Men read maps better than women because only men can understand the concept of an inch equaling a hundred miles.

Know how to do anything - I’m a mom

It's okay to be fat. So you're fat. Just be fat and shut up about it.

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the bigger we are, the more space we'll take up, and the more we'll have to be reckoned with.

Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself.

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.