When I saw the finished product -- I watched it with my manager -- I said I think I should sign it, because it's a funny movie.


Bob Saget

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Pump gas and hydraulic cams are for minivans.........
WAYNE SMOTHERS
I think I watched a movie about it.
AARON EDWARDS
Woman is always fickle - foolish is he who trusts her.
FRANCIS I
Long ailments wear out pain, and long hopes, joy.
STANISLAUS I
Youth is the first victim of war; the first fruit of peace. It takes 20 years or more of peace to ma...
BAUDOUIN I
Courage is like love; it must have hope for nourishment.
NAPOLEON I
When a girl ceases to blush, she has lost the most powerful charm of her beauty.
GREGORY I
One should act in consonance with the way of heaven and earth, which is enduring and eternal. The su...
I CHING
The quiet and solitary man apprehends the inscrutable. He seeks nothing, holds to the mean, and rema...
I CHING
Great effort is required to arrest decay and restore vigor. One must exercise proper deliberation, p...
I CHING
Before a thunderstorm there is a build-up of tension which is only relieved by the explosive force o...
I CHING
Creativity comes from awakening and directing men's higher natures, which originate in the primal de...
I CHING
The way of the creative works through change and transformation, so that each thing receives its tru...
I CHING
Change is certain. Peace is followed by disturbances; departure of evil men by their return. Such re...
I CHING
The responses of human beings vary greatly under dangerous circumstances. The strong man advances bo...
I CHING
A person in danger should not try to escape at one stroke. He should first calmly hold his own, then...
I CHING
He who possesses the source of enthusiasm will achieve great things. Doubt not. You will gather frie...
I CHING
Although I may not be a lioness, I am a lion's cub, and inherit many of his qualities; and as long a...
ELIZABETH I
Fiat justitia et pereat mundus.
Let justice be done, though the world perish.
FERDINAND I
Though God hath raised me high, yet this I count the glory of my crown: that I have reigned with you...
ELIZABETH I
I am your anointed Queen. I will never be by violence constrained to do anything. I thank God I am e...
ELIZABETH I
Never make a defense or apology before you are accused.
CHARLES I
It takes twenty years or more of peace to make a man; it takes only twenty seconds of war to destroy...
BAUDOUIN I
Must! Is must a word to be addressed to princes? Little man, little man! thy father, if he had been ...
ELIZABETH I
Everything proceeds as if of its own accord, and this can all too easily tempt us to relax and let t...
I CHING
In a few years there will be only five kings in the world -- the King of England and the four kings ...
FAROUK I
Never make a defence or apology before you be accused.
CHARLES I
The daughter of debate That still discord doth sow.
ELIZABETH I
'Twas God the word that spake it, He took the bread and brake it, And what the word did make i...
ELIZABETH I
If I follow the inclination of my nature, it is this: beggar-woman and single, far rather than queen...
ELIZABETH I
When a girl ceases to blush, she has lost the most powerful charm of her beauty
GREGORY I
The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delig...
I. KRISHNAMURTI
People are not an interruption of our business. People are our business.
A man's worst difficulties begin when he is able to do as he likes.
It is hard to look up to a leader who keeps his ear to the ground.
The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.
The more intelligent a man is, the more originality he discovers in men. Ordinary people see no diff...
The intelligence is proved not by ease of learning, but by understanding what we learn.
Communication is something so simple and difficult that we can never put it in simple words.
Like threads of silver seen through crystal beads
Let love through good deeds show.
How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.
Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor.
ELIZABETH I
In everyone's heart stirs a great homesickness.
That is the supreme value of history. The study of it is the best guarantee against repeating it.
It is a natural virtue incident to our sex to be pitiful of those that are afflicted.
ELIZABETH I
A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing.
ELIZABETH I
There is one thing higher than Royalty: and that is religion, which causes us to leave the world, an...
ELIZABETH I
If we still advise we shall never do.
ELIZABETH I
Those who appear the most sanctified are the worst.
