Counting in octal is just like counting in decimal, if you don't use your thumbs.

Be prepared, and be careful not to do your good deeds when there's no one watching you.

I always prided myself on at least trying to be literate and use the right words, and if the audience didn't get it, then they could go home and look it up.

You can't be satirical and not be offensive to somebody.

Laughter is involuntary. If it's funny you laugh.

The real issues I don't think most people touch. The Clinton jokes are all about Monica Lewinsky and all that stuff and not about the important things, like the fact that he wouldn't ban landmines.