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You can't cancel my stand-up tours. It's impossible. There's too many separate bosses. There is no 'bosses.'


Louis C. K.

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MARGARET PETERSON HADDIX I'm still a big 'Grey's Anatomy' fan.
BROOKE ELLIOTT I used to watch 'Grey's Anatomy' pretty religiously.
ERINN HAYES Are you taking us to the beach?" - Dan Cahill
JUDE WATSON Let's head out to the ruins." - Dan Cahill
ROLAND SMITH About f-f-ace!" she said to the horse, flailing with her boots. "Into the barn, please. It's time fo...
PETER LERANGIS You see?" Damien leaned over his desk and spread out half a dozen charcoal sketches. "These are only...
RICK RIORDAN It looks ancient," - Amy Cahill
JUDE WATSON It SMELLS ancient," - Dan Cahill
JUDE WATSON Palm trees were fanned by a warm, light breeze, and they rolled down their windows to smell the sea.
JUDE WATSON I always find Victoria's Secret models a bit weird.
EDIE CAMPBELL I've got a few ideas," (Amy) admitted. "But I don't know where we're going in the long term. I mean ...
RICK RIORDAN With power comes the abuse of power. And where there are bosses, there are crazy bosses. It's no...
JUDD ROSE Alas, I think I am becoming a god.
TITUS Some men by ancestry are only the shadow of a mighty name.
LUCAN I have a wife, I have sons: all of them hostages given to fate.
LUCAN I'm proud to say that I was that guy playing the character of Dr. Burke on 'Grey's Anato...
ISAIAH WASHINGTON Before 'Grey's Anatomy,' I was doing musicals, plays, commercials, you name it.
CHANDRA WILSON Don't have to see," the pilot grunted. "Olga knows the way."
"Funny name for an aircraft...
GORDON KORMAN Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.
SENECA Drunkenness is nothing but voluntary madness.
SENECA We never reflect how pleasant it is to ask for nothing.
SENECA Just as I shall select my ship when I am about to go on a voyage, or my house when I propose to take...
SENECA Begin at once to live, and count each separate day as a separate life.
SENECA Luck is where opportunity meets preparation.
SENECA Friendship always benefits; love sometimes injures.
SENECA If it's anything I can't stand, it's yes-men. When I say no, I want you to say no, too.
JACK WARNER There's nothing that's impossible to me. You can ask my parents.
TAYLOR WILSON They got rid of bottled water. We got thermoses that say 'Grey's Anatomy Season 4' with ...
BROOKE SMITH 'Horrible Bosses' is just blatant, outright fun. I've read some of what the critics have...
CHRIS PINE My philosophy is: If you can't have fun, there's no sense in doing it.
PAUL WALKER Don't look now but there's one man too many in this room and I think it's you!
BERT KALMAR When you model, there's no way you can't notice yourself. Do you know what I mean? Because y...
CARA DELEVINGNE On 'Grey's Anatomy,' I didn't have to move too much. I think I ran through the hospi...
ERIC DANE Metal isn't necessarily aggressive. There's metal that's contemplative, there's meta...
JOHN DARNIELLE A play, after all, is a mystery. There's no narration. And as soon as there's no narration, ...
MIKE NICHOLS You can't force chemistry. It's either there or it's not. You can't create it.
HANNAH SIMONE My roots are in stand-up, and stand-up is very freeing. There's no script involved; you just fly...
HARLAND WILLIAMS Rotten bosses don't get better. Any strategy that assumes they can is doomed.
SCOTT ADAMS Spaghetti... I can't eat spaghetti, there's too many of them. No matter how hungry I am, 1,0...
MITCH HEDBERG There's no point regretting things. If you can't do the time, don't do the crime. Life&#...
ROBBIE WILLIAMS There's no greatest moment in the arts. It's a life, it's a continuity thing. You can...
LEROY NEIMAN I've got corporate executives, my bosses... this is true... who will text message me... and say,...
STUART SCOTT It's not whether you fall or make a mistake, it's what you do when you fall. And I say you s...
CARY-HIROYUKI TAGAWA 'Bossy' is someone who bosses people around without reason.
STEFANIE POWERS Don't you know there ain't no devil, it's just god when he's drunk.
TOM WAITS My house has too many distractions. There's the email. There's checking my Amazon ranking. I...
HARLAN COBEN I can't focus when there's too many things around. Whenever I used to go to the office, I us...
ZAHA HADID Cancer's like the ultimate excuse. Who's gonna say, 'Oh, no, you have to show up for thi...
MELISSA ETHERIDGE There's nothing women can't do. There's absolutely nothing we can't do. We're fa...
