Jerry Seinfield quote: "Men we drive ourselves crazy. Men always want to marry a virgin, but during the act of sex on the wedding night we tell the women to say 'you're the best, you're the best', then afterwards we wonder better than who?"

I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?'
JERRY SEINFIELD

There is one service men provide to women everywhere, regardless of race or culture, and that is cou...
JERRY SEINFIELD

I see TV ads about detergents that can get blood stains out of your cloths. I say if you have blood ...
JERRY SEINFIELD

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You can't stare at it long, it's too risky. You get ...
JERRY SEINFIELD

Gangsta rap was the most important movement since the beginning of rock n' roll.
JERRY HELLER

Perfection has to do with the end product, but excellence has to do with the process.
JERRY MORAN

We are all born as empty vessels which can be shaped by moral values.
JERRY SPRINGER

Because you can't do anything halfway, you've got to go all the way in anything you do.
JERRY BRUCKHEIMER

To me, it's not the end of the world if I end up not being with someone. I love romance. I love ...
JERRY HALL

We want young people to know what they believe, why they believe it. I believe America was built on ...
JERRY FALWELL

Works of art often last forever, or nearly so. But exhibitions themselves, especially gallery exhibi...
JERRY SALTZ

I never realized that growing up in Brooklyn, flying jets, working on Wall Street and starring in a ...
JERRY DOYLE

We have to restore power to the family, to the neighborhood, and the community with a non-market pri...
JERRY BROWN

There is a public perception that Paris Hilton is the black sheep of the family.
JERRY OPPENHEIMER

It took the Metropolitan Museum of Art nearly 50 years to wake up to Pablo Picasso. It didn't ow...
JERRY SALTZ

Kevin Garnett was a great player, but he wasn't Kobe Bryant.
JERRY WEST

I guess I've always been a groupie. My first date was a bull rider called Tommy Lee Bryant. We&#...
JERRY HALL

I studied drama in high school, and when I was 18, I studied at the Actors Studio in New York. Then ...
JERRY HALL

When I was young, I was a sucker for smooth men. Bryan Ferry hired me, at 19, to be painted blue and...
JERRY HALL

I see myself as the buffer between the band and the record company.
JERRY HARRISON

New Yorkers only cross water for visual culture if the water is an ocean. The East River throws us f...
JERRY SALTZ

Whoever is sitting in the White House, especially in their second term, when gas goes up to $3 a gal...
JERRY FALWELL

You wouldn't want to see the size of the check that I would write if it would for sure get the D...
JERRY JONES

And Warner Bros. seems to be pretty much into re-releasing all of their catalog. So there's the ...
JERRY GARCIA

When I gave up law to go into real estate, my mother said, 'How can you give up the law?' Bu...
JERRY REINSDORF

When I bought the team, I wasn't thinking about a new arena. But obviously I'm very proud of...
JERRY REINSDORF

Scanadu is right at the heart of the next generation of computing, which combines mobility, sensors,...
JERRY YANG

I have no interest in gender or race or anything like that. But everyone else is kind of, with their...
JERRY SEINFELD

'The Night Cafe' and 'The Starry Night' still emit such pathos, density, and intensi...
JERRY SALTZ

I really am glad that the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children has had the cou...
JERRY HALL

Recycling, packaging, businesses are changing all of those things because that's what consumers ...
JERRY GREENFIELD

The worst way of flying, I think, is standby. It never works. That's why they call it standby. Y...
JERRY SEINFELD

Pension reform can be hard to talk about. In the long run, reform now means fewer demands for layoff...
JERRY BROWN

When it's the caliber of fight that Canelo Alvarez and Liam Smith is, that's a big deal, and...
JERRY JONES

The things that are happening to me are unbelievable. I'm actually busier right now than when I ...
JERRY RICE

I can tell you, I grew up with great coaching, and it had nothing to do with sports. I had great par...
JERRY JONES

I call it like I see it. I don't hold back when it comes to being candid on the hot issues.
JERRY DOYLE

