It’s absolutely unfair for women to say that guys only want one thing: sex. We also want food.
Jarod Kintz
Related
If you were to ask Jarod Kintz what his personal favourite joke was, he'd say the one with ...
STEFAN D When Jarod Kintz gets married, I want to wear his grandpa to the ceremony, telling everyone we're Si...
WILL ADVISE It’s the strangest thing about this church - it is obsessed with sex, absolutely obsessed. Now, th...
STEPHEN FRY Jarod Kintz gets so many retweets, he’s like Katniss Everdeen with tourettes in a forest full of M...
RYAN LILLY - Why is depression the blues and not the grays?
- Because racer!
-Jarod Kintz and Stefan...
STEFAN D No, no food. I want sex. Bring me some sex.
ELLIOTT GOULD My grandpa, unlike Jarod Kintz, was an Elder. Now that he's dead and gone, he's a ghost French wizar...
WILL ADVISE - Thirteen numbers applied to be on the face of the clock, and I hand selected each one.
- Sele...
STEFAN D If I were offering hip replacement services I'd use Jarod Kintz as my spokesman. No one can possibly...
WILL ADVISE I hate when I'm not done with my cup but my mom decides to put it in the dishwasher anyway and the c...
KAREN QUAN I just want to come by and say that Greg and the crew at Simmons Homes, you guys have been absolutel...
TY PENNINGTON We, women, are not receptacles. Sex should not feel like a burden, duty, or chore. Sex is also not o...
MARTHA LEE When I battle wits with Jarod Kintz I always feel like I need to take my brain out to give him a tra...
WILL ADVISE not only have sex with men, but also with women.
WANG LONGDE We want the government to make arrangements for food and other things for the drivers. We also want ...
KARAN SINGH I hope we can be consummate artists as women or revolutionaries, or whatever women want to be, and a...
LAURA DERN You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.
STEVE MARTIN You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither
DREW CAREY Sigmund Freud once said, "What do women want?" The only thing I have learned in fifty-two years is t...
BILL COSBY A man marries to have a home, but also because he doesn't want to be bothered with sex and all that ...
WILLIAM SOMERSET MAUGHAM This goes to also say how fortunate you are to have this chance. We do not want to say that we quali...
JACK WARNER It's absolutely wrong that I don't want guys to challenge me. And the people who say that ar...
MICHAEL JORDAN Women don't always want to be treated like we're delicate, or rare, or somehow more precious. We wan...
CHRISTINA LAUREN If Jarod Kintz was a cat, he'd stalk people silently and deadly. Right now, all he does is bark at t...
WILL ADVISE When you're reaching the end of the semester and you just wanna die. Coffin Making 101 is literally ...
KAREN QUAN As much as I want it to empty. I’m worried that feelings are the one thing in our lives that we ha...
COLLEEN HOOVER The guys with the big deficits want to stimulate policy. And the guys with the big surpluses remain ...
BILL STERLING (McCarthy) was the only good thing I saw tonight. I don't want to talk about how I feel about my tea...
OZZIE GUILLEN I know just one thing is those guys, KG and everyone, they're hungry. They want it bad. Sam'...
LATRELL SPREWELL Whatever you want the most, it’s going to be the worst thing for you.
BARBARA KINGSOLVER We don't want to burden individuals with unfair taxes.
LYNN SWANN It’s not that I want to get married. I admire guys who can commit to a tattoo.
CHUCK PALAHNIUK I never say never, because I don't want to be one of those guys.
BOB SEGER People are wanting a different connection with their food. They want not only to do the right thing,...
KRISTINE GREIBER Life isn’t fair, but that doesn’t mean it’s unfair – it is just different for every person. ...
JANINE LATTIMORE The most unfair thing about life is you only get one.
AARON KNIGHT IMESHO (In My Ever So Humble Opinion:) women use food and sex as weapons, or at least for leverage i...
KEN O. ELDIB I really hate that I need my glasses while using my laptop. What I hate even more is that I need tho...
KAREN QUAN Absolutely eat dessert first. The thing that you want to do the most, do that.
JOSS WHEDON I have a very addictive personality. If it isn’t women, it’s money. If it isn’t money, it’s ...
CARLA H. KRUEGER Some say one thing and do another. Others say one thing and do it just for spite. I say far too much...
EFRAT CYBULKIEWICZ We?re focusing on food service providers that want to put a face on their food, that want local food...
GARY PETERSON The only thing I want to say is, I know I'm not Einstein, but I'm not the queen of the imbec...
VANESSA PARADIS This is food for your family. We want to make sure that everything we offer is something you can tru...
BRENDA REID What editors are obliged to appear to say that men want from women is actually what their ...
