I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again.

I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself.

I love acting, but it's all just a bonus.

If you compulsively pun you are called a paronomasiac.

Now you know those trick candles that you blow out and a couple of seconds.

So I said to the gym instructor: 'Can you teach me to do the splits?' He said: 'How flexible are you?' I said: I can't make Tuesdays.'