If life deals you lemons, why not go kill someone with the lemons (maybe by shoving them down his throat).
Jack Handy
Related
When life hands you lemons go ahead and throw them at someone.
KEVIN HAMMONS If life hands you lemons,keep them. Because, hey, free lemons.-T-Shirt
DARYNDA JONES When life gives you lemons, throw them at someone.
SEAN KEVIN SWEENEY When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.
CATHY GUISEWITE All right, I've been thinking, when life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade! Make life take the l...
PORTAL 2 When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't wa...
J.K. SIMMONS When life gives you lemons, throw them back.
DAN WALDSCHMIDT I been thinken'. when life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade!! get mad! I dont want your damn le...
CAVE JOHNSON PORTAL 2 When Life Gives You Lemons you tell life to Get a Life because lemons are a terrible gift.
PATRICK SCHELL When life gives you lemons, you throw them at the Government
SEANCITYNAVY When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Then find someone who's life is givin' them vodka and...
RON WHITE If Life Gives You Lemons, Make a Molotov Cocktail
DEAN CAVANAGH I believe if life gives you lemons make lemonade…then find someone that life gave vodka to and hav...
RON WHITE I believe if life gives you lemons make lemonade
then find someone that life gave vodka to and have...
RON WHITE As you go about your daily life, you will encounter many lemons. Sour expressions, sour attitudes, s...
C. JOYBELL C. If life gives you lemons, make some kind of fruity juice.
CONAN O'BRIEN When life gives you lemons, you exchange them at the store for something more edible.
GRACE HELBIG If life gives you lemons, pray for fruit, fruit of the Holy Spirit.
N. J. SALAVEENA When life gives you lemons... choke on them and die... you stupid lemon eater.
SCOTT ADAMS When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
UNKNOWN CHRISTIAN I believe when life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade...and try to find someone whose life ...
RON WHITE I don't want someone shoving his views down my throat, unless they're covered in a crunchy candy she...
STEPHEN COLBERT When life gives you lemons, order the lobster tail.
ZIAD K. ABDELNOUR When life gives you lemons, make assless chaps.
ANGIE WEST When life gives you lemons, use Cosmic Ordering!
STEPHEN RICHARDS When life gives you lemons, sell them and buy a pineapple. How to better your life 101.
DAVIN TURNEY When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back.
BILL WATTERSON When life gives you lemons! Make a fruit salad!
LULU MARES When life gives you lemons, make sure you know whose eyes you need to squeeze them in.
COLLEEN HOOVER See, Red? When life hands you lemons, you know what you gotta do?”
“Wow,” Lauren said. �...
PRISCILLA GLENN When life hands you lemonade, don't try to make lemons
VINCE GUTHRIE When life gives you lemons, say cool, what else you got?
CARMEN IN THE SISTERHOOD OF THE TRAVELING PANTS When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, and then throw it in the face of the person who gave you ...
CASSANDRA CLARE when life gives you lemon, take it. don't waste food
GISELLE MARQUEZ I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose ...
RON WHITE If life hands you lemons, make lemonade! Words to live by, especially when you kept in mind t...
STEPHEN KING When life gives you lemons you're not always going to have sugar and water at hand.
AMANDA CASH When life gives you lemons, make them into lemonade. No matter how bad, it will give you the strengt...
MYLYN YAMPAN When life hands you lemons, get yourself some limes because life can't be trusted.
- SAFAYA CARBON When life gives you lemons, do NOT make lemonade. Lemonade is for losers. Make orange juice instead.
NESHIALY S. When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. I have several stands around here.
JAMES BRADY See, Red? When life hands you lemons, you know what you gotta do now."
"Yes, Mr. Cliche. I know...
PRISCILLA GLENN When life gives you lemons, follow the five-step plan:
1.Sit on the couch.
2.Turn on the T...
ANONYMOUS Life keeps throwing me lemons because I make the best lemonade...
KING JAMES GADSDEN when life give me a lemon, i make myself an iced tea. mixed it up, it became my favorite
AYET LEE CYRUS WINDWALKER We live in a world where lemonade is made from aritificial flavoring and furniture polish is made fr...
