When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson

They are each good when they are out, and each bad when they are in.

The more that learn to read the less learn how to make a living. That's one thing about a little education. It spoils you for actual work. The more you know the more you think somebody owes you a living.

I don't care how little your country is, you got a right to run it like you want to. When the big nations quit meddling then the world will have peace.

Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don't know when it's through if you are a crook or a martyr

It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.