When the purse strings tighten up at museums, the institutions usually cut back and cancel shows. Th...
JERRY SALTZ

Just as Pollock used the drip to meld process and product, Richter 'found' and used the smud...
JERRY SALTZ

'Hound Dog' took like twelve minutes. That's not a complicated piece of work. But the rh...
JERRY LEIBER

The State of Israel has faced obstacles and challenges to its very survival, with conventional milit...
JERRY COSTELLO

Startups are often very undercapitalised, but I found that to be very beneficial because it forces y...
JERRY GREENFIELD

I think that N.W.A. picked up where Bobby Kennedy and Martin Luther King would have gone if they had...
JERRY HELLER

Prosperity is living easily and happily in the real world, whether you have money or not.
JERRY GELLIS

Making a million dollars is the simplest thing in the world. Just find a product that sells for $200...
JERRY GILLIES

MoMA is one of the world's great cultural institutions with one of the world's premier Board...
JERRY SPEYER

The tax code can be used to eliminate the toll booths on the information superhighway.
JERRY WELLER

The first memory I have was my sisters dancing to the radio when they played records by Benny Goodma...
JERRY LEIBER

You can never be happily married to another until you get a divorce from yourself. A successful marr...
JERRY MCCANT

I discovered the Clash, the Pistols, obviously the Ramones, Blondie.
JERRY ONLY

We were watching bands like the Ramones and Blondie and other bands beginning to ignite.
JERRY ONLY

My long, blonde hair has been my trademark ever since I started modelling in the Seventies, when I w...
JERRY HALL

If you're not a born-again Christian, you're a failure as a human being.
JERRY FALWELL

Prosperity is living easily and happily in the real world, whether you have money or not.
JERRY GELLIS

If God had an agent, the world wouldn't be built yet. It'd only be about Thursday.
JERRY REYNOLDS

I know it's dangerous to take on bloggers. They can go after you every day, all day long, and an...
JERRY SALTZ

People come to me with their passion about transportation, about education, about health care, about...
JERRY MCNERNEY

You be you and I'll be me, today and today and today, and let's trust the future to tomorrow. Let th...
JERRY SPINELLI

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?
JERRY SEINFELD

It's in the morning, for most of us. It's that time, those few seconds when we're coming out of slee...
JERRY SPINELLI

Somebody just gave me a shower radio. Thanks a lot. Do you really want music in the shower? I guess ...
JERRY SEINFELD

Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the othe...
JERRY SEINFELD

Our worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's grace. And your best days are...
JERRY BRIDGES

I've had great success being a total idiot.
JERRY LEWIS

Do not get attatched to the world as it is. Because the world is changing something new is coming.
JERRY WEINTRAUB

When a stargirl cries, she sheds not tears but light.
JERRY SPINELLI

Most men act so tough and strong on the outside because on the inside, we are scared, weak, and frag...
JERRY RUBIN

I have made decisions that turned out to be wrong, and went back and did it another way, and still t...
JERRY GILLIES

It doesn't matter what I say as long as I sound different from other politicians.
JERRY BROWN

Make sure you visualize what you really want, not what someone else wants for you.
JERRY GILLIES

And when it rains on your parade, look up rather than down. Without the rain, there would be no rain...
JERRY CHIN

Confidence is a lot of this game or any game. If you don't think you can, you won't.
JERRY WEST

When the game is over it is really just beginning.
JERRY KRAMER

When you have them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.
JERRY MARTIN

I was in the drug store the other day trying to get a cold medication...
Not easy. There's an ent...
JERRY SEINFELD

Constantly choosing the lesser of two evils is still choosing evil.
JERRY GARCIA

You will recognize your own path when you come upon it, because you will suddenly have all the energ...
JERRY GILLIES

The government is becoming the family of last resort.
JERRY BROWN

It takes a lot more energy to fail than to succeed, since it takes a lot of concentrated energy to h...
JERRY GILLIES

People hate me because I am a multifaceted, talented, wealthy, internationally famous genius.
JERRY LEWIS