MAD MAGAZINE My living in Yorkshire was so far out of the way, that it was
actually twelve miles from a lemon.
SYDNEY SMITH If life gives you lemons...you know you have a Herculean hangover. Either that, or you're holding Te...
PRABHUDOSS SAMUEL If life gives you lemons, don't settle for simply making lemonade - make a glorious scene at a l...
ELIZABETH GILBERT Twisting lemons into lemonade.
PETER DUCHAN When life hands you a lemon, say, "Oh yeah, I like lemons. What else ya got?"
HENRY ROLLINS When life gives you lemons...add melted butter , toasted paprike and dip some lobster in it!
STUART J. SCESNEY When life gives you lemons...add melted butter , toasted paprik and dip some lobster in it!
STUART J. SCESNEY When life gives you lemons...add melted butter , toasted paprika and dip some lobster in it!
STUART J. SCESNEY When life gives you lemons, say Fuck that i order apples. Dont take anything but apples.
CHRIS MACHADO See, Red? When life hands you lemons, you know what you gotta do
now.”
“Wow,” Lauren...
PRISCILLA GLENN When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and let the rest of the world wonder how you did it.
MARIA Talk about turning lemons into lemonade!
CATHERINE HAPKA It’s like being offered lemonade after having something really sweet. The lemonade was wonderful b...
KELLYN ROTH Says Momma: “I got handed lemons, too, y’know but I learned how to make lemonade with them… No...
ELIZABETH FLOCK When life throws a lemon at you, you throw it straight back at life and miss completely. That's my l...
ANONYMOUS Life is like a big green lemon. You can decide to add something sweet to it to reduce it's bitternes...
NANA ADJOA SAAM IRENE NYAME YE AGGREY-FYNN When life gives you lemons ask it for sugar and water too. Otherwise your final product would be som...
PRIYAVRAT GUPTA I love fresh citrus and always keep lemons, limes, and oranges on hand; they come in handy for sprit...
EMERIL LAGASSE When life gives you lemonade, be unique and sell it for a profit
NIKHIL RAO AND KATHERINE REITER Lemons clean everything. It's the greatest disinfectant.
SANDRA BULLOCK In all my work, I try to say - 'You may be given a load of sour lemons, why not try to make a do...
MAYA ANGELOU When life throws you lemons you make lemonade,When life throws you trash throw it out, feeling extre...
BONNIE ZACKSON KOURY In life they're not going to serve you lemons, they're going to serve you lemonade; and I don't real...
FELICIA DAY When life gives you lemons, you don't make lemonade. You use the seeds to plant a whole orchard - an...
ANTHON ST. MAARTEN When life gives you lemons, make grape juice...then everyone will look at you funny and think to the...
JAMIE K. BATES ... And the boy whose hair remained the color of lemons forever.
MARKUS ZUSAK Frostpine made a face. Lifting the cup, he dumped its contents down his throat. “Auugghh!” he ye...
TAMORA PIERCE [The purchase] is like a daydream of a used car salesman; we paid big bucks for lemons, ... We're bu...
KEITH ASHDOWN Hollywood's video marketers excel at making lemonade out of lemons.
TOM ADAMS When life gives you lemons. . . You might as well shove 'em where the sun don't shine, because you s...
ROB THURMAN As far as I'm concerned, there are two types of people in this world: people like Queeg who, when li...
MELISSA DECARLO You can made it anything you want it to be. I've taken a lot of lemons and make lemonade.
PHALANGE J. WORD Never throw away squeezed lemon, but keep them for the day by the sink. Then you can use them to rem...
JENNIFER PATERSON That's the silver lining. They gave us lemons and we made lemonade.
CHARLES LEACH Usually my form of turning someone down was shoving a stake through his heart while smirking, Gotcha...
JEANIENE FROST Those are a lot of tough questions. The question is: Can you make lemonade out of these lemons?
JEFFREY FINKLE Love is spending the rest of your life with someone you want to kill & not doing it because you'd mi...
