They say there is other fish in the sea, thats why we masterbait

Love is a silhouette overshadowed by beauty.

My first time I jacked off, I thought I'd invented it. I looked down at my sloppy handful of junk and thought, This is going to make me rich.

Private moments held not a candle to coitus, not even the expensive kind of candle that made the whole room smell of far off seasons.

Today I will masterbate!

Okay, that was a mistake. I should have written "Today I will masterbate--if I want to!

Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century it was a disease; in the twentieth, it's a cure.