BETTY WILLIAMS There's so many ways to do stand up, and I think for awhile, people weren't really maximizin...
GREG FITZSIMMONS There's something about doing stand-up that's cathartic.
DAVE CHAPPELLE Television is more of a business. You can't take as many risks, because there's so many chan...
DANA DELANY I have too many responsibilities and principles. There's no time for 'guilty' pleasures.
A. R. RAHMAN A building is no good if someone's got to explain to you why it's good. You can't say yo...
DAVID CHIPPERFIELD My show 'The Big House' was picked up; they flew me to New York. I'm about to step on st...
KEVIN HART But you can't exercise and be high. It's impossible.
TOMMY CHONG I can safely say that other than macaroni and cheese, there's no processed food in my life. Ther...
GINNIFER GOODWIN When people say, 'You have Alzheimer's,' you have no idea what Alzheimer's is. You k...
NANCY REAGAN Everyone Instagrams all the people they are with. I get that it's part of the job. But there'...
EDIE CAMPBELL I'm one with New York, and New York is one with me. I grew up there; there's no escaping it....
ADRIAN GRENIER Don't you find that the more you know, the more you don't know and can't ever learn beca...
LARRY HAGMAN There's no way that anyone can know the ebb and flow of one's career. You can't know tha...
HOLLY HUNTER When I make a fist, it's strong, and you can't tear it apart. As long as there's unity, ...
ARA PARSEGHIAN When people say to me, 'What do you think of rap music?', my answer is, 'There's no ...
JACK JONES There's a great power in words, if you don't hitch too many of them together.
JOSH BILLINGS There's a pattern when tours start - a pattern of infighting, of making up, of breaking up, of a...
NIKKI SIXX Love bravely, live bravely, be courageous, there's really nothing to lose. There's no wrong ...
JEWEL There's so many, 'no, black people aren't like that' barriers in mainstream media.
ISSA RAE You can't wrestle forever. It's a very physically taxing job. There's no doubt about it....
CHRIS JERICHO There's no sense in doing something, especially if it's a hard job, if you can't have a ...
VIGGO MORTENSEN La vida es un regalo diario. Valóralo. Al final, lo que importa no son los años de vida, sino la v...
PAOLA CALASANZ ''DULCINEA'' So many people wanted an adventure. It was really more about finding the cast that I wanted for '...
MARK BURNETT When people say to me 'what do you think of rap music?' my answer is there's no such thi...
IRWIN THOMAS It's a sad man my friend who's livin' in his own skin and can't stand the company.
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN I'm that person who says, 'No matter what the problem is, there's a solution.' That&...
MIRANDA KERR I see no reason to quit. I can't imagine walking away from being Big Bird. I mean, that's an...
CAROLL SPINNEY While 'Precious' isn't a real person, it's someone's story, and it's too man...
GABOUREY SIDIBE Look, you know, you can't please everybody. I'm a stand-up comic. I know that. It doesn'...
BILLY GARDELL There's some bells you can't unring.
KEN CUCCINELLI Nothing's harder than writing. There's no comparison. With directing, you can bounce a lot o...
SYLVESTER STALLONE There aren't too many people out there who can start one of my books and not finish it. I don...
JOY FIELDING You can't buy something which does not exist. In a way, let's make things exist and then jud...
ROSS LOVEGROVE When I first used to tour, guys would come up and say, 'Where's the fight club in my area?&#...
CHUCK PALAHNIUK There's a cardinal rule that you don't talk about sharks. If you don't see it, it's ...
MARK WARKENTIN I don't separate things out between what's personal and what's my work. My passion is pe...
MAIWENN There's always going to be silly stuff out there in the media that you can't worry too much ...
AARON RODGERS I do freestyle jumping. Been doing since I was eight years old and can't quit. I'm addicted....
VANILLA ICE I think it's funny because on 'Glee Project,' there's that added pressure, but with ...
SAMUEL LARSEN A lot of people said this was impossible. 'You can't build biotech for $50,000. You can'...
ARVIND GUPTA The wonderful thing about writing for theatre is you can go anywhere you want with the language. The...
SAM SHEPARD Sobering up was responsible for breaking up my marriage. That's what it couldn't stand.
JAMES TAYLOR We don't understand why we're here, no one's giving us an answer, religion is vague, you...
ADAM DRIVER I'm a mad Gummi fan. I always have Gummis in my trailer. But you can't eat too many because ...
JENSEN ACKLES I didn't do it, nobody saw me do it, there's no way you can prove anything!
NANCY CARTWRIGHT If there's no inner peace, people can't give it to you. The husband can't give it to you...
