The fact that my sexual awakening peripherally involves Steve Guttenberg I have gradually accepted.


Gary Shteyngart

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There's nothing wrong with her except she's completely fucked up.
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Do not throw away your heart. Keep your heart. Your heart is all that matters ... Throw away your an...
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If you stop thinking, if you stop wondering, you die.
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Remember this... develop a sense of nostalgia for something, or you'll never figure out what's impor...
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By reading this message you are denying its existence and implying consent.
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My mother cranes her neck. Her ability to be fascinated by things is her best gift to me.
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From the moment I bought my ticket, I had a premonition I wasn’t returning to New York anytime soo...
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There's no present left. This is the problem for a novelist. [The problem] is the present is gone. W...
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People who think literature should be Serious—should serve as a blueprint for a rocket that will n...
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The goal of politics is to make us children. The more heinous the system the more this is true. The ...
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Just don’t write like a self -hating Jew,” my father is whispering into my ear.
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The simple trill of her laugh has not declined over the years; if anything it's been buffeted by her...
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Every moment I have ever experienced as a child is as important as every moment I am experiencing no...
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I am a kind of joke, but the question is: which kind? My job is to keep everyone guessing.
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After all, this is America, and you can swap out the parts of yourself that don't work. You can rebu...
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You are not what you want. You are what wants you back.
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I am not good with others.
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I want to be loved so badly, it verges on mild insanity.
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As every so-called creative spirit soon learns, the rest of the world doesn't particularly give a da...
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She folds the pages of the books she reads when she wants to remember something important. Her favor...
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I write because there is nothing as joyful as writing, even when the writing is twisted and full of ...
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One of the things that I'm really proud of is that I have really good timing. It's very easy...
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I influence anybody who is able to get through the chaos of my first impression.
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Keep yourself motivated. You've got to be motivated, you've got to wake up every day and und...
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If there were no government-guaranteed student loans, college tuition would be much lower.
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You can be the moon and still be jealous of the stars.
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Somebody said they threw their copy of Dungeons and Dragons into the fire, and it screamed. It's...
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The more aware of your intentions and your experiences you become, the more you will be able to conn...
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A spiritual partnership is between people who promise themselves to use all of their experiences to ...
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The fondest dream of the information age is to create an archive of all knowledge. You might call it...
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For all their expertise at figuring out how things work, technical people are often painfully aware ...
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Beefs against debt collectors are consistently among the top complaints received by both the FTC and...
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When the Securities & Exchange Commission settled securities-fraud charges against Richard Harri...
GARY WEISS
George Soros is one of the few characters from the world of finance who deserves to be called larger...
GARY WEISS
India may be the only country in the world that has been free of anti-Semitic prejudice throughout i...
GARY WEISS
People are told their rights when they're arrested. Consumers getting collection letters are ent...
GARY WEISS
With such enormous bucks devoted to trading in oil and other commodities, the distortions that they ...
GARY WEISS
Even a casual reader of the financial pages knows that microcaps are a perennial headache for regula...
GARY WEISS
Mutual funds dare to be average. In fact, they dare to be lousy. They have long since ceased strivin...
GARY WEISS
I've met Dick Syron. I like the guy. He's a man's man kind of character, a real charmer,...
GARY WEISS
Indians are sometimes accused of being condescending toward Westerners and of being excessively prea...
GARY WEISS
The flip side of humiliation is pride.
GARY WEISS
Humiliating events have a way of capturing the public's imagination. So it has been since antiqu...
GARY WEISS
Some hedge fund managers have made big bucks trading oil futures - George Soros is one.
GARY WEISS
In the U.S., diversity is a politically correct slogan. In India, it is a historical fact. Much as w...
GARY WEISS
Excessive hype, bankruptcy, cash burning like autumn leaves - such is the stuff of short-selling.
GARY WEISS
One problem with the focus on speculation is that it tends to promote the growth of the great intell...
GARY WEISS
You can't believe the government - on anything. And you especially can't believe them when t...
GARY WEBB
After spending three years of my life looking into this, I am more convinced than ever that the U.S....
GARY WEBB
Beaujolais is so underrated.
GARY VAYNERCHUK
Nobody walks this earth thinking he's better than I think I am - I think I'm great. At the s...
GARY VAYNERCHUK
Storytelling is the game. It's what we all do. It's why Nike is Nike, it's why Apple is ...
GARY VAYNERCHUK
The reason we love our parents is because they loved us first. Every single company should take this...
GARY VAYNERCHUK
Be reactionary. React to what the market wants. And the market wants one-on-one real time engagement...
GARY VAYNERCHUK
The world has changed - through technology, through wine-making techniques, the quality of wine is g...
GARY VAYNERCHUK
It's insane to me to ask anybody to be what they're not. Know what you know the best, love t...
GARY VAYNERCHUK
I love people, and the hustle.
GARY VAYNERCHUK
When I hear people debate the ROI of social media? It makes me remember why so many business fail. M...
GARY VAYNERCHUK
I am wired like a CEO and care a great deal about the bottom line, but I care about my customers eve...
GARY VAYNERCHUK
Stop doing things that waste time. Don't replace time with your family or things that you need t...
GARY VAYNERCHUK
The chef that grew up with the grandma who cooks tends to always beat the chef that went to the culi...
GARY VAYNERCHUK
My dad passed on asthma to me. It's kind of ironic because he outgrew it at 13.
GARY VALENTINE
The key in controlling my asthma is pretty simple: I have a good professional diagnosis, and I follo...
GARY VALENTINE
Asthma doesn't affect me, even though I have it. It can seem like it wants to act up a little if...
GARY VALENTINE
I love everything about playing for Newcastle, the club, the fans and the city.
GARY SPEED
I have won 85 caps and have had a great career with Wales and have enjoyed every minute of it.
GARY SPEED
Everyone tells me to play as long as you can. Sometimes, it goes in one ear and out the other.
GARY SPEED
If I had my time again and was able to change one thing from my career then I wouldn't have reti...
GARY SPEED
A lot of people still disregard something like yoga. I would have as a young player. I would have be...
GARY SPEED
If you've got aspirations to be a manager or coach, obviously coaching your country would be a g...
GARY SPEED
You've got to believe you can get a result from the game.
GARY SPEED
I think it's unfair to criticise someone for not being Welsh, but the smaller the nation, the mo...
GARY SPEED
Everyone I know is fervently proud to be Welsh but you try not to be preachy about it. It's diff...
GARY SPEED
Goal scoring is a recurring theme. If you aren't scoring then you aren't going to win games....
GARY SPEED
I started a theater called Steppenwolf. We've been very supportive of the veterans there.
GARY SINISE
I'm not like one of those actors who's a frustrated director.
GARY SINISE
I save money when I'm working so that I never have to take a role simply to pay the bills.
GARY SINISE
But I've got more to learn, too. I don't feel like I'm done or I know it all.
GARY SINISE
If you're missing three or four limbs, you have special challenges going forward. And the last t...
GARY SINISE
I'm thrilled I can make a living doing something I enjoy.
GARY SINISE
I can honestly say that I've done everything I've wanted to do, always. Not without difficul...
GARY SINISE
The chance to play a romantic character who kisses somebody onscreen was one of the elements that ma...
GARY SINISE
I do spend a lot of weekends on the road. I have to pace myself. It can be pretty busy, but I'm ...
GARY SINISE