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Mark Twain quote: "I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell-you see, I have friends in both places."
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I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell-you see, I have friends in both places.


Mark Twain


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I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell -- you see, I have friends in both places.
MARK TWAIN I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places
MARK TWAIN I don't like to commit myself about Heaven and Hell, you see, I have friends in both places.
MARK TWAIN I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
MARK TWAIN It is good to have some friends both in heaven and hell.
GEORGE HERBERT It's a good idea to have friends both in Heaven and in Hell.
EDWARD ALBEE Bob Hope, like Mark Twain, had a sense of humor that was uniquely American, and like Twain, we'll li...
DICK VAN DYKE Bob Hope, like Mark Twain, had a sense of humor that was uniquely American, and like Twain, we'l...
DICK VAN DYKE I don’t need to go to heaven or hell. I have been both places and always wanted more. I will settl...
SHANNON L. ALDER I, Mark Twain being of sound mind, have spent everything
MARK TWAIN I grew up reading Shakespeare and Mark Twain.
JACKSON BROWNE Aye, well, I've got my garden.
LIKE I I told my Nike representative, 'Why didn't you guys use me for this?''' Williams said, laughing.
LIKE I On the interception, I was out of bounds,
LIKE I casually made his 'abort black fetuses' argument.
LIKE I I can field my position. If I start worrying about being ready for a line drive too soon that means ...
LIKE I I told him that he played a great game,'' said Falcons quarterback Michael Vick , who like Manning w...
LIKE I I was so concerned with getting the ball out of my hands and not taking the sack, that sometimes I t...
LIKE I I knew I had to throw the ball better,'' Manning said of his poor start.
LIKE I I think the reason that I have that title or that moniker is because people don't know what to expec...
LIKE I You're either ready and prepared to take on the task, or you're not,'' he said.
LIKE I I did not have one butterfly out there today,'' he said.
LIKE I Married to the Mob.
LIKE I Hello you're with Drudge.
LIKE I I don't expect Christian Fundamentalists to reach out to me. They are adamant that homosexuals are i...
LIKE I throw enough shit at the wall and some should stick?
LIKE I I'm not happy, that's all I can say about it,'' he said.
LIKE I Hell will be Heaven with Friends, Heaven will be Hell without them.
AMAN JASSAL Mark Twain.
FRIENDS If you want to meet Mark Twain, all you have to do is use your brain!
STEVE RAY COLLINS Right from the start, I loved the works of Mark Twain. Every time I read about Tom Sawyer, I'd g...
JOHN GRISHAM You have been to hell, Ketut?"
He smiled. Of course he's been there.
What's it like in hel...
ELIZABETH GILBERT I sing about heaven and hell, angels and demons.
NINA HAGEN Hell is in the here and now. So is heaven. Quit worrying about hell or dreaming about heaven, as the...
ELIF SHAFAK Адът е тук и сега. Раят също. Престани да се плашиш от ад...
ELIF SHAFAK Mark Twain: A Life
RON POWERS Even heaven would become hell if you were alone in it, or away from a loved one. And even if you wer...
SUZY KASSEM I bought a book of Mark Twain quotes. That's about my speed. I'll read a couple quotes and p...
KID ROCK You cant live champagne life,if you cant buy beer.
I DONT KNOW What I'm having is this conflict in my life right now, that in New York, I see my directing frie...
DANNY PINTAURO Mark Twain cannot be defined.
HAL HOLBROOK If there is a heaven and hell, then I wonder, are the people in heaven asking god to forgive and sto...
JASON BOURKE I asked, "You mean, you might as well spend your life going upward, through the happy places, since ...
ELIZABETH GILBERT I believe in a packed Heaven and an empty Hell.
PAT BUCKLEY We absolutely believed in Heaven and Hell, Purgatory, and even Limbo. I mean, they were actually clo...
JOHN MCGAHERN I agree with what Mark Twain said - we're all mad at night.
RUTH RENDELL I first read 'Tom Sawyer' when I was in 8th grade, 13 years old. I realised since that Mark ...
JEFF NICHOLS Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you...
MARK TWAIN I read from Mark Twain's lips one or two of his good stories. He has his own way of thinking, saying...
