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On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.


H. Allen Smith

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On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.
H. ALLEN SMITH Fourscore and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived i...
ABRAHAM LINCOLN Fourscore and seven years ago, our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived i...
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ABRAHAM LINCOLN Four score and seven years ago, our father brought forth upon this continent a new nation, conceived...
ABRAHAM LINCOLN Why work today? I'll take Tuesday on, just like I took Monday off. That's just the kind of dedicated...
WILL ADVISE Bowl good tonight and that's what he always told me on Monday mornings when I left cause I bowl Mond...
KAREN ORR Socialism" is no more an evil word than "Christianity." Socialism no more prescribed Joseph Stalin a...
KURT VONNEGUT Men are jerks. Women are psychotic.
KURT VONNEGUT JR. I am just like all the jerks and idiots you know. I am just a guy that watches sports all day.
BRIAN MCKNIGHT All I ever did to that apartment was hang fifty yards of yellow theatrical silk across the bedroom w...
JOAN DIDION We can never make proper goodbyes. It was your last ride in a Checker cab and you had no warning. It...
COLSON WHITEHEAD For all men are equal,in order to show man that you are equal,then always do things lesser than your...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) To prove that all men are equal, rich or poor,nature has made it compulsory for all to breath the sa...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) All men are created equal in the sense that no one can predict what numbers are coming out on lotter...
FLORD VIOUZRE That all men are equal is a proposition to which, at ordinary times, no sane individual has ever gi...
ALDOUS HUXLEY I am always the 'good guy', and I take on the idiotic jerks of the nation.
WALLY GEORGE Take me to the height where success would seek my help to succeed!
I ARE That all men are equal is a proposition to which, at ordinary times, no sane human being has ever gi...
ALDOUS HUXLEY That all men are equal is a proposition which, at ordinary times, no sane individual has ever given ...
ALDOUS HUXLEY That all men are equal is a proposition which at ordinary times no sane individual has ever given hi...
ALDOUS HUXLEY Meditation is coming into the workplace as stress management. Stress acts directly on productivity. ...
ERIC HARRISON Gun Owners of America is a lobby group dedicated to the proposition that the National Rifle Associat...
TIMOTHY NOAH We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men and women are created equal.
ELIZABETH CADY STANTON We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men and women are created equal.
ELIZABETH CADY STANTON We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men and women are created equal
ELIZABETH CADY STANTON If you really believe that all men are created equal, you are comfortable in any company.
MICHAEL LIPSEY Even after the dehadhyas (the belief that 'I am the body') has gone, people will say, "I saw you eat...
DADA BHAGWAN All men are created equal, it is only men themselves who place themselves above equality.
DAVID ALLAN COE This Nation was founded by men of many nations and backgrounds. It was founded on the principle that...
JOHN FITZGERALD KENNEDY This nation was founded by many men of many nations and backgrounds. It was founded on the principle...
JOHN F. KENNEDY Each week, just before the kickoff of Monday Night Football, thousands of bettors visit Bodog.com to...
CALVIN AYRE As a nation, we began by declaring that 'all men are created equal.' We now practically read it 'all...
ABRAHAM LINCOLN But guys such as Allen and William are more supportive than most men.
KATHY ACKER God created all things. It's men who decide which ones are mistakes.
BEAUTIFUL CREATURES The great thing about being a print journalist is that you are permitted to duck. Cameramen get kill...
P. J. O'ROURKE Our progress in degeneracy appears to me to be pretty rapid. As a nation, we began by declaring that...
ABRAHAM LINCOLN The two men had a conversation. Brief, cryptic, to the point. As though they had exchanged numbers a...
ARUNDHATI ROY I am very concerned about Barbara Streisand using the 'H' word - 'honkey.' That'...
PAUL MOONEY Lincoln once said that America was founded on a proposition that was written by Jefferson in 1776. W...
JOSEPH J. ELLIS Who am I? I am that. Nothing can change that. Words, intellect and concepts can never reach that. It...
AMIT RAY I am made all things to all men.
BIBLE The idea that men are created free and equal is both true and misleading: men are created different;...
DAVID RIESMAN I always talked with my family about being on television and now I am proud to say that after Monday...
ANTONIO WEBB Some people are [jerks]. They have to work at it. I was just born that way.
DALE LINDSEY Champions are built on a thousand invisible mornings.