LINDA EVANS There's no credit in not doing what you don't want to do. There's no virtue in not falli...
GILBERT PARKER There's so much of it you can't control. There is no handbook for how to conduct yourself in...
SHERYL CROW It's like being at the kids' table at Thanksgiving - you can put your elbows on it, you don&...
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NATE ROBINSON

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I'm bored' is a useless thing to say. You live in a great, big, vast world that you've s...
LOUIS C. K. When I read things like the foundations of capitalism are shattering, I'm like, maybe we need th...
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LOUIS C. K. It's easier to cancel a show if it's expensive.
LOUIS C. K. Friends should always tell you the truth. But please don’t.
LOUIS C. K. All these words we use, anybody can be a genius now. It used to be you had to have a thought no one ...
LOUIS C. K. If you're a woman and a guy's ever said anything romantic to you, he just left off the secon...
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LOUIS C. K. Sometimes I try to take a nap before shows. That clears my head.
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LOUIS C. K. If you're a cartoon character or most TV characters, sure, you'll fight, because the punches...
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LOUIS C. K. I find that when people laugh really hard, it's usually because they're connecting and identifying i...
LOUIS C. K. Out of the people that ever were, almost all of them are dead. There are way more dead people, and y...
LOUIS C. K. The meal is not over when I'm full. The meal is over when I hate myself.
LOUIS C. K. Pushing the envelope' sort of implies that you're inside the envelope with everyone else, an...
LOUIS C. K. Some entertainers don't pay attention to what's going on around them.
LOUIS C. K. I'm not motivated to entertain people through Twitter, so just by having Twitter and not saying ...
LOUIS C. K. I thought about going to NYU film school - that was this ideal to me. But I didn't make any kind...
LOUIS C. K. I like pressure. Pressure doesn't make me crack. It's enabling. I eat pressure, and there mi...
LOUIS C. K. My ex-wife, she really didn't like the material that I did. And that's something I regret, t...
LOUIS C. K. To me, it's very exhilarating when somebody else does a great thing, and it's not me.
LOUIS C. K. Well, when I was younger, I lied all the time, because once you understand the power of lying, it...
LOUIS C. K. If I do something for my kids, I get a medal, because most fathers don't.
LOUIS C. K. To me the goal of comedy is to just laugh, which is a really high hearted thing, visceral connection...
LOUIS C. K. A household name is like ketchup. Everybody wants ketchup. Ketchup doesn't hurt anybody.
LOUIS C. K. I've had soccer moms come up and tell me they can relate when I say that I want to throw my baby...
LOUIS C. K. There's been a lot of simple vilification of right-wing people. It's really easy to say, ...
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C. K. WILLIAMS I don't like denial. I don't like repression.
C. K. WILLIAMS I don't think of reflection on dark things as necessarily dark.
C. K. WILLIAMS A dark poem is meant to redeem the dark part.
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C. K. WILLIAMS Poems have a different music from ordinary language, and every poem has a different kind of music of...
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C. K. WILLIAMS morning: that first sapphire dome of glow.
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K All the mysteries of the universe are solved within the Imagination.
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C. JOYBELL C. Last night I lost the world, and gained the universe.
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C. JOYBELL C. Anger is like flowing water; there's nothing wrong with it as long as you let it flow. Hate is like ...
C. JOYBELL C. Our bodies have five senses: touch, smell, taste, sight, hearing. But not to be overlooked are the s...
C. JOYBELL C. I cannot have a man who is afraid of everything, I don't have the time to soothe insecurities and fe...
C. JOYBELL C. Humanity does not suffer from the disease of wrong beliefs but humanity suffers from the contagious ...
C. JOYBELL C. I have realized; it is during the times I am far outside my element that I experience myself the mos...
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C. JOYBELL C. There are people who are generic. They make generic responses and they expect generic answers. They ...
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C. JOYBELL C. Let the ideas clash but not the hearts.
C. C. MEHTA Do not yearn to be popular; be exquisite. Do not desire to be famous; be loved. Do not take pride in...
C. JOYBELL C. The difference between my darkness and your darkness is that I can look at my own badness in the fac...
C. JOYBELL C. The only problem with her is that she is too perfect. She is bad in a way that entices, and good in ...
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C. JOYBELL C. The best love in the world, is the love of a man. The love of a man who came from your womb, the lov...
C. JOYBELL C. There is danger when a man throws his tongue into high gear before he gets his brain a-going.
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C. JOYBELL C. Go in the direction of where your peace is coming from.
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C. JOYBELL C. A fine giornata ci sono poche persone intorno a voi che vogliono veramente vedervi sereni, felici e ...
