How to make God laugh: Tell him your future plans.

God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.

Side Effects Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on the weekend.

Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday.

To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on