None of us can have as many virtues as the fountain-pen, or half its cussedness; but we can try

Be good and you will be lonesome.

Chastity - you can carry it too far

There are those who would misteach us that to stick in a rut is consistency- and a virtue; and that to climb out of the rut is inconsistency- and a vice

Virtue has never been as respectable as money

Let us endeavor to live so that when we die even the undertaker will be sorry