HELEN KELLER His head was an hour-glass; it could stow an idea, but it had to do it a grain at a time, not the wh...
MARK TWAIN You see, Squirt, there's heaven, and then there's hell. Hell is where they send all the bad people, ...
BROOKE DAVIS Christianity supplies a Hell for the people who disagree with you and a Heaven for your friends
ELBERT HUBBARD Christianity supplies a Hell for the people who disagree with you and a Heaven for your friends.
ELBERT HUBBARD Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer."

[Mark...
MARK TWAIN To paraphrase Mark Twain, our demise is greatly exaggerated.
CHRIS DONLAY I love you like the devil loves his pitchfork. I love you like the angel loves his wings. I love you...
ROBERT THIER THE DEVIL. As far as I went, yes. But I will now go further, and confess to you that men get tired o...
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW If it wasn't for the Mark Twain Masquers, I don't know where my life would have gone.
PETER FALK The specific 'heaven' you 'go to' is built upon what you believe and the hell you can descend to is ...
ALAN B JONES Do all things possible to be recognized by Heaven, for that is the true noble thing!
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH I keep seeing myself in my daughter, and I see my mother in me and in her. Bloody hell.
JULIE WALTERS Mark Twain and I are in the same position. We have put things in such a way as to make people, who w...
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW When you find that you are on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect." Mark Twain
STEVE J. LEATHERWOOD Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most [borrowed from Mark Twain]
GERARD WAY A hypocritical businessman, whose fortune had been the misfortune of many others, told Mark Twain pi...
MARK TWAIN How long does it take man to realize that he cannot want what he wants? You have to live in hell to ...
WILLIAM S. BURROUGHS The frontier between hell and heaven is only the difference between two ways of looking at things.
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW Neither Heaven nor Hell are far from routine. The biggest danger lies in the perception of the proxi...
GARY RUDZ Before you reach heaven, you have to walk through hell.
SARA STRAIN I have always wanted to know what I couldnt see, I always wanted to know what I still cannot see, ye...
M.AREEB RIAZ The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do wh...
MARK TWAIN Do I believe in Heaven and Hell? I do, we have them here; the world is nothing else.
JOHN DAVIDSON Conservatism is the blind and fear-filled worship of dead radicals.
MARK TWAIN Human beings can be awful cruel to one another.
MARK TWAIN The highest perfection of politeness is only a beautiful edifice, built, from the base to the dome, ...
MARK TWAIN Lately, I have come to believe that the principal difference between heaven and hell is the company ...
LOIS MCMASTER BUJOLD I have nightmares about hell, where all I do is add up numbers and try to have conversations with pe...
JIM BUTCHER Mark Twain was a great traveler and he wrote three or four great travel books. I wouldn't say th...
PAUL THEROUX Our heaven is their hell, said God. I like a balanced universe.
MARGARET ATWOOD Me miserable! Which way shall I fly
Infinite wrath and infinite despair?
Which way I fly i...
JOHN MILTON Mark Twain is as big as America. He really is.
VAL KILMER I see no faults in the Church, and therefore let me be resurrected with the Saints, whether I ascend...
JOSEPH SMITH, JR. LIFE IS LIKE A JOURNEY TO HEAVEN AND HELL.
BRIGHT OWUSU AMPONSAH Heaven and Hell are within you. Choose wisely or to hell with you!
TAPAN GHOSH I don't believe in an afterlife, so I don't have to spend my whole life fearing hell, or fearing hea...
ISAAC ASIMOV Sir Thomas More was a victim of injustice and irony. Generously and meekly, just as he was about to ...
NEAL A. MAXWELL When thou ascendest to thy Heaven I descend to my Hell—even then thou callest to me across the unb...
KAHLIL GIBRAN "You don't believe in God? You're going to Hell!" As an Atheist, what makes you think that I care wh...
RYAN B LUNDQUIST I have no fear of photography as long as it cannot be used in heaven and in hell.
EDVARD MUNCH I love him to hell and back and heaven and back, and have and do and will
SYLVIA PLATH Never have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
MARK TWAIN A conspiracy is nothing but a secret agreement of a number of men for the pursuance of policies whic...