ELIZABETH I
Though I am not imperial, and though Elizabeth may not deserve it, the Queen of England will easily ...
ELIZABETH I
The word must is not to be used to princes.
ELIZABETH I
The end crowneth the work.
ELIZABETH I
A fool too late bewares when all the peril is past.
ELIZABETH I
Brass shines as fair to the ignorant as gold to the goldsmiths.
ELIZABETH I
One man with a head on his shoulders is worth a dozen without.
ELIZABETH I
God has given such brave soldiers to this Crown that, if they do not frighten our neighbours, at lea...
ELIZABETH I
God forgive you, but I never can.
ELIZABETH I
I would rather go to any extreme than suffer anything that is unworthy of my reputation, or of that ...
ELIZABETH I
The past cannot be cured.
ELIZABETH I
The stone often recoils on the head of the thrower.
ELIZABETH I
I have the heart of a man, not a woman, and I am not afraid of anything.
ELIZABETH I
I do not so much rejoice that God hath made me to be a Queen, as to be a Queen over so thankful a pe...
ELIZABETH I
To be a king and wear a crown is a thing more glorious to them that see it than it is pleasant to th...
ELIZABETH I
I do not want a husband who honours me as a queen, if he does not love me as a woman.
ELIZABETH I
I know I have the body of a weak and feeble woman, but I have the heart and stomach of a king, and o...
ELIZABETH I
Do not tell secrets to those whose faith and silence you have not already tested.
ELIZABETH I
All my possessions for a moment of time.
ELIZABETH I
You should learn how say things with your eyes that others waste time putting into words.
EYDEN I.
As for my own part I care not for death, for all men are mortal; and though I be a woman yet I have ...
ELIZABETH I
I would rather be a beggar and single than a queen and married.
ELIZABETH I
Monarchs ought to put to death the authors and instigators of war, as their sworn enemies and as dan...
ELIZABETH I
Have the courage to face a difficulty lest it kick you harder than you bargain for.
STANISLAUS I
Fear not, we are of the nature of the lion, and cannot descend to the destruction of mice and such s...
ELIZABETH I
Though the sex to which I belong is considered weak you will nevertheless find me a rock that bends ...
ELIZABETH I
(Response to King Erik XIV of Sweden's proposal of marriage:)

"[W]hile we perceive ... th...
ELIZABETH I
[F]rom my years of understanding ... I happily chose this kind of life in which I yet live [i.e., un...
ELIZABETH I
[I]n the end this shall be for me sufficient, that a marble stone shall declare that a Queen, having...
ELIZABETH I
To be vain of one's rank or place, is to show that one is below it.
STANISLAS I
Our wisdom comes usually from our experience, and our experience comes largely from our experience.
One thing about the school of experience is that it will repeat the lesson if you flunk the first ti...
To reprove small faults within due vehemence, is as absurd as if a man should take a great hammer to...
Faith is like electricity. You can't see it, but you can see the light.
Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle of...
Some families can trace their ancestors back three hundred years, but can't tell you where their chi...
A recent survey was said to prove that the people we Americans most admire are our politicians and d...
If a man defrauds you one time, he is a rascal; if he does it twice, you are a fool.
Flattery looks like friendship, just like a wolf looks like a dog.
Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
Courage is always greatest when blended with meekness; intellectual ability is most admired when it ...
Freedom also includes the right to mismanage your own affairs.
Let your friends be the friends of your deliberate choice.
The man who has strong opinions and always says what he thinks is courageous - and friendless.
Friendship is love with understanding.
So few people think. When we find one who really does, we call him a genius
Your life can't go according to plan if you have no plan.
Practicing the Golden Rule is not a sacrifice; it is an investment.
Conversation is an exercise of the mind; gossip is merely an exercise of the tongue.
An expert gossiper knows how much to leave out of a conversation
To live so that you would not be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip, is to have li...
Gossip is sometimes referred to as halitosis of the mind

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I laugh at really dirty [expletive deleted]. I always have.
