Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another.

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.

Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody may be looking.

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.

Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.

A professor must have a theory as a dog must have fleas.