NAOMI WOLF One thing I always used to say: Being a part of the gang was like being a broke millionaire. In that...
DREXEL DEAL You're not begging for food. We want to help.
AMY NEWMAN I never say never, because I don't want to be one of those guys.
BOB SEGER Women are not complicated or confusing. It’s just that most men don’t understand that women just...
NICK KINSELLA The thing about linemen is they got to be athletes - you don't want the big fat guys that can't move...
MARK MCHALE Life's irony;The only time some women imagination faculty is put to use is when they want to prepare...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) We think that this election was absolutely unfair, absolutely unlawful, and it's an obvious sign tha...
ZHARMAKHAN TUYAKBAI When we want something, we have to have a clear purpose in mind for the thing that we want. The only...
PAULO COELHO We're looking for ambitious guys who also want to get around the 'frat boy' image.
PAUL HANUS We believe it's absolutely unfair and unjust that they just arbitrarily say they won't pay. There co...
WAYNE FISHER Unless you have the
courage to say ‘no’ to
the things you don’t want,
it’s ha...
DOMONIQUE BERTOLUCCI I want, in this school, that one sex shall have equal advantage with the other, and I want particula...
LELAND STANFORD Agents and publishers only want one thing - good writing.
JASPER FFORDE I only want one thing from fake people: distance.
ANONYMOUS Men we drive ourselves crazy. Men always want to marry a virgin, but during the act of sex on the we...
JERRY SEINFIELD It's a real juggle for us. We need the guys to play together, to get them exposure, but we also want...
GLEN ELLA Women are the bloodthirsty sex," said Ric sadly. "We get the reputation, but it is only because the ...
PATRICIA BRIGGS If they want their teens to abstain from sex, they need to say exactly what they want their kids to ...
BILL ALBERT What I want from you is simple. I want today only.
If it’s laughter, I want it. If it�...
D. LOVE Cosmo is feminist in that we believe women are just as smart and capable as men and can achieve anyt...
HELEN GURLEY BROWN I don’t want anyone to hold back who they are. It’s not okay… it’s not a good thing
CONNOR FRANTA The only thing we have to go on is our own sense of what's funny. We try to do a radio show that we ...
PETER SAGAL There’s only one way America’s neighborhoods will begin to integrate: people have to want it mor...
TANNER COLBY I can remember only one thing.
I want to be bigger.
I want to be better.
I want - p...
GIAN ANDREA I feel that thing again. The thing I only felt once before. In the cave last year, when I was trying...
SUZANNE COLLINS To have sex is to want another person's body only,but to make love is to want another person's body ...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) The main thing we didn't want was to let those guys settle into isolation situations.
DESMOND MASON No one is untouchable, it would be unfair to say that.
SVEN GORAN ERIKSSON Ladies, if you’re single there is nothing wrong, sinful or wicked about desiring a husband, nothin...
MATT CHANDLER I only want one thing of men, and that is, that they should leave me alone.
D.H. LAWRENCE Sometimes we want what we want even if we know it’s going to kill us.
DONNA TARTT When your heart starts to feel full again. I love FREE refills, and if a restaurant tries to double ...
KAREN QUAN We just learned about this fetish where guys just give women money and know that they are spending t...
NIKKI GLASER I never see my bad guys as simply bad. They want pretty much the same thing that you and I want: the...
ELMORE LEONARD We want to not only be stewards of the property, but also act as a leader by doing the right thing b...
KAT IMHOFF As life's pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs. Now that's better th...
ALAN KING Obviously, that's on our mind. We don't want to take that early morning flight to Vegas on Tuesday. ...
GARETT BEMBRIDGE That’s what being alive is, Thing! It’s being badly prepared for everything! Because you only ge...
TERRY PRATCHETT Needless to say, we are very pleased with these results. I do want to emphasize that the most import...
JOHN CLIFFORD I mean you looked at me, and you could tell something was wrong. But I also lied through my teeth. B...
JAMIE SILVERSTEIN Shows like 'Sex and the City' got women involved again in a political way. They were drawn i...
KIM CATTRALL We do at least one a week. We also develop our own leads and check out false advertisements in the n...
CARL VEGA I'm gonna go put my earplugs in and practice piano for hours until my fingers bleed. I practice the ...
KAREN QUAN People are going to say what they want to say. We want to follow the same barometer for all cases, a...
ATTORNEY MORANO People are going to say what they want to say. We want to follow the same barometer for all cases, a...
ATTORNEY CHRISTOPHER MORANO The last thing we want to do is take on 100 million guys who are paper pushers.
KEVIN O'HARA I don't want to play only Latin women. I want to have roles in English.