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I love telling stories and acting and entertaining people. I don't want to make fun of people.
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There was one woman at a press junket before the film was released who was very upset over the thing...
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The film, as crazy as it is, is a love letter to comedians and comedy and all the different ways the...
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The thing that changed me the most as a person was the play I did in New York,
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I think when you dissect a joke too much, you have ruined whatever there is in comedy.
BOB SAGET
Yet there are some people - Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever; he's a really funny guy, b...
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I have a feeling I'm going to wake up one day and say 'I can't do dirty stuff anymore, I...
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I think Desperate Housewives is a pretty good show, I watch it, I like it and I don't love reali...
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I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn't get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn't join a b...
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Paul Riser tells it in an interesting way; he dissects it and tells the structure, you know, 'yo...
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Celebrity is a word that I find offensive. That's the c-word. I hate it. It means no discernible...
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It's not the feel-good movie of the year and it's not a woman's film, really. It's a guy's sense of ...
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It think [acceptance levels] sort of swings back and forth. Like in the 60s there was a lot more fre...
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I think things just happen to people. That's healthier, I feel, than believing there's some ...
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I've met so many remarkable people so far, coming up through stand-up all these years, who just ...
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I don't like the negative of reality tv - the 'you're no good, so you have to leave, I c...
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No one is free, even the birds are chained to the sky.
BOB DYLAN
In our family, mom and dad are Longhorns, our first two kids are Aggies and we're hoping our las...
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And I came away from that experience, and it was a very difficult experience - I came to understand ...
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I believe Watergate shows that the system did work. Particularly the Judiciary and the Congress, and...
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A mistake is to commit a misunderstanding.
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It's hard to speculate what tomorrow may bring.
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Education is a shared commitment between dedicated teachers, motivated students and enthusiastic par...
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Open your eyes, look within. Are you satisfied with the life you're living?
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We want people that fit in our locker room. As I said, it's all about teamwork.
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If something can corrupt you, you're corrupted already.
BOB MARLEY
None but ourselves can free our minds.
BOB MARLEY
When you smoke the herb, it reveals you to yourself.
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You entertain people who are satisfied. Hungry people can't be entertained - or people who are a...
BOB MARLEY
Me don't dip on nobody's side. Me don't dip on the black man's side, not the white m...
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Everything is political. I will never be a politician or even think political. Me just deal with lif...
BOB MARLEY
Every time I plant a seed, He say kill it before it grow, he say kill it before they grow.
BOB MARLEY
It take many a year, mon, and maybe some bloodshed must be, but righteousness someday prevail.
BOB MARLEY
My music will go on forever. Maybe it's a fool say that, but when me know facts me can say facts...
BOB MARLEY
I don't stand for the black man's side, I don' t stand for the white man's side. I s...
BOB MARLEY
What important is man should live in righteousness, in natural love for mankind.
BOB MARLEY
Tell the children the truth.
BOB MARLEY
Prejudice is a chain, it can hold you. If you prejudice, you can't move, you keep prejudice for ...
BOB MARLEY
I don't believe in death, neither in flesh nor in spirit.
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Bob Marley isn't my name. I don't even know my name yet.
BOB MARLEY
You have to be someone.
BOB MARLEY
Rastafari not a culture, it's a reality.
BOB MARLEY
My future is righteousness.
BOB MARLEY
Me is a common sense man. That mean when me explain things, me explain it in a very simple way; that...
BOB MARLEY
You got to go down a lot of wrong roads to find the right one.
BOB PARSONS
I believe, I believe every day is a good day when you paint.
BOB ROSS
My music fights against the system that teaches to live and die.
BOB MARLEY
I can only get my drummer in the winter; he plays with Grand Funk all summer.
BOB SEGER
Life is just a bowl of cherries, don't take it serious, its mysterious. Life is just a bowl of c...
BOB FOSSE
When one door is closed, don't you know, another is open.
BOB MARLEY
Man is a universe within himself.
