بالمعروف صدقة ونهيك عن ال...
ANONYMOUS The first men to be created and formed were called the Sorcerer of Fatal Laughter, the Sorcerer of N...
ANONYMOUS Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you...
ANONYMOUS And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
ANONYMOUS Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for ...
ANONYMOUS Anyone who is having troubles should pray. Anyone who is happy should sing praises. Anyone who is si...
ANONYMOUS I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.
ANONYMOUS Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us.
ANONYMOUS Store front sign: Entire store on sale, everything $1 or more.
ANONYMOUS If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives.
ANONYMOUS Why didn't Bruce Willis play the lead role in Titanic? He would have saved everyone.
ANONYMOUS I'm looking to buy a new boomerang, how can I throw the old one out?
ANONYMOUS My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!
ANONYMOUS If you can't find your better half, try finding your better two quarters.
ANONYMOUS Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it.
ANONYMOUS It's easy to stop smoking. I stopped smoking today with no problems. I also stopped yesterday too,...
ANONYMOUS One day my wife's credit card got stolen.. what a relief it was to find that the thief spends less t...
ANONYMOUS The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.
ANONYMOUS In my house dirty dishes are like rabbits, they keep multiplying.
ANONYMOUS How do you get a Kleenex to dance?
Put a little boogy in it!
ANONYMOUS For you, I would swim across the ocean. LOL, just kidding, there are sharks in there.
ANONYMOUS Why does Chuck Norris' calendar go directly from March 31 to April 2nd? Nobody fools Chuck Norris!
ANONYMOUS I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.
ANONYMOUS Stop the earth from spinning, I want to get off!
ANONYMOUS If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter.
ANONYMOUS The last thing that blew my mind was the wind.
ANONYMOUS Why do you always see lightning first and hear the thunder later? Because your eyes are in front of...
ANONYMOUS Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I ...
ANONYMOUS Stupidity is far more fascinating than intelligence, after all intelligence has it's limits.
ANONYMOUS Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on a beach drinking margaritas.
ANONYMOUS My kitchen cleaner says "for a clean kitchen" so I can't use it, mine is dirty.
ANONYMOUS Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
ANONYMOUS Everything happening now happens because of everything that has happened before.
ANONYMOUS When there's a will, I want to be in it.
ANONYMOUS Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
ANONYMOUS When is the longer way always better than the shorter one? When you're a taxi driver.
ANONYMOUS As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible.
ANONYMOUS When the cop told me to give him my first name and last name I told him, 'Are you crazy? What's my ...
ANONYMOUS Always be yourself, unless you can be a unicorn. Then always be a unicorn.
ANONYMOUS What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.
ANONYMOUS I'm going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, I'm outstanding.
ANONYMOUS Oh I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
ANONYMOUS I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.
ANONYMOUS Think you're smart? Come over and help me with my homework.
ANONYMOUS Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it.
ANONYMOUS Newspaper Ad: Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!!
ANONYMOUS I bet you anything that I can stop gambling right now.
ANONYMOUS My doctor prescribed laughter as the most efficient medicine. Unfortunately the pharmacist said too ...
ANONYMOUS Finding a treasure is like working on algebra equations, all you have to do is find the X.
ANONYMOUS I'm trying to think how I can think of what I want to think.
ANONYMOUS People think.....
I'm skinny, but I'm really chunky.
I'm cheap, but I'm really thrifty. ANONYMOUS I looked into my wallet and it was empty, I looked through all my pockets and they were all empty. T...
ANONYMOUS I lost control. Offering reward to anyone who finds it.
ANONYMOUS Chuck Norris is so amazing he can:

Light ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.<...
ANONYMOUS Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time a...
ANONYMOUS He grabbed her hand and held it tightly, and she thought, "he loves me!" And he thought, "wow this ...
ANONYMOUS I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition.
ANONYMOUS I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.
ANONYMOUS Stop! You're under arrest for being too sexy. Your sentence is an eternity inside my heart.
ANONYMOUS Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurrasic Park.
ANONYMOUS It's 11PM, do you know where your pants are?
ANONYMOUS Son, employees are like mules. Some you stand in front of and coax them along with a carrot. Some yo...
ANONYMOUS Don't believe everything fortune cookies tells you. Just because they're sweet doesn't mean they're...