PAZ VEGA It’s not loving a man that makes life harder for gay guys, it’s homophobia. It’s not the color...
ASHTON APPLEWHITE When you think about those of us that live the life that we want to live, we can thank absolutely an...
WAYNE NEWTON We don't want anything special; the only thing we want is the atmosphere and facilities to be educat...
ABDUL RAHIM It reflects a realism that women are going to have to take more responsibility. It also said to us, ...
MARY FARRELL Why should I limit myself to only one woman when I can have as many women as I want?
GEORGE GERSHWIN Women tell stories; men want answers. Guys get impatient when we drone on forever; we get frustrated...
JENNA MCCARTHY We'll decide on a starter based on what we want to do. If we want to pass, it'll be Farmer. If we wa...
MOUSE DAVIS I am not here for women only, but also for women.
ANGELA MERKEL
More Jarod Kintz
Love is like jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. But there’s no need to be frightened, b...
JAROD KINTZ If there are two men, Rod and Rob, and you can only steal from one, which one would you choose? The ...
JAROD KINTZ She said she was a nurse. I replied that she must have a lot of patience—and patients. I would hav...
JAROD KINTZ I’ll give you 50% off for half a year, or 100% off for a whole year. At these bargain discount pri...
JAROD KINTZ What do you mean love is not for sale? Then what the hell did I just buy? And why is it grandma-shap...
JAROD KINTZ A fly can fly, so man should be called walk. If you want to make love, I’ll bring the wheelchair, ...
JAROD KINTZ When traveling on foot through the Sahara Desert, be sure to pack several gallons of ice cream, and ...
JAROD KINTZ I work in a secret whisper factory. It’s all very hush-hush. Her love for me could be found there,...
JAROD KINTZ I predict that love will burst forth on the Fourth of July. That’s tomorrow, so I’d better prepa...
JAROD KINTZ I will paint a classic car yellow and convert it into a bulldozer. If you need me, I’ll be in the ...
JAROD KINTZ This year I vow to learn how to garden. I will be the Farmer of Love and grow in understanding and f...
JAROD KINTZ Everyone is different from each other, but that doesn’t mean everyone should be indifferent to eac...
JAROD KINTZ Too little light and man can’t see, just as too much light and man is blinded. Love is a light, an...
JAROD KINTZ Don’t sleep with a blindfold on. Sleep with your eyes open and alert, because love may come in you...
JAROD KINTZ Though it comes from her throat, I drink the sound of her voice. Her I love yous dehydrate me, becau...
JAROD KINTZ In today's classroom everybody wins a trophy, even the one kid who actually won. Soon it will be, le...
JAROD KINTZ I’ll repeat phrases over and over in a spiral and use the shape to design a building. Would you re...
JAROD KINTZ We must make love to find out how it’s made. I don’t know what the ingredients are, but I think ...
JAROD KINTZ She bats her eyelashes like I’m throwing baseballs at them. I must be as romantic as Pete Rose’s...
JAROD KINTZ People won't buy study guides for a dollar, but they will pay 100 dollars for test answers. A #st...
JAROD KINTZ I thirst for love like a camel thirsts for water. I’m going through a desert right now, but I’m ...
JAROD KINTZ I cry, but not for myself. There’s too much sadness in this world to waste a moment with self-pity...
JAROD KINTZ My ticket's been bought, and my luggage is packed. I'm storing both of my bags under my eyes. Or am ...
JAROD KINTZ Sleep is the breakfast of champions. This morning I had two big bowls full, each two hours deep.
JAROD KINTZ Even though it’s locked in a cage, my heart is a bird that flutters at the sound of her voice, as ...
JAROD KINTZ I watch you like a mirror, because I see in you what I see in myself. Who we love is a reflection of...
JAROD KINTZ If I were a Wild West cowboy, I wouldn’t ride a horse—I’d ride a wheelchair. More romantic.
JAROD KINTZ I would rather make love than war, but only because condoms kill millions of lives more enjoyably.
JAROD KINTZ Should I go up one flight of stairs and then come back down, or should I go down one flight of stair...
JAROD KINTZ If you were to ask me the best time of day to fall in love, I'd say, "Now." But you'd also have to r...
JAROD KINTZ I’m willing to die for the woman I love. I just want to take 75 years to do it.
JAROD KINTZ The Chair
I’m writing to you, who made the archaic wooden chair
look like a ...
JAROD KINTZ I’m going outside to get a breath of fresh air. Anybody got a cigarette I can have?
JAROD KINTZ I wish my stove came with a Save As button like Word has. That way I could experiment with my cookin...