KIRK COUSINS I am very much a person who enjoys mornings as much as evenings.
DIRK BENEDICT I am opening up a stud farm, ... I am going to have the sexiest men on earth. Women are going to lov...
HEIDI FLEISS All men are not created equal but should be treated as though they were under the law.
ANDY ROONEY I am overwhelmed, everything is new, incredible, amazing. On Monday, I went on my first excursion; a...
JAMES LONEY Strange department, this. Their motto was: "The comprehension of Infinity requires infinite time." I...
ARKADY STRUGATSKY We'll see how dedicated I am to the treadmill. That's the only way to get rid of it. I'm not a docto...
JOHN WADE The core of my work is dedicated not to pleasing women, but to pleasing men. Men are like bulls. The...
CHRISTIAN LOUBOUTIN Most women are all too familiar with men like Calvin Smith. Men whose sense of prerogative renders t...
JON KRAKAUER Food Allergies Are Not Due to Food, Rather Are Due to the Constant Contamination of That Food That Y...
THEHEALTHFOODGURU I am really happy for the city of Marseille. On Monday, everyone in the traffic jams will be happy.
FABIEN BARTHEZ I am really happy for the city of Marseille. On Monday, everyone in the traffic jams will be happy,
FABIEN BARTHEZ I need to be surrounded by people as passionate and as dedicated as I am.
LAURYN HILL When all are talking, no one is probably listening; but if no one is speaking then perhaps all are o...
ANUJ SOMANY I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up, live out the true meaning of its creed: we hol...
MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. It is impossible to think there is any other search firm as completely in tune with who we are in Al...
VICTORIA SUBLETTE There are jerks all over Washington. Life is short; being a jerk is just unnecessary.
MONA SUTPHEN When we were 1-2 after the Providence game, our players that following week re-dedicated themselves....
GLEN PADGETT Between Monday and Saturday men make an audience. On Sunday, they make a congregation.
MOKOKOMA MOKHONOANA The road to salvation is filled with many false dark turn-offs, if you take those roads they will le...
GARY F EVANS... Here I am, a nice Jewish mother, writing the Foreword for a book about Christian nice guys. Why? Bec...
LAURA SCHLESSINGER CEOs can talk and blab each day about culture, but the employees all know who the jerks are. They co...
JACK WELCH To the weak became I as weak, that I might gain the weak: I am made all things to all men, that I ...
BIBLE We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by th...
THOMAS JEFFERSON We hold these truths to be self evident: that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by th...
THOMAS JEFFERSON We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by the...
US DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by th...
THOMAS JEFFERSON We hold these truths to be self-evident,--that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by ...
THOMAS JEFFERSON We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by th...
THOMAS JEFFERSON You're not used to early mornings, are you?"
He shook his head. "Early mornings were invented b...
DEREK LANDY All men are created equal. Now matter how hard they try, they can never erase those words. That is w...
HARVEY MILK Thady begins his memoirs of the Rackrent Family by dating MONDAY MORNING, because no great undertaki...
MARIA EDGEWORTH That he dedicated to me so many hours — and this was extraordinary — I am happy that this was poss...
HANS KUENG That he dedicated to me so many hours ? and this was extraordinary ? I am happy that this was possib...
HANS KUENG It's embarrassing that we all just walk through life blindly accepting that scrambled eggs are funda...
JOHN GREEN My life is very monotonous," the fox said. "I hunt chickens; men hunt me. All the chickens are just ...
ANTOINE DE SAINT-EXUPéRY But, I've learned, as we all must, that adults are jerks too. At least some of them. And that's why ...
CLINTON KELLY I know this is going to sound corny, but I love my life. I love my baby, so I love getting to wake u...
JULIANNA MARGULIES Men are like trees: each one must put forth the leaf that is created in him.
HENRY WARD BEECHER All men are created equal. It is what you do from there that makes the difference. We are all free a...
GLENN BECK I don't know if I am a good cook, but I am a dedicated cook.
STELLAN SKARSGARD I am here today as an American citizen and an engineer whose life has been devastated by that (H-1B)...
DAVID HUBER Of the billionaires I have known, money just brings out the basic traits in them. If they were jerks...
WARREN BUFFETT I’m that bad, am I?” I whispered, lips trembling. I was going to bawl again. “In all the world...
ANNE RICE The Iraqi elections is all anyone is talking about, certainly all eyes are on that, ... I think if w...