OSSIP GABRILOWITSCH Aging is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
ANONYMOUS Honesty: The best of all the lost arts.
MARK TWAIN You can find in a text whatever you bring, if you will stand between it and the mirror of you imagin...
MARK TWAIN If you hold a cat by the tail, you learn things you can't learn any other way.--Mark Twain
TONY-PAUL DE VISSAGE I'm really totally convinced, and I can't predict the time frame, but someday these cartoonists, lik...
BRIAN WALKER All our troubles begin when we break life up into segments and see things fragmentarily. No, all pla...
OSHO There's a tremendous difference between alone and lonely. You could be lonely in a group of peop...
DREW BARRYMORE people dont know you till they meet you. dont smile if you dont want to, dont be a false person, don...
CAROLINA JANETTE GOMEZ GONZALEZ

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Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
MARK TWAIN My books are like water; those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.
MARK TWAIN Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - either by themselves or by others.
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MARK TWAIN The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed rig...
MARK TWAIN There is no distinctly American criminal class - except Congress.
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MARK TWAIN The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.
MARK TWAIN All generalizations are false, including this one.
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MARK TWAIN Let us endeavor so to live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
MARK TWAIN I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
MARK TWAIN Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
MARK TWAIN If I owned half of that dog, I would shoot my half.
MARK TWAIN What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed ...
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MARK TWAIN The teacher reminded us that Romes liberties were not auctioned off in a day, but were bought slowly...
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MARK TWAIN Say the report is exaggerated.
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MARK TWAIN I think I can say, and say with pride, that we have some legislatures that bring higher prices than ...
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MARK TWAIN Life does not consist mainly, or even largely, of facts and happenings. It consists mainly of the st...
MARK TWAIN Annihilation has no terrors for me, because I have already tried it before I was born --a hundred mi...
MARK TWAIN Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is, knows how deep a debt of gratitude we owe to...
MARK TWAIN We never become really and genuinely our entire and honest selves until we are dead -- and not then ...
MARK TWAIN Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
MARK TWAIN All say, How hard it is that we have to die -- a strange complaint to come from the mouths of people...
MARK TWAIN Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find...
MARK TWAIN Write without pay until somebody offers to pay you. If nobody offers within three years, sawing wood...
MARK TWAIN As to the adjective, when in doubt strike it out.
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MARK TWAIN The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do wh...
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MARK TWAIN Man is the only animal that blushes - or needs to.
MARK TWAIN Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting...
MARK TWAIN To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.
MARK TWAIN Between us, we cover all knowledge; he knows all that can be known and I know the rest.
MARK TWAIN The church is always trying to get other people to reform; it might not be a bad idea to reform itse...
MARK TWAIN Stars are good too. I wish I could get some to put in my hair. But I suppose I never can. You would ...
MARK TWAIN There are German songs which can make a stranger to the language cry.
MARK TWAIN The trouble with the world is not that people know too little, but that they know so many things tha...
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MARK TWAIN Distance lends enchantment to the view
MARK TWAIN Be good and you will be lonesome.
MARK TWAIN Chastity - you can carry it too far
MARK TWAIN To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is nobler--and less trouble.
MARK TWAIN Most writers regard truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are most economical in it...
MARK TWAIN Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't.
MARK TWAIN When you cannot get a compliment in any other way pay yourself one.
MARK TWAIN There is nothing you can say in answer to a compliment. I have been complimented myself a great many...
MARK TWAIN Never learn to do anything. If you don't learn, you will always find someone else to do it for you.
MARK TWAIN I can't do literary work for the rest of this year because I'm meditating another lawsuit and lookin...
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MARK TWAIN Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which, before their union, were not perceived to have any relati...
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MARK TWAIN If man had created man, he would be ashamed of his performance.
MARK TWAIN There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.
MARK TWAIN The human race was always interesting and we know by its past that it will always continue so, monot...
MARK TWAIN Man is a creature made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.
MARK TWAIN Such is the human race. Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat...
MARK TWAIN It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts th...
MARK TWAIN Of all the various kinds of sexual intercourse, this has the least to recommend it. As an amusement,...
MARK TWAIN Scientists have odious manners, except when you prop up their theory; then you can borrow money of t...
MARK TWAIN Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.