BOB MARLEY
Me only have one ambition, y'know. I only have one thing I really like to see happen. I like to ...
BOB MARLEY
The central dilemma in journalism is that you don't know what you don't know.
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Yesterday's just a memory, tomorrow is never what it's supposed to be.
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The devil ain't got no power over me. The devil come, and me shake hands with the devil. Devil h...
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When I first started out, 'Time' magazine did an article on what it called 'the sick com...
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The pictures are created by the listener, with a little help from the broadcaster. The pictures are ...
BOB EDWARDS
The 2011 riots in England, which left five dead and caused more than $300 million in property damage...
BOB BARR
God sent me on earth. He send me to do something, and nobody can stop me. If God want to stop me, th...
BOB MARLEY
As a man sow, shall he reap. and I know that talk is cheap. But the heat of the battle is as sweet a...
BOB MARLEY
You not supposed to feel down over whatever happen to you. I mean, you're supposed to use whatev...
BOB MARLEY
There's no use in the prime minister coming to Scotland unless he's prepared to do this deal. Unless...
BOB GELDOF
Italy ... is the least generous of the developed world with regard to aid and that is a shame. We as...
BOB GELDOF
Paul, join the club, dude. It's not that hard.
BOB GELDOF
We live in a broken world which has never been healthier, wealthier or bizarrely, free of conflict, ...
BOB GELDOF
I understand this is a process but the process should have been accelerated and added to at the UN.
BOB GELDOF
You'll think I'm off my trolley when I say this, but the Bush administration is the most radical -- ...
BOB GELDOF
If we can get the domestic heat to such a temperature, just possibly we can reach down that ladder a...
BOB GELDOF
I will be extremely active in trying to get these people thrown out of office.
BOB GELDOF
I don't think anyone sets out to malign poor people but certainly that's what we do through organiza...
BOB GELDOF
I never eat anything white.. white flour, white milk, white cream, eggwhites, white sugar, white pot...
BOB CUMMINGS
My biggest win was getting the meal money bumped from $5 to $7.
BOB COUSY
Baseball hasn't forgotten me. I go to a lot of old-timers games and I haven't lost a thing. ...
BOB UECKER
Cities may now bulldoze private citizens' homes, farms and small businesses to make way for shop...
BOB GOODLATTE
Every Maryland family wants financial security, schools that work, quality healthcare, safer neighbo...
BOB EHRLICH
I got a tooth bust by somebody who decided they didn't like me and I thought the moustache hid a...
BOB AINSWORTH
I think that cable TV is a great venue to do something interesting.
BOB ODENKIRK
After several trillion dollars of stimulation by the Obama Administration and the Fed, one might thi...
BOB BEAUPREZ
Success in business today requires real-time, mobile access to business opportunities.
BOB MCDONNELL
When you hear in the tape recordings Nixon's own voice saying, We have to stonewall, We have to ...
BOB WOODWARD
Homeowners and business owners across the country agreed to pay premiums, communities agreed to adop...
BOB NEY
In the dime stores and bus stations, people talk of situations, read books, repeat quotations, draw ...
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For computer communications, computers talk in little bursts. They're not continuous like speech...
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Democracy don't rule the world, You'd better get that in your head; This world is ruled by v...
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Inspiration is hard to come by. You have to take it where you find it.
BOB DYLAN
I felt like I might as well have been living in another part of the solar system.
BOB DYLAN
When you cease to exist, then who will you blame?
BOB DYLAN
I don't think the human mind can comprehend the past and the future. They are both just illusion...
BOB DYLAN
I change during the course of a day. I wake and I'm one person, and when I go to sleep I know fo...
BOB DYLAN
Some people seem to fade away but then when they are truly gone, it's like they didn't fade ...
BOB DYLAN
I'll let you be in my dreams if I can be in yours.
BOB DYLAN
There is nothing so stable as change.
BOB DYLAN
All I can do is be me, whoever that is.
BOB DYLAN
Having power and being in a position of power can really blur your judgement, and it's not alway...