ART HOGAN We hold these truths to be sacred & undeniable; that all men are created equal & independant, that f...
THOMAS JEFFERSON You philosophers are lucky men. You write on paper and paper is patient. Unfortunate Empress that I ...
CATHERINE THE GREAT You philosophers are lucky men. You write on paper and paper is patient. Unfortunate Empress that I ...
CATHERINE GREAT (Monday) night we struggled real bad without Josh Smith in the lineup, but we stick him back in ther...
WAYNE RICHARDSON My circumstances do not make me what I am, they reveal who I have chosen to be. (from James Allen).
WAYNE DYER We are all worms. But I believe that I am a glow-worm.
WINSTON CHURCHILL There are jerks who always want to treat you badly.
OLASOT In the spring of 1948, I was able to join the newly created Brookhaven National Laboratory, which wa...
RAYMOND DAVIS, JR. Slavery is a sin when whites were put to the yoke, but not the African. All men are created equal, u...
COLSON WHITEHEAD You are the ultimate freedom, peace and bliss - free from the trace of desire, fear and doubts.
AMIT RAY

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H. H. SWAMI TEJOMAYANANDA A narrow vision is divisive, a broad vision expansive. But a divine vision is all-inclusive.
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H. H. SWAMI TEJOMAYANANDA Be tender towards the fault of others, be strict towards your own.
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H MATHEWS Keep high aspirations, moderate expectations and small needs.
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H. OGILVIE If .. 'Ifs and buts' were candy and nuts...oh, what a party we would have.
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ALFA H However this life is unbalanced
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H. ALAZHAR If all your peers understand what you've done, it's not creative.
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ALFA H I get meals when I can, or I have protein shakes.
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TRIPLE H I have no doubt that Taylor Swift will call one day after suffering writers block: "Alfa, I was told...
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TRIPLE H Happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you have.
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ALFA H There is lonely, and there is alone time. I have found that both have etched character upon my soul.
ALFA H Aspire to never have a boss.
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H. MORTARA If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
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TIM ALLEN I went in saying I wanted to be the food guy.
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TED ALLEN I'm a home cook and love to read about food, but I'm not trained as a chef. I'm just rea...
TED ALLEN To me, the kitchen is a place of adventure and entirely fun, not drudgery. I can't think of anyt...
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TED ALLEN Believe me, I understand the need for easy and speedy. After a 12-hour day of shooting 'Chopped,...
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TED ALLEN When the idea of 'Chopped' surfaced, it was originally meant to be taped at some guy's m...
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TED ALLEN Without a good cultural policy, without adequate help, we will always have individualists, shooting ...
RALPH ALLEN I paint according to the moment and the theme. I don't have any prejudice. Life concerns me.
RALPH ALLEN People are predominant in my paintings. Although they are not obvious, you can feel their presence.
RALPH ALLEN I worked three and then six hours a day in my studio with strict discipline and emotion. I obtained ...
RALPH ALLEN At that time, the academic orientation was rather technical contrary to that of the university, wher...
RALPH ALLEN The magic of creation has always fascinated me.
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WOODY ALLEN I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
WOODY ALLEN I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker.
WOODY ALLEN If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very in...
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KAREN ALLEN People want to see a movie that casts a mature woman across from a mature man.
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KAREN ALLEN I feel as though I would be delighted to come back into working in the film world, and working in th...
KAREN ALLEN If there are no other wonderful roles that come my way, I have a quite an interesting, dynamic life.
KAREN ALLEN The secrecy thing has gotten to be more and more prevalent in films, and maybe that's good. It&#...
KAREN ALLEN A lot of times when I've been offered film series and stuff, if they shoot in Los Angeles, I los...
KAREN ALLEN I don't necessarily like being defined by my profession.
KAREN ALLEN I find myself really feeling like it's possible that maybe the greater contribution I'm goin...
KAREN ALLEN I said to myself, 'I've waited a long time in my life to have a child, and I'm missing i...
KAREN ALLEN Let's just say I decided that while my son is young I don't want to do projects that would t...
KAREN ALLEN As far as acting in films, there is not much out there that is very interesting to do. The ones that...
KAREN ALLEN Eventually you love people - friends or lovers - because of their flaws.
KAREN ALLEN I'm about as healthy as a person can be. I quit smoking seven or eight years ago.
