My mother still sends a cake to the office for my birthday.

The birthday party was me and her, a whore friend of hers and her pimp, and the cake.

I didn't have a birthday cake this year,

I've always enjoyed real work more than schoolwork. My mother will attest to that - she was always concerned about me academically.

when I counted the candles on my birthday cake and cringed.

Romance novels are birthday cake and life is often peanut butter and jelly. I think everyone should have lots of delicious romance novels lying around for those times when the peanut butter of life gets stuck to the roof of your mouth.