BOB MORLEY
I never gave up, even when people told me I'd never make it.
BOB WICKMAN
My first presidential primary vote was for Bobby Kennedy.
BOB GUNTON
If I wasn't Bob Dylan, I'd probably think that Bob Dylan has a lot of answers myself.
BOB DYLAN
I signed a very modest $3,000 bonus with the Braves in Milwaukee. And my old man didn't have tha...
BOB UECKER
Wolves are very resourceful. All they need to survive is for people not to shoot them.
BOB FERRIS
In my native Boulder County, Colorado, the fracking fanatics are out in force. They are marching doo...
BOB BEAUPREZ
The real enemy" is the totality of physical and mental constraints by which capital, or class societ...
BOB BLACK
You are what you do. If you do boring, stupid monotonous work, chances are you'll end up boring, stu...
BOB BLACK
We wouldn't turn over our customs service or our border patrol to a foreign government. We shoul...
BOB MENENDEZ
Louis Braille created the code of raised dots for reading and writing that bears his name and brings...
BOB NEY
Not bragging by any means, but I could have done a lot of other stuff as far as working in films go ...
BOB UECKER
It's a good time to be in the content business though, the branded content business.
BOB IGER
I'm committed to increasing long-term value for shareholders and am confident we will continue t...
BOB IGER
Traditionally, art has been for the select few. We have been brainwashed to believe that Michelangel...
BOB ROSS
How long will they kill our prophets while we stand aside and look?
BOB MARLEY
My bladder cancer was related to smoking, and I think smoking kills people.
BOB SCHIEFFER
To get, give.
BOB ROTH
They say it is a wide road that leads to war and only a narrow path that leads home again.
BOB MASSIE
I accept chaos, I'm not sure whether it accepts me.
BOB DYLAN
A little learning is a dangerous thing, but a lot of ignorance is just as bad.
BOB EDWARDS
He’s not perfect. You aren’t either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can mak...
BOB MARLEY
Who are you to judge the life I live?
I know I'm not perfect
-and I don't live to be-
BOB MARLEY
I had no songs in my repertoire for commercial radio anyway. Songs about debauched bootleggers, moth...
BOB DYLAN
They all laughed when I said I'd become a comedian. Well, they're not laughing now.
BOB MONKHOUSE
The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.
BOB MARLEY
Wake up and live
BOB MARLEY
Your Worst Enemy Could Be Your Best Friend && Your Best Friend Your Worst Enemy
BOB MARLEY
In high seas or in low seas,
I'm gonna be your friend...
I'm gonna be your friend.
In...
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Don't Gain The World & Lose Your Soul, Wisdom Is Better Than Silver Or Gold.
BOB MARLEY
Behind every beautiful thing, there's some kind of pain.
BOB DYLAN
Get up, stand up, Stand up for your rights. Get up, stand up, Don't give up the fight.
BOB MARLEY
Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around....
BOB MARLEY
A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night, and in between he does wha...
BOB DYLAN
Act the way you'd like to be and soon you'll be the way you'd like to act.
BOB DYLAN
If she's amazing, she won't be easy. If she's easy, she won't be amazing. If she's worth it, you won...
BOB MARLEY
One love, one heart, one destiny.
BOB MARLEY
You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she lov...
BOB MARLEY
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability t...
BOB MARLEY
The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.
BOB HOPE
The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast. About Russia
BOB HOPE
Irish Americans are no more Irish than Black Americans are Africans.
BOB GELDOF
Money doesn't talk, it swears.
BOB DYLAN
Ingenuity, plus courage, plus work, equals miracles.
BOB RICHARDS
I am against nature. I don't dig nature at all. I think nature is very unnatural. I think the truly ...
BOB DYLAN
The best way to help poor people is to not be one of them.
BOB HARRINGTON
Don't let them fool ya,
Or even try to school ya! Oh, no!
We've got a mind of our own,
So g...
BOB MARLEY
A little learning is a dangerous thing, but a lot of ignorance is just as bad.