You do not merely want to be considered just the best of the best. You want to be considered the onl...
JERRY GARCIA

Confront your fears, list them, get to know them, and only then will you be able to put them aside a...
JERRY GILLIES

I'm shopping around for something to do that no one will like.
JERRY GARCIA

Profitability doesn't happen when you're walking on bullshit.
JERRY MARTIN

Inaction may be the biggest form of action.
JERRY BROWN

For me, the lame part of the Sixties was the political part, the social part. The real part was the ...
JERRY GARCIA

The more you love what you are doing, the more successful it will be for you.
JERRY GILLIES

What you do is more important than how much you make, and how you feel about it is more important th...
JERRY GILLIES

Nobody stopped thinking about those psychedelic experiences. Once you've been to some of those place...
JERRY GARCIA

Prisons don't rehabilitate, they don't punish, they don't protect, so what the hell do they do?
JERRY BROWN

By the end, everybody had a label -- pig, liberal, radical, revolutionary ... If you had everything ...
JERRY RUBIN

It's a morbid observation, but if every one on earth just stopped breathing for an hour, the greenho...
JERRY ADLER

Too often, we say we are defeated by this or that sin. No, we are not defeated. We are simply disobe...
JERRY BRIDGES

The backseat produced the sexual revolution.
JERRY RUBIN

Too often I find that the volume of paper expands to fill the available briefcases.
JERRY BROWN

According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death i...
JERRY SEINFELD

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits th...
JERRY SEINFELD

Most men act so tough and strong on the outside because on the inside, we are scared, weak, and fr...
JERRY RUBIN

A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.
JERRY SEINFELD

Destroy your life; then put it back together.You'll get great material, meet some fascinating charac...
JERRY STAHL

AIDS is not just God's punishment for homosexuals; it is God's punishment for the society th...
JERRY FALWELL

We need to make sure the Department of Agriculture is promoting farmers and ranchers.
JERRY MORAN

I'm going to keep thinking about topping myself every time. I can say very confidently that Alic...
JERRY CANTRELL

'Home Alone' was a movie, not an alibi.
JERRY ORBACH

A metaphysical tour de force of untethered meaning and involuting interlocking contrapuntal rhythms,...
JERRY SALTZ

Not to say people shouldn't get rich from art. I adore the alchemy wherein artists who cast a co...
JERRY SALTZ

Success has a lot to do with luck, but it also involves a lot of real hard work. The thing about suc...
JERRY CANTRELL

Adrenaline is so strong that none of us understand it.
JERRY LEWIS

I am such a strong admirer and supporter of George W. Bush that if he suggested eliminating the inco...
JERRY FALWELL

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fit...
JERRY SEINFELD

Australia was great. I would advise anybody to go there. In fact, if you couldn't live here, Aus...
JERRY LAWLER

They'd have to force me to take the All-Star Game. They take over the building, your season-tick...
JERRY REINSDORF

Stuff that's hidden and murky and ambiguous is scary because you don't know what it does.
JERRY GARCIA

Montana and I had a chemistry that was unbelievable. When I first came into the league he told me I ...
JERRY RICE

I don't think that McMahon thinks very much about the fact that J.R and I have been successful. ...
JERRY LAWLER

Anne is very forgiving. She doesn't care about money, being rich, or clothes. We never argued ab...
JERRY STILLER

To me it was never about what I accomplished on the football field, it was about the way I played th...
JERRY RICE

I don't like to be rushed. I plan my outfits for the week in advance. I find the appropriate out...
JERRY HALL

I like wearing my wedding ring, it's nice.
JERRY O'CONNELL

If I found the cure for dystrophy tomorrow, I would do a telethon in four weeks for acute pain that ...
JERRY LEWIS

Only an artist as preternaturally acute and copacetic, as oddly visionary and just odd as Richard Ar...
JERRY SALTZ

I get very nervous when I have to take my wedding ring off.
JERRY O'CONNELL

Teams that consistently perform at the highest levels are able to come together and be unified acros...
JERRY REINSDORF

