I’d like to see more stand-up routines venture into depicting tragedy. It’s conventional to give people a humorous cathartic release; now I’d love to hear stand-up tragedy that would reduce the audience to exhausted tears.
Chuck Palahniuk
Related Stand up to injustice, even if you stand alone SUZY KASSEM The market is still waiting for HSBC results, which will have a big impact on the direction of the m... ANDREW TO Property shares had a technical rebound, but interest rate concerns will still affect properties unt... ANDREW TO Bank of China's results were quite good; double-digit growth can be taken as good results for a bank... ANDREW TO The index tried to challenge 18,000 but failed, so that triggered profit taking. Tokyo's slide also ... ANDREW TO Trading seems to be focusing on selective counters because investors are cautious amid interest rate... ANDREW TO We're seeing a minor technical rebound after Wall Street rebounded from two days of losses. The key ... ANDREW TO Some investors have returned to pick up the stock at bargain prices. ANDREW TO I think the take-up for the placement is not too good and other property developers may be discourag... ANDREW TO We are afraid that our freedoms and liberties will be infringed in the future. ANDREW TO I think there was some minor selling pressure on telecom stocks as the market continued to see a wea... ANDREW TO People know your tragedies and they treat you like you’re not human. Like you’re a three-h... ERIC JEROME DICKEY Everything happens for a reason. The daily tragedies and misfortunes are all meaningful events, lead... FUWA AIKA Penny rolled over, got to her feet, trying to get control of her scattered mind, but Quinn was behin... MICHAEL GRANT It goes back to Aristotle's idea that tragedy has a cathartic effect on the audience, ... The experi... BRIAN BREMEN I’d like to go out in the front yard and shout something. “None of this is worth it!” That’s... RAYMOND CARVER I’d like to say I’m not dressed up for anyone in particular, but that would be a lie. LISA DAILY There's something about doing stand-up that's cathartic. DAVE CHAPPELLE A Ritual to Read to Each Other If you don’t know the kind of person I am and... WILLIAM STAFFORD I kind of thought that stand-up comedy would suffer from the Internet because people seem to know mo... JERRY SEINFELD The saying sell all your belongings & give to the poor simply means "Redirect your mind to the verit... DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) They can't stand that a woman would give up men and like women. CRISTINA COMENCINI The hardest moment comes BEFORE you get started. #DontGiveUpNow MANI S. SIVASUBRAMANIAN I got into stand-up because I love stand-up. Specifically in stand-up, I love jokes. I love short, s... DEMETRI MARTIN To love means to be actively concerned for the life and the growth of another. IRVIN D. YALOM Lᴏᴠᴇ ɪs ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡɪɴᴅ ... Yᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ'ᴛ sᴇᴇ ɪᴛ, ʙᴜᴛ ʏᴏ... NICHOLAS SPARKS Congratulations, to the people which made gotham series, still need some more and extra work! DEYTH BANGER All I ever did to that apartment was hang fifty yards of yellow theatrical silk across the bedroom w... JOAN DIDION We can never make proper goodbyes. It was your last ride in a Checker cab and you had no warning. It... COLSON WHITEHEAD TAKE A STAND RIGHT NOW! BECAUSE tomorrow IS THE ONLY DAY OF THE WEEK THAT NEVER COMES!! PHILIP T. M. I’d allowed myself to feel love –yes, love– for another person in a way I’d once sworn to my... KATE AVERY ELLISON With stand-up, it's more interesting to hear about people's failures than their successes. AZIZ ANSARI If I knew that today would be the last time I’d see you, I would hug you tight and pray the Lord b... GABRIEL GARCíA MáRQUEZ Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is nev... A WALK TO REMEMBER I love doing stand-up, and the more you do outside of stand-up to raise your profile, the better you... ERIK GRIFFIN Friendship is a double-edged sword one side it can be great and true but the other side it spells be... GARY F EVANS... Time determines the occurrence of possibilities and impossibilities, but God determines the time for... ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH Get up, stand up, Stand up for your rights. Get up, stand up, Don't give up the fight. BOB MARLEY Yes. We say, but don't live up to it. KAYLA RAE I’m proud of you, son,” he said. “I guess it has finally sunk in that it’s important to stan... KAREN MUELLER COOMBS Eventually I came across another passage. This is what it said: I am not commanding you, but I ... NICHOLAS SPARKS To kill a mockingbird. If you haven't read it, I think you should because it is very interesting. STEPHEN CHBOSKY I will never forget the vision of Jamie walking towards me. NICHOLAS SPARKS As these images were going through my head, my breathing suddenly went still. I looked at Jamie, the... NICHOLAS SPARKS You don't have to learn much out of books, it's like if you want to learn about cows, you go milk on... HARPER LEE You can't really get to know a person until you get in their shoes and walk around in them. HARPER LEE The best part about being a stand-up is the connection with the audience. There's nothing more grati... ARIES SPEARS How lucky I am to have known somebody and something that saying goodbye to is so damned awful. EVANS G. VALENS I left school and couldn't find acting work, so I started going to clubs where you could do stan... ROBIN WILLIAMS I stand up to people. KEITH OLBERMANN Get up, stand up, Stand up for your rights. Get up, stand up, Don't give up the fight. BOB MARLEY A tooth for a tooth, will make the world's inhabitants a people without teeth SOTONYE ANGA To believe in love, to be ready to give up anything for it, to be willing to risk your life for it, ... LEONARDO DICAPRIO But long story short, I didn't start doing stand-up because I wanted to have a TV show or be an ... DEMETRI MARTIN The love you get, is equal to the love you give. BEN OAK Get up, stand up Stand up for your rights Get up, stand up Don't give up the fight. BOB MARLEY To love beauty is to see light. VICTOR HUGO The sad thing about reading the book and then watching the movie is that they have to die all over a... JOYCE RACHELLE My life is not mine - it is for my people – the humans – the humans of the thinking society. ABHIJIT NASKAR It takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies, but even more to stand up to your frie... J. K. ROWLING I like down-to-earth people. AMOS LEE Finding peace and contentment with Evernight—two emotions he was certain he’d never found in bed... KRISTEN CALLIHAN She crawled,” Ben said. There were tears in his voice. That was wrong. Ben barely even tolerated m... PATRICIA BRIGGS No human creature can give orders to love. GEORGE SAND I’d give you the moon right now,” she said. Levi’s eyes flashed happily, and he hitched u... RAINBOW ROWELL People need to stand up for their wrongs, as they stand up for their rights. ANTHONY LICCIONE People that have the hot dog stand already set up don't want to see another one set up around the co... ANTHONY CURTIS I use to stand up for what I believe, now, I believe in what I stand up for. MARIE-SUZANNE LABELLE (A.K.A MARIE-SUE) If you don't like it, learn to love it! RIC FLAIR Nicole can do anything that involves a ball and whistle. LAURIE HALSE ANDERSON To have the cognitive abilities to do research and development is vital to a forever expanding world... GARY F EVANS... The first and foremost human right or fundamental right is the right to exist. APURVA GAGLANI If we ever put research into what the subconscious is we could probably come to the conclusion that ... GARY F EVANS... i know im not the girl you wanted. not the one you want to hear from. but what you see is what you g... SIMI GREWAL In six years, this was not the first time they had found themselves in such a compromising posi... JACQUELINE FRANCIS - WANTING TO REMEMBER, TRYING TO FORGET When I was twelve, a fortune teller told me that my one true love would die young and leave me all a... TIFFANIE DEBARTOLO I want them to see Detroiters that love themselves. All of us need to continue to stand up for our c... KWAME KILPATRICK She filed the image away as an excellent and insulting question to ask the earl at an utterly inappr... GAIL CARRIGER The sad heart needs work to do. JOAN BAUER Most powerful of all powers in its holy insinuation is _being_. _To be_ is more powerful than even _... GEORGE MACDONALD When people come to see my stand-up, they get a chance to see my characters interact with each other... DANA CARVEY I would really like to go back to school. I would love it now. FIONA APPLE Sometimes the little things are what means more to me DEICY ZULEICA GONZALEZ Why, darling, I don't live at all when I'm not with you. ERNEST HEMINGWAY After Rilke's Letters -- by John VanDyke Wilmerding II this is my letter to a young ... RAINER MARIA RILKE I got into stand-up to get on a sitcom. DAVID SPADE In order to stand well in the eyes of the community, it is necessary to come up to a certain, somewh... THORSTEIN VEBLEN Each day I will accomplish one thing on my to do list. LAILAH GIFTY AKITA Luckily, I'm not a stand-up comedian, so I don't get the fear of standing on stage in front ... CHARLES STROSS Some read to