ANONYMOUS Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!
ANONYMOUS I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake.
ANONYMOUS How do I like my eggs? In a cake.
ANONYMOUS My grandpa's car is so old; when he parked in front of a museum, they towed his car inside the museu...
ANONYMOUS Birthdays are nature's way of feeding us cake.
ANONYMOUS What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?
ANONYMOUS I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.
ANONYMOUS There was a robot invented in China that catches thieves. In Australia it caught 10 thieves, in Ame...
ANONYMOUS I'm a Victoria's Secret model. It's such a secret, not even Victoria knows.
ANONYMOUS How is a poor man a lot like a rich man? They both have an iPhone.
ANONYMOUS Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong.
ANONYMOUS Smile while you still have teeth.
ANONYMOUS Have some patience, I'm screwing things up as fast as possible.
ANONYMOUS After many years of studying my Geography book I finally know by heart that Australia is on page 23.
ANONYMOUS Funny sign at health spa: Fresh 10,000 year old mud for sale.
ANONYMOUS I always mean what I say, I don't always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.
ANONYMOUS I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable.
ANONYMOUS True love is truly amazing only when it's truly true.
ANONYMOUS Being married means mostly shouting "What?" from other rooms.
ANONYMOUS Is it good if a blow dryer blows?
ANONYMOUS Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
ANONYMOUS Never test how deep the water is with both feet.
ANONYMOUS Never judge a book by it's movie
ANONYMOUS I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side, my legs for always supporting me, and my ...
ANONYMOUS When you have a hammer in your hand everything around you starts looking like a nail.
ANONYMOUS Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring so I go back to being myself.
ANONYMOUS If you didn't see it with your own eyes, or hear it with your own ears, don't invent it with your sm...
ANONYMOUS My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do.
ANONYMOUS I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better.
ANONYMOUS Officer: I had a feeling I'd catch someone speeding here. Driver: I know, that's why I came as fast...
ANONYMOUS I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close ...
ANONYMOUS Today I saw something through a store window that was truly stunning, beautiful and sexy. I wanted ...
ANONYMOUS Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon.
ANONYMOUS Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.
ANONYMOUS I'm not really a control freak, but... can I show the right way to do that?
ANONYMOUS A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
ANONYMOUS I once finished first on my running team, then the coach asked me where everyone else is.
ANONYMOUS Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.
ANONYMOUS Why is the sky blue? Sure there is an explanation, but lets just be thankful it's not red!
ANONYMOUS Just because I can't sing doesn't mean that I won't sing.
ANONYMOUS Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place... the fridge.
ANONYMOUS I'm not frowning, I'm just smiling upside down.
ANONYMOUS The only problem with golf is that the slow people are always in front of you and the fast people al...
ANONYMOUS I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom.
ANONYMOUS The amount of time it takes for a minute to go by is proportionally dependent with the distance to t...
ANONYMOUS Bathroom sign above toilet: It's like basketball, the basket is bigger than the ball! Learn to sco...
ANONYMOUS I can't wait for that to never happen.
ANONYMOUS I liked the movie Titanic, my favorite character was the iceberg.
ANONYMOUS Sports top moment: to score a goal but miss in the re-play.
ANONYMOUS Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light.
ANONYMOUS Rudeness top moment: to scare an ostrich on an asphalt street.
ANONYMOUS I'm so sorry about what I said when I was hungry.
ANONYMOUS Always be positive. *Trips down the stairs* Whew, I got down those stairs fast.
ANONYMOUS Beauty is mysterious as well as terrible.
ANONYMOUS An expert is a person who has made every possible mistake in a small field of study.
ANONYMOUS My taste in music ranges from "You've gotta listen to this" to "I know, please don't judge me."
ANONYMOUS Just because it's called makeup, it doesn't mean it should make up 100% of your face.
ANONYMOUS You can't please everyone, you're not a Nutella jar.
ANONYMOUS Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.
ANONYMOUS It's better to shut up and give the impression that you're stupid than to say something and erase al...
ANONYMOUS If we ever travel far in the universe to another planet with intelligent life, let's just make patte...
ANONYMOUS Whenever you feel stupid, remember that there are people outside searching for Pokemon.
ANONYMOUS