I see TV ads about detergents that can get blood stains out of your cloths. I say if you have blood stains on your cloths you should be thinking about something other than laundry
Jerry Seinfield
Related Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths, Enwrought with golden and silver light, The blue an... W.B. YEATS Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths, Enwrought with golden and silver light, The blue and ... WILLIAM BUTLER YEATS Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths, Enwrought with golden and silver light, The blue and the dim ... WILLIAM BUTLER YEATS If something unexpectedly changes -- say your blood pressure level -- you want to be the first to kn... CARRIE GODES Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you'... JERRY SEINFELD Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you'... JERRY SEINFELD I love old books. They tell you stories about their use. You can see where the fingerprints touched ... JACK BOWMAN Yeah, man. You know those ads on TV about not slapping your kids? I don't know if our parents ever s... AWA REEDER How can justice be attained when, in the expiation of an old wrong, another wrong is to be committed... BERTHA VON SUTTNER Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you&... JERRY SEINFELD Romance is thinking about your significant other, when you are supposed to be thinking about somethi... NICHOLAS SPARKS But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread sof... W.B. YEATS Unless you have a blue dress from the Gap with stains on it, how are you going to be able to argue a... JEAN BAKER Is it a very wicked place?" I asked, more for the sake of saying something than for information. CHARLES DICKENS for the fifth time this month you say you’re going to leave him he calls you a cunt over... WARSAN SHIRE There is a fountain filled with blood / Drawn from Emmanuel's veins; / And sinners, plunged beneath ... WILLIAM COWPER Your words leave toxic stains - speakin' out the back end, not the brain. DEDRICK D. L. PITTER If you're a Bond fan of any sort, you're going to be interested, ... It's something that gets into y... GRAHAM RYE I'm a hybrid, and I kind of like that. Raised by African parents, growing up I lived between Bur... JACKY IDO Crap, are you thinking what I'm thinking?" "I'm thinking we have about fifteen vampires a... RACHEL CAINE Don't be superior. Everyone drinks blood. Blood is a word that means alive. You can do without almos... CATHERYNNE M. VALENTE When the blood dries, the stains will remain and there will be a challenge to us, that we have to fi... ATAL BEHARI VAJPAYEE It's from a strange place. The handwriting doesn't look right. There are stains on it. You can feel ... JEFFREY KOPLAN Prime Minister, you have blood on your hands. EHUD BARAK I read a poem once that had a line in it about a white radiance that stains eternity. JAMES LEE BURKE I keep thinking about blood, I dream about it. Wake up thinking about it. Pretty soon I'll be writin... CASSANDRA CLARE I love it. I love the immediacy of it. I love the spontaneity of it, ... I love the fact that every ... RYAN SEACREST It's one of the things that makes us different than they are, Harry. The blood on their hands does n... JIM BUTCHER The purpose of fear, clearly, is to help you get away - which it does. If your heart rate increases,... SY MONTGOMERY I don’t understand what makes them come out like that!”“Hunger,” said Jem. “Were you think... CASSANDRA CLARE It kind of gets into your blood and you can to talk to runners who will say that. KATIE WATTS I think you've got to stay out of your own way. That's the worst thing that can happen to you if you... CHAD CAMPBELL If I ask you to think about something, you can decide not to. But if I make you feel something? Now ... LISA CRON I'm a little bit phobic about stains on my clothes, so I never travel without a little packet of... JOHN MALKOVICH I don't worry about whether I'm making a masterpiece, because I know that if you get just on... MALCOLM MCDOWELL You can't be sorry for something that let's see, how can I say this? I'm on appeal, ... You don't ap... MARTHA STEWART Let's see if I can write about something other than my heart. GARY SHTEYNGART You can also look at your body and think about how the blood flows and the fact that your body is in... CELSO CUKIERKORN Lenore, it's simply that I love you. You know that. Every fiber of your being is loved by every fibe... DAVID FOSTER WALLACE