MARK TWAIN Man is the only creature who has a nasty mind.
MARK TWAIN We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks, if we agree with him.
MARK TWAIN O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover th...
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MARK TWAIN There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one: keep from telling their happiness to...
MARK TWAIN I repeat, sir, that in whatever position you place a woman she is an ornament to society and a treas...
MARK TWAIN Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life. The conviction of the rich...
MARK TWAIN Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide i...
MARK TWAIN Let us be grateful to Adam, our benefactor. He cut us out of the blessing of idleness and won for us...
MARK TWAIN Intellectual work is misnamed; it is a pleasure, a dissipation, and is its own highest reward.
MARK TWAIN Work and play are words used to describe the same thing under differing conditions.
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MARK TWAIN Often the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.
MARK TWAIN Truth is neither alive nor dead; it just aggravates itself all the time.
MARK TWAIN No real gentleman will tell the naked truth in the presence of ladies.
MARK TWAIN We had the sky up there, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss whether th...
MARK TWAIN Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True ...
MARK TWAIN When you ascend the hill of prosperity, may you not meet a friend.
MARK TWAIN Prosperity is the surest breeder of insolence I know.
MARK TWAIN Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.
MARK TWAIN We need not worry so much about what man descends from; it's what he descends to that shames the hum...
MARK TWAIN There's always something about your success that displeases even your best friends.
MARK TWAIN I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- except he...
MARK TWAIN There was never a century nor a country that was short of experts who knew the Deity's mind and were...
MARK TWAIN People are much more willing to lend you books than bookcases.
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MARK TWAIN A big leather-bound volume makes an ideal razor strap. A thin book is useful to stick under a table ...
MARK TWAIN When the doctrine of allegiance to party can utterly up-end a man's moral constitution and make a te...
MARK TWAIN In statesmanship get the formalities right, never mind about the moralities.
MARK TWAIN Fleas can be taught nearly anything that a Congressman can.
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MARK TWAIN His money is twice tainted: taint yours and taint mine.
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MARK TWAIN Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run. Traini...
MARK TWAIN We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any in the world; and its efficiency is only m...
MARK TWAIN There are many scapegoats for our sins, but the most popular is providence.
MARK TWAIN It is by the goodness of God that we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech...
MARK TWAIN There isn't a single human characteristic that can be safely labeled as American.
MARK TWAIN War talk by men who have been in a war is always interesting; whereas moon talk by a poet who has no...
MARK TWAIN There comes a time in every rightly constructed boy's life when he has a raging desire to go somewhe...
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MARK TWAIN Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself
MARK TWAIN When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man aro...
MARK TWAIN Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
MARK TWAIN It was the schoolboy who said, Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
MARK TWAIN Never let formal education get in the way of your learning.
MARK TWAIN There is nothing training cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. It can turn bad morals to good; it ...
MARK TWAIN I've never let my school interfere with my education.
MARK TWAIN In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in al...
MARK TWAIN Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect).
MARK TWAIN If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal di...
MARK TWAIN A person that started in to carry a cat home by the tail was getting knowledge that was always going...
MARK TWAIN Man is the Reasoning Animal. Such is the claim. I think it is open to dispute. Indeed, my experiment...
MARK TWAIN Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the ca...
MARK TWAIN If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the r...
MARK TWAIN The Bible has noble poetry in it... and some good morals and a wealth of obscenity, and upwards of a...
MARK TWAIN Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are economical in its...
MARK TWAIN The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
MARK TWAIN Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the reall...
MARK TWAIN If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.
MARK TWAIN ′Classic′ - a book which people praise and don't read.
MARK TWAIN Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination.
MARK TWAIN I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
MARK TWAIN The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.
MARK TWAIN Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Trut...
MARK TWAIN Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
MARK TWAIN A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
MARK TWAIN All right, then, I'll go to hell.
MARK TWAIN The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man's.
MARK TWAIN Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
MARK TWAIN If Christ were here there is one thing he would not be—a Christian.
MARK TWAIN To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.
MARK TWAIN Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of joy you must have somebody to divide it ...
MARK TWAIN Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.
MARK TWAIN Education: the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.
MARK TWAIN Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
MARK TWAIN I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.
MARK TWAIN

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