Jackie Mason Freshly Squeezed.

I was like a Borscht Belt comedian trapped in the body of a 6-year-old. I was channeling Jackie Mason at 7.

Twice in one day?" I asked. "And how'd you even get up here?”
He flashed his easy smile. "Someone put a lit match in one of the bathroom's garbage cans. Damn shame. The staff's kind of busy. Come on, I'm springing you.”
I shook my head. Setting fires was apparently a new sign of affection. Christian had done it and now Mason.

We relish news of our heroes, forgetting that we are extraordinary to somebody too.

Age is not important unless you're a cheese.

The worst constructed play is a Bach fugue when compared to life.