I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.

Woody Allen

Woody Allen

Related Quotes

Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she would come in and sink my boats.

— Woody Allen

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.

— Woody Allen

A "Bay Area Bisexual" told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.

— Woody Allen

Ninety percent of success is showing up.

— Woody Allen

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.

— Woody Allen