Getting drunk is an paradox! When people party they feel like royalty at the village pub, but feel like an outcast while kneeling at the porcelain throne?

Time is like a half stick of gum. While you wish you had more, you're still glad you have some to cover up your bad breath.

Ordinary people are easy to spot. They are the ones doing the same things you are. Time to try something different!

Is there any doubt that the people you expect to frustrate you never fail to live up to that expectation?

Now tequila may be the favored beverage of outlaws but that doesn't mean it gives them preferential treatment. In fact, tequila probably has betrayed as many outlaws as has the central nervous system and dissatisfied wives. Tequila, scorpion honey, harsh dew of the doglands, essence of Aztec, crema de cacti; tequila, oily and thermal like the sun in solution; tequila, liquid geometry of passion; Tequila, the buzzard god who copulates in midair with the ascending souls of dying virgins; tequila, firebug in the house of good taste; O tequila, savage water of sorcery, what confusion and mischief your sly, rebellious drops do generate!

The caffeine drinks that kids are drinking are loaded with sugar and fat calories. Not only are they drinking caffeine, but they're getting hundreds of calories.