The patient says "Doctor, it hurts when I do this." "Then don't do that!"

Doctor, my leg hurts. What can I do?" The doctor says "Limp!

My doctor grabbed me by the wallet and said "Cough!"

A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months.

The room is so small, when I put the key in, I broke the window!

Times like these you wish you didn't manufacture such large pills to swallow...Because you become your own patient and you realize how cruel of a doctor you are.