The alternate media are becoming important and viable alternatives to playing live. Records, videos,...
JERRY GARCIA

Part of the healing process is sharing with other people who care.
JERRY CANTRELL

It's really important for children to have good morals and good manners, and that they're th...
JERRY HALL

When comics came along in the 1930s there was a talent pool waiting. And one reason is so many areas...
JERRY ROBINSON

Through these adversities, Israel has endured with continued strength, conviction, and faith.
JERRY COSTELLO

The giant white cube is now impeding rather than enhancing the rhythms of art. It preprograms a view...
JERRY SALTZ

You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if...
JERRY SEINFELD

Companies such as Microsoft, Cisco and Intel were just starting at their 10-year anniversary.
JERRY YANG

When you're in comedy, people always come up and say, 'Oh, it must be so hard.' It reall...
JERRY SEINFELD

I think it's funny to be delicate with subjects that are explosive.
JERRY SEINFELD

Make no mistake about why these babies are here - they are here to replace us.
JERRY SEINFELD

That's the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.
JERRY SEINFELD

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.
JERRY SEINFELD

I don't want to hear the specials. If they're so special, put 'em on the menu.
JERRY SEINFELD

The IRS! They're like the Mafia, they can take anything they want!
JERRY SEINFELD

Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on...
JERRY SEINFELD

When I jumped off a roof in Cannes in a bee costume, I looked ridiculous. But this is my business; I...
JERRY SEINFELD

You have to motivate yourself with challenges. That's how you know you're still alive.
JERRY SEINFELD

Marriage is like a game of chess except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and...
JERRY SEINFELD

Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.
JERRY SEINFELD

Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV.
JERRY SEINFELD

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.
JERRY SEINFELD

The Four Levels of Comedy: Make your friends laugh, Make strangers laugh, Get paid to make strangers...
JERRY SEINFELD

To me, if life boils down to one thing, it's movement. To live is to keep moving.
JERRY SEINFELD

My theory is 98 percent of all human endeavor is killing time.
JERRY SEINFELD

I am so busy doing nothing... that the idea of doing anything - which as you know, always leads to s...
JERRY SEINFELD

We want to do a lot of stuff; we're not in great shape. We didn't get a good night's sle...
JERRY SEINFELD

Pay attention, don't let life go by you. Fall in love with the back of your cereal box.
JERRY SEINFELD

Summer is a great time to visit art museums, which offer the refreshing rinse of swimming pools - on...
JERRY SALTZ

Ideas come from ordinary, everyday life. And from imagination. And from feelings. And from memories....
JERRY SPINELLI

You look at Superman, the story of an orphan coming to America, keeping his identity secret and even...
JERRY ROBINSON

After 1909, Monet drastically enlarged his brushstrokes, disintegrated his images, and broke through...
JERRY SALTZ

Hollywood never knew there was a Vietnam War until they made the movie.
JERRY STILLER

Ice cream is the perfect buffer, because you can do things in a somewhat lighthearted way. Plus, peo...
JERRY GREENFIELD

I went to Gettysburg College, where the famous Civil War battle was fought. I majored in English. I ...
JERRY SPINELLI

I enjoy life, and I think that's important. Life is so fragile and so fleeting, and it's ove...
JERRY HALL

I believe in financial retirement. I don't necessarily believe in physical retirement.
JERRY DOYLE

Businesses typically look at issues like price, quality, time of delivery. They don't often thin...
JERRY GREENFIELD

There's no better feeling than making your little girls laugh.
JERRY O'CONNELL

I have a loyalty that runs in my bloodstream, when I lock into someone or something, you can't g...
JERRY LEWIS

I think my fans would probably be surprised to know I'm not insane - I'm not a crazy person ...
JERRY TRAINOR

My guitar is a mutation between a classic Fender Stratocaster guitar, which I played for years, and ...
JERRY GARCIA

As we approached each other, the noise and the students around us melted away and we were utterly al...
JERRY SPINELLI

I mean, just because you're a musician doesn't mean all your ideas are about music. So every...
JERRY GARCIA