JAROD KINTZ I want to write an unreliable narrator. In fact, he’ll be so unreliable that I’m not even sure h...
JAROD KINTZ I like eye contact, but please don’t blink when my eyeballs are touching yours.
JAROD KINTZ Just because I liked something at one point in time doesn’t mean I’ll always like it, or that I ...
JAROD KINTZ Whether you live to be 50 or 100 makes no difference, if you made no difference in the world.
JAROD KINTZ I dance like I have a chip on my shoulder. I dance salsa.
JAROD KINTZ When you're here, I'm there for you. And when you're there, I'm here for you.
JAROD KINTZ Can you break my five-dollar bill into five singles? Women love guys with lots of money.
JAROD KINTZ Wisdom equals knowledge plus courage. You have to not only know what to do and when to do it, but yo...
JAROD KINTZ I wrote a thesis on love, and I wrote it in lipstick. Of course, I also got blood on the paper, beca...
JAROD KINTZ I make love like an albino sings—softly, and from sunset to sunrise (except in Alaska).
JAROD KINTZ I have a stalker, a beautiful one: the sunset. Every day she’s there, watching me, whether I watch...
JAROD KINTZ Writers fish for the right words like fishermen fish for, um, whatever those aquatic creatures with ...
JAROD KINTZ The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car....
JAROD KINTZ One of my main regrets in life is giving considerable thought to inconsiderate people.
JAROD KINTZ Drinking coffee is like drinking an inverse yawn. I prefer mine with two spoonfuls of “I’m liste...
JAROD KINTZ She didn't say it, I only thought she said it. So really it was my thought, my words, and not hers. ...
JAROD KINTZ A wife is a friend first, a lover second, and third and probably most important, a maid.
JAROD KINTZ I am the archaeologist of love. I’m digging for the bones of a loved one I shot and buried decades...
JAROD KINTZ Love is like a forest, I think as I kill trees by squandering toilet paper while “decorating” my...
JAROD KINTZ I think Gummy Bears should be the universal symbol for peace, because peace leads to prosperity, pro...
JAROD KINTZ Pick a number between one to ten. Now, pick the number that you think I picked you to pick.
JAROD KINTZ When I hear someone’s sick, my first thought is selfishly, Better him than me. My second thought i...
JAROD KINTZ To Do Today, 1/17/08
1. Sit and think
2. Reach enlightenment
3. Feed the cats
JAROD KINTZ I’m not a very good sleeper. But you know what? I’m willing to put in a few extra hours every da...
JAROD KINTZ If coffee meant vagina, I’d ask you if you wanted cream in your coffee. But it doesn’t mean that...
JAROD KINTZ Here's a haiku/palindrome I wrote called, "Obsession."
Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob,
Bob,...
JAROD KINTZ When I say something, I mean what I say, despite what a dictionary says I mean. Meanings of words ar...
JAROD KINTZ My life motto: My brakes are broke, but luckily my gas pedal works just fine.
JAROD KINTZ If I were to come back in another life, I’d like to be reincarnated as my own clone.
JAROD KINTZ I wouldn’t advise making a four-year commitment to eventually land an $8.00/hour job. Skip college...
JAROD KINTZ College has given me the confidence I need to fail.
JAROD KINTZ If flowers were boogers, I'd pick a few big ones and flick them on your grave.
JAROD KINTZ I want to grow a flower for every time someone tells me “F*** you.” Then I’ll go back to that ...
JAROD KINTZ Goodbyes, they often come in waves.
JAROD KINTZ The mouth is made for communication,and nothing is more articulate than a kiss
JAROD KINTZ Leave me with my leftover meatloaf and my Yesterday Sandwich. I’ll be in love tomorrow, if you com...
JAROD KINTZ I run like I have cirrus clouds for legs and rainbow knees. What is life, if not a marathon of love?...
JAROD KINTZ I loved her like elephants like remembering stuff. Those bastards just won’t let me forget and mov...
JAROD KINTZ I coiled my empty straw wrapper around like a snake. Then I bit it before it could bite me. My love ...
JAROD KINTZ Love is like breakfast with Mildred. Who’s Mildred? How the heck should I know? I don’t eat brea...
JAROD KINTZ Love is a circular emotion that surrounds you, like a hug. Or a noose.
JAROD KINTZ I cut an inch off of every straw I see, just to make the world suck a little less.
JAROD KINTZ I don’t know what’s in the box, but I love it. Unopened gifts contain hope.
JAROD KINTZ My next breath may very well be in your lungs. Store it wisely, because my life depends on it.
JAROD KINTZ It’s what you do in your free time that will set you free—or enslave you.
JAROD KINTZ I can bench press steam, but not fog. I just have to wait until the fog lifts itself.