KAREN ALLEN My son was born somewhat late in my life and I just found myself really feeling like I didn't wa...
KAREN ALLEN I've never done anything for money. My first love is things of limited commercial appeal. I coul...
KAREN ALLEN I thought, I need to reinvent myself. I want every day of life to be wonderful, fascinating, interes...
KAREN ALLEN I don't know if I've ever played a character who's close to me. There have been some ele...
KAREN ALLEN Idleness does drive me crazy, but I'd rather read or write than do anything just to work. A kind...
KAREN ALLEN I loved living and breathing theatre so much that I decided I had to find a way to bring my desire t...
KAREN ALLEN I just felt like I had to create a life for myself where I was more independent.
KAREN ALLEN You know, I don't really understand a suburban environment. I want to be out in the woods, I wan...
KAREN ALLEN I've always done things the hard way. I was born like a piece of tangled yarn. The job is trying...
KAREN ALLEN What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car...
WOODY ALLEN What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?
WOODY ALLEN If I have committed any culinary atrocities, please forgive me.
TED ALLEN A man is not rightly conditioned until he is a happy, healthy, and prosperous being; and happiness, ...
JAMES ALLEN There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman...
WOODY ALLEN So now is an opportunity for us to stand up and have a good, strong immigration policy to make sure ...
ALLEN WEST Stem cell research holds out the promise of finding cures and treatments for a wide range of disease...
TOM ALLEN No temptation can gravitate to a man unless there is that is his heart which is capable of respondin...
JAMES ALLEN A man is literally what he thinks.
JAMES ALLEN The man who sows wrong thoughts and deeds and prays that God will bless him is in the position of a ...
JAMES ALLEN The law of harvest is to reap more than you sow. Sow an act, and you reap a habit. Sow a habit and y...
JAMES ALLEN You can hide from the devil, but he'll always find you.
ALLEN IVERSON The little platoon of the black community is the church. Our Christian faith is based on individual ...
ALLEN WEST I don't want to just go to the playoffs, I don't want to go to the playoffs and win the firs...
ALLEN IVERSON There's a lot of bitterness, there's a lot of anger out there. We all have to work hard to h...
ALLEN BOYD The three theater peeps I would love to dine with are Mel Brooks, because he is so funny; Stephen So...
NANCY ALLEN God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.
WOODY ALLEN Michael Ralph brilliantly plays the street prophet, a West Indian who foreshadows the Harlem riot.
DEBBIE ALLEN I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. . . I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN The weight of the world is love. Under the burden of solitude, under the burden of dissatisfaction.
ALLEN GINSBERG Nobody saves America by sniffing cocaine. Jiggling your knees blankeyed in the rain, when it snows i...
ALLEN GINSBERG I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked, dragging them...
ALLEN GINSBERG Whoever controls the media, the images, controls the culture.
ALLEN GINSBERG Trust free people and free enterprise as opposed to meddling, burdensome government.
GEORGE ALLEN In my experience, it's all wonderful with girls until about 16. Around that time, boys kind of c...
TIM ALLEN Every year, thousands of Californians flee that populous paradise for tax-eased small government oas...
ALLEN WEST The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.
WOODY ALLEN From 1971 onwards, the Memorial Day holiday was officially observed on the last Monday in May and be...
ALLEN WEST The argument on the other side of special rights is completely bogus. It's bogus because you cou...
TOM ALLEN I've experienced (more times than I like to admit) avoiding slightly uncomfortable conversations wit...
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DAVID ALLEN The base salaries for all management employees are being reviewed with those below market to be adju...
DAVID ALLEN By printing cases on-line, these printers provide a dependable means to substantially reduce packagi...
DAVID ALLEN This partnership of resources is a positive for our customers and farmers.
DAVID ALLEN There's a subtle but critical difference between something that is long term and something in the ca...
DAVID ALLEN We're still waiting to hear what resources are needed.
DAVID ALLEN We were playing hardball and almost twisting their arm.
DAVID ALLEN I think it's just something to mislead the jury. And I don't think there's a problem anyway, because...
DAVID ALLEN The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to m...
WOODY ALLEN There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and w...
WOODY ALLEN I think all of those things, but certainly the booze really brought out the really unreasonable side...
RICK ALLEN Sex is nature's way of saying 'Hi!'
WOODY ALLEN Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting any
WOODY ALLEN