We don't shoot somebody soon, I'm gonna forget how

Kakimi chertyami oni viigrali holodnuyu voinu?"
This translates roughly to: "How the hell did these people win the Cold War?

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night

When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried

I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to respect.