It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows.


Erma Bombeck

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It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows
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I have learned more from my mistakes than from my successes.
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What I hear you saying is that we should have gotten a fuel truck in the first place.
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You may have even an ex-wife or an ex-husband, but you can never have ex-children.
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I think we should have more than that.
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If you win without sacrifice you enjoy it but it's more satisfying when you have struggled.
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A child develops individuality long before he discovers taste
ERMA BOMBECK
Housework can kill you if done right
ERMA BOMBECK
People shop for a bathing suit with more care than they do a husband or wife. The rules are the same...
ERMA BOMBECK
I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: ''Checkout Ti...
ERMA BOMBECK
What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?
ERMA BOMBECK
The age of your children is a key factor in how quickly you are served in a restaurant. We once had ...
ERMA BOMBECK
If life is a bowl of cherries, then what am I doing in the pits?
ERMA BOMBECK
There's something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she's...
ERMA BOMBECK
Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown.
ERMA BOMBECK
The art of never making a mistake is crucial to motherhood. To be effective and to gain the respect ...
ERMA BOMBECK
Everyone is guilty at one time or another of throwing out questions that beg to be ignored, but moth...
ERMA BOMBECK
I've never vied for power in the family before. Pointing a box at the garage door and saying "Open!"...
ERMA BOMBECK
Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work...
ERMA BOMBECK
Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It's unbridled, it's unplanned...
ERMA BOMBECK
At some point in your life if you're lucky you throw practicality to the wind and start living.
ERMA BOMBECK
There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say, "Yes, I've got dreams, of course I've...
ERMA BOMBECK
Making coffee has become the great compromise of the decade. It's the only thing "real" men do that ...
ERMA BOMBECK
For years [my wedding ring] has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my ...
ERMA BOMBECK
Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.
ERMA BOMBECK
Girls mature faster than boys, cost more to raise, and statistics show that the old saw about girls ...
ERMA BOMBECK
If Life is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits?
ERMA BOMBECK
Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You're not out of it until...
ERMA BOMBECK
There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.
ERMA BOMBECK
One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of ...
ERMA BOMBECK
Before you try to keep up with the Joneses, be sure they're not trying to keep up with you.
ERMA BOMBECK
There is one thing I have never taught my body how to do and that is to figure out at 6 A.M. what it...
ERMA BOMBECK
I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.
ERMA BOMBECK
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
ERMA BOMBECK
How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?
ERMA BOMBECK
What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?
ERMA BOMBECK
Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue.
ERMA BOMBECK
As a child, my number one best friend was the librarian in my grade school. I actually believed all...
ERMA BOMBECK
You couldn't get me on Mars if it were the last place on earth.
ERMA COHEN
Companions were not allowed to lie. I don’t know why. I had tried a few times when I was young to ...
ERMA I TALAMANTE