C. JOYBELL C. Please do not break your heart over the withering of a dream you once held, that never became yours!...
C. JOYBELL C. Today, young girls measure the quality of their beauty based upon its entertainment value. The more ...
C. JOYBELL C. Writing, music, sculpting, painting, and prayer! These are the three things that are most closely re...
C. JOYBELL C. Flowers that are offered for the dead, do not know the difference of where their beauty will be plac...
C. JOYBELL C. Beauty without grace is like a fish far displaced from the water and looking at this kind of beauty ...
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C. JOYBELL C. You can be the most beautiful person in the world and everybody sees light and rainbows when they lo...
C. JOYBELL C. I believe in women uplifting other women. The only thing that makes our gender weaker, is the fact t...
C. JOYBELL C. I find it odd- the greed of mankind. People only like you for as long as they perceive they can get ...
C. JOYBELL C. My spirit is healthy, yes. But I tell you, my flesh is healthy too. I am enlightened and free, but I...
C. JOYBELL C. Life is not compassionate towards victims. The trick is not to see yourself as one. It's never too l...
C. JOYBELL C. ‎"You shouldn't feel so bad about being afraid of so many things." "Why not?" "Because if you were...
C. JOYBELL C. I don't know why people are afraid of lust. Then I can imagine that they are very afraid of me, for ...
C. JOYBELL C. God is colourblind. But we are not God. God does not need to see colour and difference. God is far b...
C. JOYBELL C. It is only when you accept how different you all are, that you will be able to see how much the same...
C. JOYBELL C. It is when we think we can act like God, that all respect is lost, and I think this is the downfall ...
C. JOYBELL C. I think the reason why I don't read so much, is because as I have observed, whole books all boil dow...
C. JOYBELL C. Living is about capturing the essence of things. I go through my life every day with a vial, a vial ...
C. JOYBELL C. A lot of pieces I have written have to do with courage. As a result, people think that I am naturall...
C. JOYBELL C. I think that if you have a horse, pegasus, qilin, or unicorn, you should sit on it! You should strok...
C. JOYBELL C. The sun shall always rise upon a new day and there shall always be a rose garden within me. Yes, the...
C. JOYBELL C. Inside every woman, is a crazy girl. And we all know what I'm talking about. That part of you that i...
C. JOYBELL C. Destiny is real. And she's not mild-mannered. She will come around and hit you in the face and knock...
C. JOYBELL C. Silk is a fine, delicate, soft, illuminating, beautiful substance. But you can never rip it! If a ma...
C. JOYBELL C. University can teach you skill and give you opportunity, but it can't teach you sense, nor give you ...
C. JOYBELL C. The dance between darkness and light will always remain— the stars and the moon will always need t...
C. JOYBELL C. Men have two greatest fears: the first fear is the fear of being needed, and the second fear is the ...
C. JOYBELL C. Anything that you learn becomes your wealth, a wealth that cannot be taken away from you; whether yo...
C. JOYBELL C. If you walk on sunlight, bathe in moonlight, breathe in a golden air and exhale a Midas' touch; mark...
C. JOYBELL C. If you swim effortlessly in the deep oceans, ride the waves to and from the shore, if you can breath...
C. JOYBELL C. There is a magnificent, beautiful, wonderful painting in front of you! It is intricate, detailed, a ...
C. JOYBELL C. Ends are not bad things, they just mean that something else is about to begin. And there are many th...
C. JOYBELL C. The strength of a woman is not measured by the impact that all her hardships in life have had on her...
C. JOYBELL C. To know a species, look at its fears. To know yourself, look at your fears. Fear in itself is not im...
C. JOYBELL C. It's definitely difficult being a woman and growing up a girl. When you're graceful, people say you ...
C. JOYBELL C. There are two things we should always be 1. raw and 2. ready. When you are raw, you are always ready...
C. JOYBELL C. Life is a bowl of cherries. Some cherries are rotten while others are good; its your job to throw ou...
C. JOYBELL C. Choose your battles wisely. After all, life isn't measured by how many times you stood up to fight. ...
C. JOYBELL C. I'm not in search of sanctity, sacredness, purity; these things are found after this life, not in th...
C. JOYBELL C. There are powers far beyond us, plans far beyond what we could have ever thought of, visions far mor...
C. JOYBELL C. I believe in going with the flow. I don't believe in fighting against the flow. You ride on your riv...
C. JOYBELL C. It is beautiful to discover our wings and learn how to fly; flight is a beautiful process. But then ...
C. JOYBELL C. Grace is what picks me up and lifts my wings high above and I fly! Grace always conquers! Be gracefu...
C. JOYBELL C.