JAROD KINTZ When faced with two equally tough choices, most people choose the third choice: to not choose.
JAROD KINTZ The year you were born marks only your entry into the world. Other years where you prove your worth,...
JAROD KINTZ Sometimes the thing that brings us together also pulls us apart. Sort of like a zipper.
JAROD KINTZ One of the most productive ways a government can spend money on the people is by building more priso...
JAROD KINTZ With my last breath, I’ll exhale my love for you. I hope it’s a cold day, so you can see what yo...
JAROD KINTZ I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me.
JAROD KINTZ Patience and wisdom walk hand in hand, like two one-armed lovers.
JAROD KINTZ You can’t put a price tag on love. But if you could, I’d wait for it to go on sale.
JAROD KINTZ The best part about having children is being able to point at them and proudly proclaim, "Hey, I mad...
JAROD KINTZ Can America get back to a point where politicians are honest? Not unless that point is the tip of a ...
JAROD KINTZ She looked like the kind of woman I could fall in love with. Trouble is, she was standing next to th...
JAROD KINTZ Insider trading is a serious crime. Do you know what the penalty for doing it is? Nothing, if you’...
JAROD KINTZ I had a dream about you. We were at a buffet, but instead of eating food, we were forced to eat our ...
JAROD KINTZ I had a dream about you. We were fishing in the Utah desert. You caught a dinosaur, but due to Feder...
JAROD KINTZ I had a dream about you. We were in a band. I was the lead singer, guitar player, saxophonist, harpi...
JAROD KINTZ Reading—it’s the third best thing to do in bed.
JAROD KINTZ Blood may be thicker than water, but it's certainly not as thick as ketchup. Nor does it go as well ...
JAROD KINTZ If I told you I’ve worked hard to get where I’m at, I’d be lying, because I have no idea where...
JAROD KINTZ Love one person at a time, that’s the motto I’ll try to get my clones to live by.
JAROD KINTZ I have a beard of fog that I wear on misty mornings. It’s not cigarette smoke, but I’d understan...
JAROD KINTZ I’m not waiting until my hair turns white to become patient and wise. Nope, I’m dyeing my hair t...
JAROD KINTZ I think the key indicator for wealth is not good grades, work ethic, or IQ. I believe it's relations...
JAROD KINTZ A traditional doctor gets paid to push pills, vaccinate, radiate, and basically exterminate people. ...
JAROD KINTZ I am the sunrise of sunsets, and I make love like noon at midnight.
JAROD KINTZ Laughter is the sound of the soul dancing. My soul probably looks like Fred Astaire.
JAROD KINTZ Roses may say “I love you,” but the cactus says “Fuck off.
JAROD KINTZ Love may make you feel blue, love may make you feel green, and sometimes love may even make you feel...
JAROD KINTZ Two become one when two are in love—or when the waitress asks about our dinner bill. I’ll pay ne...
JAROD KINTZ Love is the jelly to sunshine’s peanut butter. And if I tell you that I’m in sandwich with you, ...
JAROD KINTZ I talked to a calzone for fifteen minutes last night before I realized it was just an introverted pi...
JAROD KINTZ It was impressive that their team had all the momentum and we kept our composure and executed our of...
VIC KINTZ One game in this region could be the matter of going to the state tournament or sitting home and wat...
JAROD INGERSOLL He's a great hitter, and he's got that kind of pop in his bat.
JAROD INGERSOLL Whenever he's had proper rest, he just flat out pitches for us. He was hitting his spots, and he mix...
JAROD INGERSOLL When we come to play with enthusiasm, and we're all together, we're a pretty good team.
JAROD INGERSOLL He's (Smith) a good pitcher. We know he's one of the top three pitchers in the state. We know he's a...
JAROD INGERSOLL He's been solid all year for us in middle relief, and he came in and got the job done again today.
JAROD INGERSOLL The baseball here is just a lot of fun right now. The kids all love baseball. They love to play it a...
JAROD INGERSOLL This is my favorite tournament I've been to since I've been coaching here (American Fork). I love Br...
JAROD INGERSOLL The facilities departments will have command centers set up at both the North and South sites. It wi...
JAROD TUFTS Without proper communication, people will wonder why they're left in the dark, and assume the worst.
JAROD TUFTS For the administrators who dial in from California, yeah, I'm concerned, but in many cases I didn't ...
JAROD TUFTS In some cases this person will be on-site, but in many cases they won't.
JAROD TUFTS We're not complacent, but we have an extreme sense of confidence in our status for the transition. W...
JAROD TUFTS He's been the catalyst for our team all season.
JAROD INGERSOLL