Chris Ofili's suave, stippled, visually tricked-out paintings of the nineties, with their allove...
JERRY SALTZ

I almost resent being Charley Moviestar. Yeah, I'm grateful. But it takes me away from my kids.
JERRY LEWIS

I don't plan out my visits rigorously, but I do have a list of about 125 New York galleries, alt...
JERRY SALTZ

In November, 1964 when I was a patient at the Mayo Clinic I though seriously about killing myself.
JERRY KRAMER

I have this old '57 Porsche Speedster, and the way the door closes, I'll just sit there and ...
JERRY SEINFELD

Artschwager's art always involves looking closely at surfaces, questions what an object is, want...
JERRY SALTZ

Damien Hirst is the Elvis of the English art world, its ayatollah, deliverer, and big-thinking entre...
JERRY SALTZ

It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world if we didn't have a salary cap.
JERRY JONES

Red-hot songs were born on the black streets of Baltimore, where I delivered five-gallon cans of ker...
JERRY LEIBER

I'm a fan of very, very expensive creams: Creme de la Mer, La Prairie Skin Caviar Luxe. I'm ...
JERRY HALL

My greatest moment as a jock occurred when I was 14 and playing punch ball in front of my house on A...
JERRY REINSDORF

The support this city and our fans have shown the Grizzlies made my decision to stay in Memphis an e...
JERRY WEST

Where Cezanne captured and intensified shards of the eternal (every pear far more sharply defined th...
JERRY SALTZ

From 1936 on, I have taken more falls than any other 20 comedians put together. From the time I was ...
JERRY LEWIS

You need lofty goals. Then cement it with a great work ethic.
JERRY WEST

All of us, whether or not we're celebrities, every one ought to spend part of their life making ...
JERRY SPRINGER

The idea of getting old is horrific, but I don't want to make it worse by becoming a grotesque c...
JERRY HALL

I think the cartoons that they're children are watching, particularly 'The Simpsons,' th...
JERRY LEWIS

It's just a show. It's not the end of Western Civilization. It's chewing gum.
JERRY SPRINGER

If Chief Justice Warren and his associates had known God's word and had desired to do the Lord&#...
JERRY FALWELL

I'm really looking forward to the Hall of Fame ceremonies. It's going to be unbelievable - j...
JERRY RICE

The new album is a childhood dream come true. Got to sing with Ronnie Spector, got to cover a bunch ...
JERRY ONLY

Crankiness is at the essence of all comedy. My wife and I were discussing the different types of cra...
JERRY SEINFELD

Being a good husband is like being a good stand-up comic - you need ten years before you can even ca...
JERRY SEINFELD

College was especially sweet because of the positive, hopeful atmosphere of a college campus.
JERRY KRAMER

Megacollectors suppose they can enter art history by spending astronomical amounts.
JERRY SALTZ

I always assumed the Department of Agriculture was the farmer and rancher's friend.
JERRY MORAN

So once I thought of the villain with a sense of humor, I began to think of a name and the name &quo...
JERRY ROBINSON

So, I'm thinking of a name for a villain that has a sense of humor. I thought of 'The Joker&...
JERRY ROBINSON

My job is not babysitting people; my job is focusing on making the best band I possibly can.
JERRY ONLY

The young man who's had the Guggenheim fortune behind him all his life - he can hire all the aut...
JERRY LEWIS

As I made my way through 'On Line,' the austere, stridently dogmatic, sometimes revelatory e...
JERRY SALTZ

You come to our stadium and look at the aura of 100,000 people. You look up there and see an Army ta...
JERRY JONES

Men we drive ourselves crazy. Men always want to marry a virgin, but during the act of sex on the wedding night we tell the women to say 'you're the best, you're the best', then afterwards we wonder better than who?

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Jerry Seinfield

Men we drive ourselves crazy. Men always want to marry a virgin, but during the act of sex on the wedding night we tell the women to say 'you're the best, you're the best', then afterwards we wonder better than who?

Jerry Seinfield

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