What happened out there?”

“I almost got quarking toasted by a dragon.”

“A dragon,” he repeats, scandalized. “Are you mad? Or have you been skulking around the bars of Barbary XIII?

When they figure out how to bottle up orgasms and sell them as a food additive, I'll be first in line.

Fairytales by nature only talk about the victors. The survivors. Nobody speaks about what happens to those who failed, except in the abstract: as cautionary tales to guide others onto the path to success. How many brave knights fell to the dragon before he was slayed by the noble prince? How many children burned to a crisp and eaten before the wicked witch received her due? These stories are lost, but the lesson behind them is not: it is not enough to be merely pure and good.

In trials of ir'n and silver fain
“The dead will rise and walk again
“The blesséd few that touch the light
“Will aid the war against the night.

“But one by one they all will die
“Without a cause to rule them by
“As Darkness spreads across the land
“He'll wield the oceans in his hand.

“Five warriors will oppose his reign
“And overthrow the Shadow Thane
“They come from sides both dark and light
“The realm the mortals call “twilight.”

“A magus crowned with boughs of fire
“Will rise like Phoenix from his pyre
“A beast of shadows touched with sight
“Will claim a Dark One as her knight

“The next, a prophet doomed to fail
“Will find her powers to avail
“The final: one mere mortal man
“Who bears the mark upon his hand

“The circle closes round these few
“Made sacred by the bonds they hew
“But if one fails then so shall all
“Bring death to those of Evenfall.

There wasn't a colloquial phrase, or curse, that went something like, "May your day be full of angry dragons" or, "May every dragon you meet today be pissed off." But, there should have been.

What goes up must come down, unless a dragon eats it.