SOMEECARDS Plants are more courageous than almost all human beings: an orange tree would rather die than produc...
MOKOKOMA MOKHONOANA This is kind of weird, but I eat lemons with salt as snack. They're so good!
BECKY G I want to make lemonade out of the lemons that were dealt to me.
BARON HILL We've got a lemon factory and we're turning out 80-85 percent lemons.
ALBERT SHANKER It just offends my sensibility to see all these Meyer lemons out there that no one's doing anything ...
WENDY CARROLL If someone was going to kill someone dear to you, and you could stop that person by killing them ins...
A.J. DARKHOLME It looks pretty bad with the lemons, and I know that we've got damage in the navel orange groves as ...
BOB KRAUTER Lemons. He liked lemons. They made you make funny faces when you bit them, and a very, very long way...
NICK HARKAWAY If he's ready, then we'd look at it. But we're not going to go in there and jam it down his throat.
MIKE EAVES Beyond making lemonade out of lemons it's the idea that out of destruction comes creation.
BONNIE CLEARWATER If you can kill them, why can't you spy on them?
CASS R. SUNSTEIN and then I decided I was a lemon for a couple of weeks.
DOUGLAS ADAMS If you find someone that you think is your soul-mate, someone you could potentially spend the rest o...
ELVIRA KURT I think life gives you lemons, and the thing that I'm working on doing is not watering it down, ...
CAM I always thought that what Rajima did with those cast-off peels was a metaphor for how she dealt wit...
PADMA LAKSHMI You don't accomplish a lot by changing people's opinions by shoving facts down their throat....
MARY LAMBERT Why would I go looking for someone I know wants to kill me?
J.K. ROWLING
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JACK PALANCE Perfectionists are their own devils.
JACK KIRBY Control your own destiny or someone else will.
JACK WELCH I believe that people make their own luck by great preparation and good strategy.
JACK CANFIELD If you pick the right people and give them the opportunity to spread their wings and put compensatio...
JACK WELCH Mankind is like dogs, not gods - as long as you don't get mad they'll bite you - but stay ma...
JACK KEROUAC If I have a weakness, it's probably ice cream. That's where I get lax, sloppy. I'll snea...
JACK NICKLAUS It was only after the Grimms published two editions primarily for adults that they changed their att...
JACK ZIPES Though the Grimms kept about 100 of the tales from the first edition, they changed them a good deal.
JACK ZIPES In 1995, I founded a storytelling program for children called Neighborhood Bridges in collaboration ...
JACK ZIPES I have a daughter, Hanna, and I never read fairy tales to her. But I did tell her bedtime tales and ...
JACK ZIPES 'Once Upon a Time', 'Mirror Mirror' - those shows and films focus on women and their...
JACK ZIPES Fairy tales are with us day in and day out, not just in commercials, but references in the theater, ...
JACK ZIPES The Grimm collections were never intended for children. Not because kids were excluded, but because ...
JACK ZIPES Almost every single commercial on television for shampoo, sports shoes, drinks, food, clothes, perfu...
JACK ZIPES What the Greeks and Romans considered myths, we consider fairy tales. We can see how very clearly th...
JACK ZIPES Until I was diagnosed with mouth cancer, I'd never heard of it.
JACK WILD I guess I'll go to my grave as the Dodger, but at least I've made my mark on show-business h...
JACK WILD I'm thought of as a celebrity. Everything I've ever done... has been for children. As long a...
JACK WILD I look at what I've gone through in my career and I really shouldn't be talking to you now. ...
JACK WILD I'd definitely be up for 'EastEnders.' Just the same as I would if 'Coronation Stree...
JACK WILD It's very hard not to let fame affect you because you are continually being told how good you ar...
JACK WILD There is no buzz like performing for a live audience.
JACK WILD At an age when most youngsters are preparing for their GCSEs, I was suddenly a jet-setter, briefly t...
JACK WILD My lifestyle had made me a walking time bomb.
JACK WILD I know who Jack Whittaker is. And some days I don't like who I am.
JACK WHITTAKER It doesn't bother me because I can tell everyone to kiss off.
JACK WHITTAKER