You must remember, family is often born of blood, but it doesn't depend on blood. Nor is it exclusiv... TRENTON LEE STEWART I get letters from women, and they say, 'I love your Roman nose.' If I weren't on TV and I walked pa... MATT LAUER You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type PHYLLIS DILLER You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type. PHYLLIS DILLER You can take the barbarian out of the tavern, but he can take the blood out of your body. GREG X. GRAVES Don’t be upset. Don’t listen to me. I only meant that I am jealous of a dark, unconscious elemen... BORIS PASTERNAK Your idea of that dish has evolved, and if you're a cook, you can start thinking in different ways a... THOMAS KELLER Do you know what my father used to say?" I ask her. "He used to say that songs had a heart. A cresce... LAUREN DESTEFANO Some say your whole life appears before you like a TV when someone is about to shoot you, but the re... DAUGLAS DAUGLAS My dad always said that 90 percent of marital problems could be solved by getting your blood sugar u... CASEY WILSON Your blood thins out down here, so they say. DENNIS MINER Shigure: Perhaps I can offer some advice? ...You know, Tohru-kun, when you get anxiety about the fut... NATSUKI TAKAYA Why are you offering me ten thousand dollars a month for babysitting? You didn’t pay the nannies t... JENNIFER CRUSIE If I had a razor, I'd cut your throat - just to see what ran out of it." "Caterpillar blo... RAYMOND CHANDLER It's easier not to say anything. Shut your trap, button your lip, can it. All that crap you hear on ... LAURIE HALSE ANDERSON Family isn't about whose blood you have. It's about who you care about. TREY PARKER AND MATT STONE Doubts are like stains on a shirt. I like shirts with stains, because when I'm given a shirt that's ... ANTONIO TABUCCHI The word "yoga" literally means "uniting," because when you're doing it you're uniting your mind and... ELLEN DEGENERES I mean, if your idea belongs on cable TV than that's where you should take it and you shouldn't try ... BOB ODENKIRK You give me your blood and I will give you Independence! NETAJI SUBHASH CHANDRA BOSE It’s your hero complex, isn’t it? You should see someone about that.” “Right after I g... BRYNN KELLY Your life is enough, don’t be concerned with others. And I tell you that if you can live unconcern... BHAGWAN SHREE RAJNEESH I was too excited to be nervous about it, ... I felt comfortable and was excited to be on national T... BRANDON DAVIS I know it's really though on coach to see us play like that. It's just something you have to get out... MARVIN WILLIAMS I think you should only take your dog if it can get along with other dogs. BETH PATTERSON The word "yoga" literally means "uniting", because when you're doing it you are uniting your mind an... ELLEN DEGENERES Something your father wouldn't have told you, he began. Taking blood, it leaves a mark on you. No ma... J.D. ROBB If poetry is like an orgasm, an academic can be likened to someone who studies the passion-stains on... IRVING LAYTON When you see the coals, your first reaction is to think 'my God, that's going to burn me', ... If so... IAN HOLLOWAY Excess dietary salt is most notorious for increasing blood pressure. Americans have a 90 percent lif... JOEL FUHRMAN It's not that your back hurts, ... You get these horrible, ice cream brain-freeze headaches. So I wo... GEORGE CLOONEY You have it in your blood and you transmit that to the student. HECTOR VINENT Your soul is drenched black with the blood of your victims, my dear, and that is why you can't see i... MARIA V. SNYDER I'd much rather have the honesty than not. Because if you will say what's on your mind and g... GARTH BROOKS If you have a valuable asset on your laptop or home machine, you should be worried about this attack... FRED RICA We make a contract within ourselves as actors or directors or writers about how much of ourselves we... AJAY NAIDU I find myself looking at the ocean, and thinking of you. I have wondered if at that moment you are t... SHANE J VAN DER VELDE I confess that altruistic and cynically selfish talk seem to me about equally unreal. With all humil... OLIVER WENDELL HOLMES, JR. I say to you that the price of liberty is and always has been blood, human blood, and if our liberti... J. REUBEN CLARK Keep calm. You have the forest in your blood. NENIA CAMPBELL My father once said, 'If you're in the desert and you're dying of thirst, are you going ... NICOLAS CAGE If you're with a close friend, your anger may raise his blood pressure as well as your own, wher... DEAN ORNISH Here he tells us that the new birth is first of all 'not of blood'. You don't get it thr... E. STANLEY JONES Dear young woman, do not place your sense of beauty and self worth, upon the plastic pedestal called... C. JOYBELL C. If you have cold or flu symptoms, you can't donate because you don't want those viruses to be transm... JAN GORDON Blood relatives often have nothing to do with family, and similarly, family is about who you choose ... OLIVER HUDSON Now you can go back and tell your client, 'They have a lab report, and it shows you had the blood of... DAN WYDE My Style Stains MARIA LUSSIER He let out a hiss of pain,then smiled that crooked, sheepish smile he always fell back on when he wa... HOLLY BLACK I really do think snacking is the key to dieting. We know if you can steady your blood sugar, then y... PATTI MILLIGAN When I see my staff take a step back because I've lost my cool about something food-related, I s... CURTIS STONE As I see it, you are living with something that you keep hidden deep inside. Something heavy. I felt... HARUKI MURAKAMI You have to go the way your blood beats. If you don't live the only life you have, you won't live so... JAMES ARTHUR BALDWIN Charles, mate, you fret too much. I'm a grown man, I am, and I can blood my handle." "Handle yo... JEANIENE FROST If you consume too much salt, it can cause water retention. When this happens, your body usually res... MICHAEL GREGER When you overload and you don't use enough detergent, you have redemption. That's where dirt from yo... CARL PATTON I can’t wait to find out how you taste, and you won’t want me to stop even after I’ve complete... JEANIENE FROST You need to avoid certain things in your train of thought: everything random, everything irrelevant.... MARCUS AURELIUS Falsehood is so easy, truth so difficult....Examine your words well, and you will find that even whe... GEORGE ELIOT Hard to think about chasing after someone when your own femur was sticking up out of your skin like ... JENNIFER ESTEP You can't spend your whole life teaching people about public service without finally thinking that y... MICHAEL IGNATIEFF
More Jerry Seinfield
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JERRY MORAN I'm going to keep thinking about topping myself every time. I can say very confidently that Alic... JERRY CANTRELL 'Home Alone' was a movie, not an alibi. JERRY ORBACH A metaphysical tour de force of untethered meaning and involuting interlocking contrapuntal rhythms,... JERRY SALTZ Not to say people shouldn't get rich from art. I adore the alchemy wherein artists who cast a co... JERRY SALTZ Success has a lot to do with luck, but it also involves a lot of real hard work. The thing about suc... JERRY CANTRELL Adrenaline is so strong that none of us understand it. JERRY LEWIS I am such a strong admirer and supporter of George W. Bush that if he suggested eliminating the inco... JERRY FALWELL It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fit... JERRY SEINFELD Australia was great. I would advise anybody to go there. In fact, if you couldn't live here, Aus... JERRY LAWLER They'd have to force me to take the All-Star Game. They take over the building, your season-tick... JERRY REINSDORF Stuff that's hidden and murky and ambiguous is scary because you don't know what it does. JERRY GARCIA Montana and I had a chemistry that was unbelievable. When I first came into the league he told me I ... JERRY RICE I don't think that McMahon thinks very much about the fact that J.R and I have been successful. ... JERRY LAWLER Anne is very forgiving. She doesn't care about money, being rich, or clothes. We never argued ab... JERRY STILLER To me it was never about what I accomplished on the football field, it was about the way I played th... JERRY RICE I don't like to be rushed. I plan my outfits for the week in advance. I find the appropriate out... JERRY HALL I like wearing my wedding ring, it's nice. JERRY O'CONNELL If I found the cure for dystrophy tomorrow, I would do a telethon in four weeks for acute pain that ... 