No sense in being pessimistic. It wouldn't work anyway.

When I can't sleep I count the buckles on my straightjacket.

The only type of men Julia's mother had warned her about were wealthy industrialist who polluted the environment and took advantage of third-world countries. And Republilicans.

One can only tolerate the absolute idiocy of Man for so long before bringing out the bat.

When things are at their blackest, I say to myself, 'Cheer up, things could be worse.' And sure enough, they get worse.

I hope to-morrow will be a fine day, Lane.
It never is, sir.
Lane, you're a perfect pessimist.
I do my best to give satisfaction, sir.