BOB EDWARDS
I like America, just as everybody else does. I love America, I gotta say that. But America will be j...
BOB DYLAN
You are what you think. You are what you go for. You are what you do!
BOB RICHARDS
I won it, at least five million times. Men who were stronger, bigger and faster than I was could hav...
BOB RICHARDS
Mental toughness is to physical as four is to one.
BOB KNIGHT
Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.
BOB HOPE
If you haven't got any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble.
BOB HOPE
Music can't change the world.
BOB GELDOF
She opened up a book of poems and handed it to me written by an Italian poet from the 13th century a...
BOB DYLAN
When I joined the Tour I studied the best players to see what they did that I didn't do. I came to t...
BOB TOSKI
When you're in a relationship, you're always surrounded by a ring of circumstances... joined togethe...
BOB SEGER
Go out and buy yourself a five-cent pencil and a ten-cent notebook and begin to write down some mill...
BOB GRINDE
A person is a success if they get up in the morning and gets to bed at night and in between does wha...
BOB DYLAN
Behind every successful man there's a lot of unsuccessful years.
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One of the great lessons I've learned in athletics is that you've got to discipline your life. No ma...
BOB RICHARDS
A faith to live by, a self to live with, and a purpose to live for.
BOB HARRINGTON
You learn from a conglomeration of the incredible past -- whatever experience gotten in any way what...
BOB DYLAN
I think of a hero as someone who understands the degree of responsibility that comes with his freedo...
BOB DYLAN
Is not that a great principle for all of living? The people who will really accomplish great things ...
BOB RICHARDS
Hate is such a luxurious emotion, it can only be spent on one we love.
BOB UDKOFF
Despite everybody who has been born and has died, the world has just gone on. I mean, look at Napole...
BOB DYLAN
To live outside the law, you must be honest.
BOB DYLAN
Just because you like my stuff doesn't mean I owe you anything.
BOB DYLAN
Fear of the pain blinds us to the goal of healing. Only by seeing our problems clearly and experienc...
BOB HOFFMAN
You have to penetrate a woman's defenses. Getting into her head is a prerequisite to getting into he...
BOB GUCCIONE
Don't matter how much money you got, there's only two kinds of people: there's saved people and ther...
BOB DYLAN
We know smoking tobacco is not good for kids, but a lot of other things aren't good. Drinking's not ...
BOB DOLE
In ceremonies of the horsemen, even the pawn must hold a grudge.
BOB DYLAN
Eulogies are like babies. They're more pleasurable to create than to deliver.
BOB BLAZICH
People seldom do what they believe in. They do what is convenient, then repent.
BOB DYLAN
He (Bob Marley) had this idea, it was kind of a virologist idea, he believed he could cure racism an...
BOB MARLEY
But even the President of the United States sometimes must have to stand naked.
BOB DYLAN
I
BOB HOPE
Maybe in the 90s or possibly in the next century people will look upon the 80s as the age of masturb...
BOB DYLAN
People today are still living off the table scraps of the sixties. They are still being passed aroun...
BOB DYLAN
The things which are most important don't always scream the loudest.
BOB HAWKE
I've been up the mountain and I had a choice. Should I come down? So I came down. God said, Okay, yo...
BOB DYLAN
Ah, but I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now.
BOB DYLAN
Whatever you do, don't do it halfway.
BOB BEAMON
Those who cultivate moral confusion for profit should understand this: we will name their names and ...
BOB DOLE
For them that think death's honesty won't fall upon them naturally life sometimes must get lonely.
BOB DYLAN
You can't always wait for the guys at the top. Every manager at every level in the organization has ...
BOB ANDERSON
Democracy don't rule the world, you better get that in your head; this world is ruled by violence, b...
BOB DYLAN
Well, I don't know, but I've been told the streets in heaven are lined with gold. I ask you how thin...
BOB DYLAN
If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.
BOB HOPE
Most people have the will to win, few have the will to prepare to win.
BOB KNIGHT