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Plus, peo... JERRY GREENFIELD I went to Gettysburg College, where the famous Civil War battle was fought. I majored in English. I ... JERRY SPINELLI I enjoy life, and I think that's important. Life is so fragile and so fleeting, and it's ove... JERRY HALL I believe in financial retirement. I don't necessarily believe in physical retirement. JERRY DOYLE Businesses typically look at issues like price, quality, time of delivery. They don't often thin... JERRY GREENFIELD There's no better feeling than making your little girls laugh. JERRY O'CONNELL I have a loyalty that runs in my bloodstream, when I lock into someone or something, you can't g... JERRY LEWIS I think my fans would probably be surprised to know I'm not insane - I'm not a crazy person ... JERRY TRAINOR My guitar is a mutation between a classic Fender Stratocaster guitar, which I played for years, and ... JERRY GARCIA As we approached each other, the noise and the students around us melted away and we were utterly al... JERRY SPINELLI I mean, just because you're a musician doesn't mean all your ideas are about music. So every... JERRY GARCIA Chris Ofili's suave, stippled, visually tricked-out paintings of the nineties, with their allove... JERRY SALTZ I almost resent being Charley Moviestar. Yeah, I'm grateful. But it takes me away from my kids. JERRY LEWIS I don't plan out my visits rigorously, but I do have a list of about 125 New York galleries, alt... JERRY SALTZ In November, 1964 when I was a patient at the Mayo Clinic I though seriously about killing myself. JERRY KRAMER I have this old '57 Porsche Speedster, and the way the door closes, I'll just sit there and ... JERRY SEINFELD Artschwager's art always involves looking closely at surfaces, questions what an object is, want... JERRY SALTZ Damien Hirst is the Elvis of the English art world, its ayatollah, deliverer, and big-thinking entre... JERRY SALTZ It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world if we didn't have a salary cap. JERRY JONES Red-hot songs were born on the black streets of Baltimore, where I delivered five-gallon cans of ker... JERRY LEIBER I'm a fan of very, very expensive creams: Creme de la Mer, La Prairie Skin Caviar Luxe. I'm ... JERRY HALL My greatest moment as a jock occurred when I was 14 and playing punch ball in front of my house on A... JERRY REINSDORF The support this city and our fans have shown the Grizzlies made my decision to stay in Memphis an e... JERRY WEST Where Cezanne captured and intensified shards of the eternal (every pear far more sharply defined th... JERRY SALTZ From 1936 on, I have taken more falls than any other 20 comedians put together. From the time I was ... JERRY LEWIS You need lofty goals. Then cement it with a great work ethic. JERRY WEST All of us, whether or not we're celebrities, every one ought to spend part of their life making ... JERRY SPRINGER The idea of getting old is horrific, but I don't want to make it worse by becoming a grotesque c... JERRY HALL I think the cartoons that they're children are watching, particularly 'The Simpsons,' th... JERRY LEWIS It's just a show. It's not the end of Western Civilization. It's chewing gum. JERRY SPRINGER If Chief Justice Warren and his associates had known God's word and had desired to do the Lord... JERRY FALWELL I'm really looking forward to the Hall of Fame ceremonies. It's going to be unbelievable - j... JERRY RICE The new album is a childhood dream come true. Got to sing with Ronnie Spector, got to cover a bunch ... JERRY ONLY Crankiness is at the essence of all comedy. My wife and I were discussing the different types of cra... JERRY SEINFELD Being a good husband is like being a good stand-up comic - you need ten years before you can even ca... JERRY SEINFELD College was especially sweet because of the positive, hopeful atmosphere of a college campus. JERRY KRAMER Megacollectors suppose they can enter art history by spending astronomical amounts. JERRY SALTZ I always assumed the Department of Agriculture was the farmer and rancher's friend. JERRY MORAN So once I thought of the villain with a sense of humor, I began to think of a name and the name &quo... JERRY ROBINSON So, I'm thinking of a name for a villain that has a sense of humor. I thought of 'The Joker&... JERRY ROBINSON My job is not babysitting people; my job is focusing on making the best band I possibly can. JERRY ONLY The young man who's had the Guggenheim fortune behind him all his life - he can hire all the aut... JERRY LEWIS As I made my way through 'On Line,' the austere, stridently dogmatic, sometimes revelatory e... JERRY SALTZ You come to our stadium and look at the aura of 100,000 people. You look up there and see an Army ta... JERRY JONES