learn, some to laugh, and some to live. JOYCE RACHELLE If "how to do it" were the answer, it'd be done. It's how you do the "hows" that's most important. JEFF OLSON There is no one right way. Just figure out what works for you! LORII MYERS Compromise now, because you'll have to later, anyway, only then you'll have gone through things you'... AYN RAND Every human being on this earth is born with a tragedy, and it isn't original sin. He's born with th... HELEN HAYES Love in all its forms is very difficult ... to express. It changes, obviously. If you’re young, an... DYLAN MORAN severe mental illness like psychosis can lead to a tragedy like this -- that people can see things t... ANDREA YATES Do you not understand?” he whispered. “I have never belonged to anyone. Not since I was a child.... KRISTEN CALLIHAN Just because you love someone doesn't mean you're meant to be together. MICHAELA D. There’s just one thing I want to know.” Julian nodded. “Anything.” �... S.J. FROST Felipe and I, as we discover to our delight, are a perfectly matched, genetically engineered belly-t... ELIZABETH GILBERT
More Chuck Palahniuk
You must realize that one day you will die. Until then you are worthless. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Give me rampant intellectualism as a coping mechanism. CHUCK PALAHNIUK The bright future is that readers are accepting more varied forms of stories. CHUCK PALAHNIUK More and more, it feels like I'm doing a really bad impersonation of myself. CHUCK PALAHNIUK You are not a beautiful, unique snowflake... This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Of the big horror movies of the '70s, you have 'The Omen,' 'The Sentinel,' '... CHUCK PALAHNIUK The best thing about getting a flu shot is that you never again need to wash your hands. That's ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will. CHUCK PALAHNIUK My private history in terms of people in my life who are dead is very easy to discuss. I don't f... CHUCK PALAHNIUK We are not special. We are not crap or trash, either. We just are. We just are, and what happens jus... CHUCK PALAHNIUK My goal is to create a metaphor that changes our reality by charming people into considering their w... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Portland in particular is a cheap enough place to live that you can still develop your passion - pai... CHUCK PALAHNIUK People used what they called a telephone because they hated being close together and they were scare... CHUCK PALAHNIUK The lower you fall, the higher you'll fly. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Why is it you feel like a dope if you laugh alone, but that's usually how you end up crying? CHUCK PALAHNIUK The unreal is more powerful than the real, because nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it, beca... CHUCK PALAHNIUK If you start in the pit of despair with these profane, awful things, even a glimmer of hope or aware... CHUCK PALAHNIUK A film has to maintain a certain decorum in order to be broadcast to a vast audience. CHUCK PALAHNIUK My grandfather was hit over the head by a crane boom in Seattle. Some of the family claimed he was n... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Movie brawls tend to be bloodless and quick. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Hey, even the Mona Lisa is falling apart. CHUCK PALAHNIUK You decide your own level of involvement. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Our real discoveries come from chaos, from going to the place that looks wrong and stupid and foolis... CHUCK PALAHNIUK The one you love and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person. CHUCK PALAHNIUK If I could wake up in a different place, at a different time, could I wake up as a different person? CHUCK PALAHNIUK The most boring thing in the entire world is nudity. The second most boring thing is honesty. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Hysteria is impossible without an audience. Panicking by yourself is the same as laughing alone in a... CHUCK PALAHNIUK The best way is not to fight it, just go. Don't be trying all the time to fix things. What you run f... CHUCK PALAHNIUK You can only hold a smile for so long, after that it's just teeth. CHUCK PALAHNIUK The only way to find true happiness is to risk being completely cut open. CHUCK PALAHNIUK What makes earth feel like hell is our expectation that it should feel like heaven. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Parents are like God because you wanna know they're out there, and you want them to think well of yo... CHUCK PALAHNIUK All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring. CHUCK PALAHNIUK For years now, I've wanted to fall asleep. The sort of slipping off, the giving up, the falling part... CHUCK PALAHNIUK We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will. CHUCK PALAHNIUK It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Ok. You fuck me, then snub me. You love me, you hate me. You show me a sensitive side, then you turn... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Fuck off with your sofa units and strine green stripe patterns, I say never be complete, I say stop ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK If you don't know what you want," the doorman said, "you end up with a lot you don't. CHUCK PALAHNIUK There are only patterns, patterns on top of patterns, patterns that affect other patterns. Patterns ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK We'll be remembered more for what we destroy than what we create. CHUCK PALAHNIUK The unreal is more powerful than the real. Because nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it. Beca... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Why do I do anything?' she says. 'I'm educated enough to talk myself out of any plan. To deconstruct... CHUCK PALAHNIUK A good story should make you laugh, and a moment later break your heart. CHUCK PALAHNIUK You realize that our mistrust of the future makes it hard to give up the past. CHUCK PALAHNIUK You know how both life and porno movies end. The only difference is life starts with the orgasm. CHUCK PALAHNIUK What people forget is a journey to nowhere starts with a single step, too. CHUCK PALAHNIUK When did the future switch from being a promise to being a threat? CHUCK PALAHNIUK A menos que todo empeore, nada puede mejorar. CHUCK PALAHNIUK You know how they say you only hurt the ones you love? Well, it works both ways. CHUCK PALAHNIUK What I want is to be needed. What I need is to be indispensable to somebody. Who I need is somebody ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK No matter how much you love someone, you still want to have you own way. CHUCK PALAHNIUK A girl calls and asks, "Does it hurt very much to die?" "Well, sweetheart," I tell her, "yes, b... CHUCK PALAHNIUK I used rebellion as a way to hide out. We use criticism as a fake participation. CHUCK PALAHNIUK On the other side of the handrail, the hallway's gray marble floor looks as if we've climbed a stair... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Love me, I'll be anyobdy you want me to be. Use me. Change me. I can be thin with big breasts and bi... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Your birth is a mistake you'll spend your whole life trying to correct. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Maybe this is why so many serial killers work in pairs. It's nice not to feel alone in a world full ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Just remember, the same as a spectacular Vogue magazine, remember that no matter how close you follo... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Disaster is a natural part of my evolution. Toward tragedy and dissolution. CHUCK PALAHNIUK If you tell folks you're a college student, folks are so impressed. You can be a student in anything... CHUCK PALAHNIUK The gyms you go to are crowded with guys trying to look like men, as being a man means looking the w... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Nothing is static. Even the Mona Lisa is falling apart. Since fight club, I can wiggle half the teet... CHUCK PALAHNIUK That old saying, how you always hurt the one you love, well, it works both ways CHUCK PALAHNIUK College is like a fountain of knowledge - and the students are there to drink CHUCK PALAHNIUK “Our real discoveries come from chaos, from going to the place that looks wrong and stupid and foo... CHUCK PALAHNIUK You can kill a lifetime without feeling anything but skin. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Love is bullshit. Emotion is bullshit. I am a rock. A jerk. I'm an uncaring asshole and proud of it. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Did you ever think about life as a metaphor for television? CHUCK PALAHNIUK On a large enough time line, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero. CHUCK PALAHNIUK And maybe you don't go to hell for the things you do. Maybe you go to hell for the things you don't ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Only after disaster can we be ressurected. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Imagine books and music and movies being filtered and homogenized. Certified. Approved for consumpti... CHUCK PALAHNIUK I admire addicts. In a world where everybody is waiting for some bline, random disaster, or some sud... CHUCK PALAHNIUK People have to really suffer before they can risk doing what they love. CHUCK PALAHNIUK While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Within you right now is the power to do things you never dreamed possible. This power becomes availa... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Las Vegas looks the way you'd imagine heaven must look at night. CHUCK PALAHNIUK It's easy to cry when you realize that everyone you love will reject you or die. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Recycling and speed limits are bullshit. They're like someone who quits smoking on his deathbed. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Maybe we should always assume the worst. CHUCK PALAHNIUK I hate how I don't feel real enough unless people are watching. CHUCK PALAHNIUK We can spend our lives letting the world tell us who we are. Sane or insane. Saints or sex addicts. ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK You are not your job, you're not how much money you have in the bank. You are not the car you drive.... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everyone I've ever known. CHUCK PALAHNIUK The truth is, every son raised by a single mom is pretty much born married. I don't know, but until ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK The laws that keep us safe, these same laws condemn us to boredom. CHUCK PALAHNIUK The first step to eternal life, is you have to die. CHUCK PALAHNIUK If you wake up at a different time, in a different place, could you wake up as a different person? CHUCK PALAHNIUK If death meant just leaving the stage long enough to change costume and come back as a new character... CHUCK PALAHNIUK When we don't know who to hate, we hate ourselves. CHUCK PALAHNIUK When nobody will look at you, you can stare a hole in them. Picking out all the little details you'd... CHUCK PALAHNIUK You can't base your life on the past or the present. You have to tell me about your future. CHUCK PALAHNIUK On a long enough timeline. The survival rate for everyone drops to zero. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Your parents, they give you your life, but then they try to give you their life. CHUCK PALAHNIUK I dread the promotion part of my job. It's agony, especially compared to the private, at-home jo... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet. CHUCK PALAHNIUK I wanted to write about the moment when your addictions no longer hide the truth from you. When your... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Jack Palance was my distant uncle - that's the family gossip. Growing up, my family knew everyth... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Our Generation has had no Great war, no Great Depression. Our war is spiritual. Our depression is ou... CHUCK PALAHNIUK I'm always trying to reach a transcendent point, a romantic point, but reach it in a really unco... CHUCK PALAHNIUK My best advice for writers is: Have your adventures, make your mistakes, and choose your friends poo... CHUCK PALAHNIUK With a book, you're guaranteed the audience has a certain skill level and that the audience has ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK If there had been zombies on the iceberg when the Titanic hit it, that would have made a much better... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Find joy in everything you choose to do. Every job, relationship, home... it's your responsibili... CHUCK PALAHNIUK The only difference between suicide and martyrdom is press coverage. CHUCK PALAHNIUK We're making the same mistakes we made 1,000 years ago. So they must be the right ones. So relax... CHUCK PALAHNIUK What is the real purpose behind the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus? They seem like gr... CHUCK PALAHNIUK My first four books, from 'Fight Club' to 'Choke,' dealt with personal identity issu... CHUCK PALAHNIUK In 2008, while the film version of my book 'Choke' was coming to market, my mother was diagn... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Mr. Olsen in the fifth grade made me want to be a writer. He said, 'Chuck, you do this really we... CHUCK PALAHNIUK I know that I'm going to die and that you're going to die. I can't do anything about tha... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Maybe it's better just living the way you figure life is when you're a kid. Before you get too smart... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Real smart begins when you quit quoting other people. CHUCK PALAHNIUK You hear the best stories from ordinary people. That sense of immediacy is more real to me than a lo... CHUCK PALAHNIUK People don't want their lives fixed. Nobody wants their problems solved. Their dramas. Their dis... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Beginning with Santa Claus as a cognitive exercise, a child is encouraged to share the same idea of ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK I say let me never be complete, I say may I never be content,I say deliver me from Swedish furniture... CHUCK PALAHNIUK You have to give up! you have to give up! You have to realize that someday you will die, U... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Big Brother fills us all with the same crap. My guess is he was clever the same way everybody thinks... CHUCK PALAHNIUK It's easy to attack and destroy an act of creation. It's a lot more difficult to perform one. CHUCK PALAHNIUK I feel my heart ache, but I've forgotten what that feeling means. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Fathers. Mothers. With all their caring and attention. They will f--- you up, every time. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Find good in what the world says is evil. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Make me into anything, but just love me. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Give me lust, baby. Flash. Give me malice. Flash. Give me detached existentialis... CHUCK PALAHNIUK It's all mirror, mirror on the wall because beauty is power the same way money is power the same way... CHUCK PALAHNIUK I thought we were a real love relationship. I did. I was very invested in love, but it was just this... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Fuck me. I'm so tired of being me. Me beautiful. Me ugly. Blonde. Brunette. A million fucking fashio... CHUCK PALAHNIUK If I can't be beautiful, I want to be invisible. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Most times, it's just a lot easier not to let the world know what's wrong. CHUCK PALAHNIUK No matter how much you think you love somebody, you'll step back when the pool of their blood edges ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK No matter how careful you are, there's going to be the sense you missed something, the collapsed fee... CHUCK PALAHNIUK I think a lot of people saw 'Fight Club' and thought, 'Right, here's our next Che Gu... CHUCK PALAHNIUK My father worked for the railroad, and whenever a train crashed, we would go as a family and steal f... CHUCK PALAHNIUK We live and we die and anything else is just a delusion. CHUCK PALAHNIUK I would say any behavior that is not the status quo is interpreted as insanity, when, in fact, it mi... CHUCK PALAHNIUK People would ask me to autograph their bodies and then the next time I'd see them on tour they... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Personal identity seems like it's just such an American archetype, from Holly Golightly re-inven... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Every decade, we get a stunning collection of dynamic, heartbreaking short stories. In the past, tho... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Horror stories give us a way of exhausting our emotions around social issues, like a woman's rig... CHUCK PALAHNIUK The trick to forgetting the big picture is to look at everything close-up. CHUCK PALAHNIUK HELLO! Look at me. HELLO! I am so ZEN. This is BLOOD. This is NOTHING. Hello. Everything is nothing,... CHUCK PALAHNIUK With a gun barrel between your teeth, you speak only in vowels. CHUCK PALAHNIUK What I did was pour out about a gallon of Chanel Number Five and put a burning wedding invitation to... CHUCK PALAHNIUK If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, doesn't it just lie there and rot? CHUCK PALAHNIUK Without pain, without sacrifice we would have nothing. Like the first monkey shot into space. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Find out what you're afraid of and go live there. CHUCK PALAHNIUK The idea that population growth guarantees a better life - financially or otherwise - is a myth that... CHUCK PALAHNIUK I tell everyone I interact with what I'm working on and let them bring me anecdotes that illustr... CHUCK PALAHNIUK 'At the Gates of the Animal Kingdom' by Amy Hempel showed me the lean quality of prose. CHUCK PALAHNIUK If you take my stuff apart, you'll find my choruses of repetitions are picked up almost verbatim... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Someday you will die, and until you know that, you're useless to me. CHUCK PALAHNIUK She's not wearing makeup so her face just looks like skin. CHUCK PALAHNIUK If you knew that your life was merely a phase or short, short segment of your entire existence, how ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Language, she said, was just our way to explain away the wonder and glory of the world. To deconstru... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Sometimes the very best way to deal with unpleasant things is to depict them in ways that allow peop... CHUCK PALAHNIUK My only writing ritual is to shave my head bald between writing the first and second drafts of a boo... CHUCK PALAHNIUK My personal theory is that younger audiences disdain books - not because those readers are dumber th... CHUCK PALAHNIUK He was the kind of boy any young girl should date while she's still able to recover. CHUCK PALAHNIUK My secret wish is right now to be romancing this dead girl. A dead girl. Any dead girl. I'm not what... CHUCK PALAHNIUK One thing I really envy about my friends who have kids is that as their children develop, they'r... CHUCK PALAHNIUK You have no idea what it is like to constantly disappoint people. You see it the moment you meet the... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Tyler and me at the edge of the roof, the gun in my mouth, I'm wondering how clean this gun is. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Put a gun to my head and paint the wall with my brains. CHUCK PALAHNIUK I try to forget about the expectation that's out there and the audience listening for the next t... CHUCK PALAHNIUK In a way, a lot of my humor comes from presenting things that are dramatic or shocking and then peop... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Then you're trapped in your lovely nest, and the things you used to own, now they own you. CHUCK PALAHNIUK The things you used to own, now they own you. CHUCK PALAHNIUK For me and my entire generation, we took on this kind of sarcastic, ironic, snarkiness because it se... CHUCK PALAHNIUK No matter how much you think you love somebody, you'll step back when the pool of their blood ed... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Did perpetual happiness in the Garden of Eden maybe get so boring that eating the apple was justifie... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Hysteria is only possible with an audience. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Game shows are designed to make us feel better about the random, useless facts that are all we have ... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Don't do what you want. Do what you don't want. Do what you're trained not to want. Do the things th... CHUCK PALAHNIUK With a gun stuck in your mouth and the barrel of the gun between your teeth, you can only talk in vo... CHUCK PALAHNIUK The things you own end up owning you. CHUCK PALAHNIUK No fear. No distractions. The ability to let that which does not matter truly slide. CHUCK PALAHNIUK We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depre... CHUCK PALAHNIUK We just had a near-life experience! CHUCK PALAHNIUK This is why I loved the support groups so much. If people thought you were dying, they gave you thei... CHUCK PALAHNIUK It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything. CHUCK PALAHNIUK If you could be God's worst enemy or nothing, which would you choose? CHUCK PALAHNIUK Being tired isn't the same as being rich, but most times it's close enough. CHUCK PALAHNIUK A minute of perfection was worth the effort. A moment was the most you could ever expect from perfec... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Masochism is a valuable job skill. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Someone bent on suicide won't have much sense of humor left. CHUCK PALAHNIUK Which is worse: Hell or nothing? CHUCK PALAHNIUK People don't want their lives fixed. Nobody wants their problems solved. Their dramas. Their distrac... CHUCK PALAHNIUK You buy furniture. You tell yourself, this is the last sofa I will ever need in my life. Buy the sof... CHUCK PALAHNIUK Real discoveries come from chaos. CHUCK PALAHNIUK The future is just wasted on some people. CHUCK PALAHNIUK You can find fresh pain every time you discover what you pretty much already know. CHUCK PALAHNIUK If you dont know what you want, you end up with a lot you dont CHUCK PALAHNIUK Theres always the chance you could die right in the middle of your life story CHUCK PALAHNIUK Us. God's forgotten Science Fair project, left to grow mold. God's goldfish, ignored until we're for... CHUCK PALAHNIUK As if you cut open a rag doll with a sill name, and found inside:Real intestines, real lungs, a beat... CHUCK PALAHNIUK You are not special. Your are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic... CHUCK PALAHNIUK I tell everybody, i'm tired of being jerked around, okay? so lets just not pretend. i don't have fuc... CHUCK PALAHNIUK