It's a cosmic joke that I'm a lesbian, because I understand men so well but women are a complete mystery to me.


Lea DeLaria

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Women. They are a complete mystery.
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Women! I have no idea. I don't know anything about women at all. They're a complete mystery to me.
BRYAN FERRY
God's great cosmic joke on the human race was requiring that men and women live together in marriage
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I became a lesbian because of women, because women are beautiful, strong, and compassionate.
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Women! I have no idea. I don't know anything about women at all. They're a complete mystery ...
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Women who love women are Lesbians. Men, because they can only think of women in sexual terms, define...
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When the candles are out all women are fair
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So few grown women like their lives
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As a male writer, women are always what men pursue, and their world is always a mystery. So I always...
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She filed the image away as an excellent and insulting question to ask the earl at an utterly inappr...
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By the side of the everlasting Why there is a Yes--a transitory Yes if you like, but a Yes.
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A Ritual to Read to Each Other


If you don’t know the kind of person I am
and...
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And verily, a woman need know but one man well, in order to understand all men; whereas a man may kn...
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So, let me get this straight-- You want me to stop being a lesbian and being attracted to women beca...
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He feared me as many men fear women: because their mistresses (or their wives) understand them. They...
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What's the point of being a lesbian if a woman is going to look and act like an imitation man?
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I love men, not because they are men, but because they are not women
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The story goes as the line follow... alone... loony....
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That's what's happening....
DEYTH BANGER
Save your ass, give my ass.... what a friend you are...
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But men and women, getting along, it's a joke. We have completely different brains, it's a completel...
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GARY F EVANS...
If tomorrow was yesterday then yesterday would be tomorrow, if we think about the past why not think...
GARY F EVANS...
Start seeing a way for yourself. Stop seeing a way for others.
APURVA GAGLANI
and the girl and I get into her car and drive off into the hills and we go to her room and I take of...
BRET EASTON ELLIS
Women...are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.
JAMES STEPHENS
Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.
JAMES THURBER
Im okay Im okay now.
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Well, you can't know it without something having been sneezed.
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Even longer,' Pooh answered.”
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You create beauty with your attitude,you make an impression with your behaviour,you make statements ...
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It's loud, it's cheap, it's gaudy. It's like everything I've ever done - I LOVE IT!
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The older I get, the more convinced I am that humanity is a cosmic joke. We are the joke of the anim...
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He wanted to buy me a Cadillac. But I only saw hard men and rough women in those cars. So he bought ...
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I always say that bad women are fewer than men, but when you get one, they're fascinating because th...
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If you love the mystery aspect, then its a great position because there are so many things you can d...
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I finally realized why I am so crazy about women... I am, in fact, a lesbian trapped in a man's body...
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When the woman in the audience at my talk said "I survived lesbian feminism and still desire women",...
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Aside from all that, she was carrying about a million tons of titanium ore to the heavy industries o...
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People love a good mystery; I understand that.
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A tooth for a tooth, will make the world's inhabitants a people without teeth
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Why, darling, I don't live at all when I'm not with you.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY
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He said we were all cooked but we were all right as long as we did not know it. We were all cooked. ...
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-- by John VanDyke Wilmerding II

this is my letter to a young ...
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Yes, their reasons are overwhelming. They are as big as hope and as deep as revolt. They are the rea...
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…A city deprived of everything, devoid of light and devoid of heat, starved, and still not crushed...
ALBERT CAMUS
Words always take on the color of the deeds or sacrifices they evoke.
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No, no. Don't make that face. Every time I propose to you, you make that twisty, unhappy face. It we...
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Atticus---" ...said Jem bleakly. "How could they do it, how could they?"
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We are born different to make a difference.
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Dreams can change histories and songs can alter destinies.
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