FastSaying

I never think I feel cynical in general. Cynical is reality with an alternate spelling. I feel there's a gigantic amount of injustice and overt crime every day in the world, from emotional crimes to international crimes, and it often carries rewards.


Woody Allen

  Email Quote to Friends   Link to Quote   Create Short URL  Publish Text About This Quote   Share on Facebook, Twitter, and more
  See Recommended Quotes For You

Related

Woody Allen has done some excellent serious movies, too, like Crimes And Misdemeanors. Very overlook...
DAVID ZUCKER I think Woody Allen is Woody Allen, and no matter where he goes he still makes his Woody Allen films...
ABBAS KIAROSTAMI I think the reason I was successful is that I was never cynical.
CAROL BURNETT I don't think my spirituality has affected my character. I feel like my character is much more cynic...
JASON RITTER I don't think my spirituality has affected my character. I feel like my character is much more c...
JASON RITTER The key is to commit crimes so confusing that police feel too stupid to even write a crime report ab...
RANDY K. MILHOLLAND The international community is pushing things forward in Bosnia... but it is doing it at expense of ...
ALIJA IZETBEGOVIC The conference will focus on preventing crime in rural areas. People think about crime in urban area...
BILL ROSE We now talk about every day. We trade information about new crimes and often get great leads from ea...
ED MATTINGLY I feel like every day of my life is a funny wardrobe malfunction!
NIKKI REED He is complicit in serious international crimes.
FRED TEEVEN This was one of the most brutal and heinous crimes committed in the county, ... I do, frankly, feel ...
STEPHEN HALL I feel I am defending the (U.S.) Constitution by not committing war crimes, destroying a country, an...
RYAN JOHNSON I attend dance class every alternate day, and it works like a cardio workout for me. I also do weigh...
TENA DESAE I feel less often compelled to do the work than I was in the past.
DANIEL DAY-LEWIS I read from Mark Twain's lips one or two of his good stories. He has his own way of thinking, saying...
HELEN KELLER I just feel very often like a child in an absolutely weird world. I think that life is quite weird s...
CECELIA AHERN I operate with an emotional fearlessness, and I really feel music; I really feel songs.
GEORGE STROUMBOULOPOULOS I'm disenchanted with Communism and most other things. I'm cynical but not a cynic. I'm ...
HOWARD FAST I think if you're a regular viewer of Fox News, you're among the most cynical people on plan...
BILL KELLER I never felt cynical, and I never felt that I couldn't do what I wanted to do.
CAROL BURNETT I'm a writer and director, and the movie I've seen a million times is 'Stardust Memories...
ROMAN COPPOLA It would be doing me great injustice to think that I have any feeling of indifference to my country;...
MARIE ANTOINETTE Generally I don't like doing remakes, but I think that's more in the cynical world of Hollywood wher...
GERARD BUTLER I think the International Criminal Court could be a threat to American security interests, because t...
JOHN BOLTON Has anybody ever told you you’re a remarkably cynical person?”
“I like to think of it as ...
BENEDICT JACKA I think that candidates who have pending cases of blood crimes and economic crimes must be definitel...
FRANCOIS BOZIZE You will notice that what we are aiming at when we fall in love is a very strange paradox. The parad...
WOODY ALLEN We're all faced throughout our lives with agonizing decisions, moral choices. Some are on a grand sc...
WOODY ALLEN Unfortunately, no tangible breakthrough was made with regard to crime in the army, where hazing acco...
ALEXANDER SAVENKOV As long as I'm learning every day of my life, I will never feel old. Never. And I don't feel...
PAT MITCHELL Crimes, like virtues, are their own rewards
GEORGE FARQUHAR A lot of people have asked me whether I am a cynic or take a cynical view of politics and are often ...
BEAU WILLIMON Unfortunately, no tangible breakthrough was made with regard to crime in the army, where hazing acco...
ALEXANDER SAVENKOV Crimes, like virtues, are their own rewards.
GEORGE FARQUHAR Getting even was the basis of many primate semantic confusions, such as"expropriating the expropriat...
ROBERT ANTON WILSON From what I know about the case and my discussion of it with my client, I believe he is innocent of ...
EARL GRAY I would love to have a long and serious conversation with the Pope. And Woody Allen, whom I have nev...
CHARLIE ROSE We've committed many war crimes in Vietnam - but I'll tell you something interesting about t...
GEORGE WALD In a cruel and evil world, being cynical can allow you to get some entertainment out of it
DANIEL WATERS So I think it is wise to be extremely cynical about what you are being told, even from your own gove...
ALAN RUSBRIDGER Amongst my friends, I am known as the most cynical person they know - I'm incredibly cynical. I ...
NIGEL COLE I like to open for a band as it brings on sort of a challenge and it makes things more interesting. ...
KELLY JONES I may have grown cynical from long service, but this is a tendency I do not like, and I sometimes th...
JOHN SHARP WILLIAMS I'm exchanging molecules every 30 days with the natural world and in a spiritual sense I know I ...
GALEN ROWELL My illness is now in remission, and on a day-to-day basis, I truly feel amazing. I wake up with such...
ELLA WOODWARD With the passing of this draft law, international cooperation in battling corruption and other trans...
HAMID AWALUDDIN Very few men imprisoned for economic crimes or even crimes of passion against the oppressor feel tha...
GEORGE JACKSON For the first time I feel an inner emotional security. There is reality and dependability. My life r...
NATALIE WOOD That assumes that trace data is meaningful in indicating that [firearms] dealers are involved in sel...
RICHARD GARDINER Not being in tune with your customers is like living in an alternate reality; the way you think your...
BO BENNETT Look here, I often feel the same in more than one respect--not just in financial things, but in art ...
VINCENT VAN GOGH I was beginning to feel that there would never be another American uprising, that the energy was gon...
HAKIM BEY There are no crimes and no criminals in these days. What is the use of having brains in our professi...
ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE Americans are suffering so much from being in unrewarding environments that it has made us very cyni...
JAMES HOWARD KUNSTLER I feel like it's injustice if he doesn't get prosecuted fully for the crime of murder of James.
HARRY DUFF Woody Allen is really the ultimate. I love that he believed in himself enough to do what he did. And...
MINDY KALING Every day I feel is a blessing from God. And I consider it a new beginning. Yeah, everything is beau...
PRINCE It's the relationship I have with the world: always trying to escape from reality. I'm a day...
AMIN MAALOUF I have kept a diary,
WITHNAIL AND I There is a lot of crossover crime in this area, where you have people who live in Wayne that commit ...
LAWRENCE MEYER I'm a very jaded and cynical person.
ED HELMS Lots of Afghans are disappointed and cynical because they feel like people who perpetrated serious h...
SAM ZARIFI I feel like it's a natural transition from planning and zoning to the city council and to represent ...
GARY CAPLINGER Music — good music, great music — had a hard, irreducible purity to it. It might be bitter and d...
JULIAN BARNES I was assigned to do a job by the attorney general, and that was to find out whether crimes were com...
KEN STARR I work out for an hour and a half every day, alternating between cardio and weights. I also do yoga ...
TENA DESAE I think theres a little child in all of us and we all to often forget to let the child out to play.
DONNA A. FAVORS I feel like I've moved up, ... I really feel like the coaches and scouts and general managers, I thi...
LEONARD DAVIS Everyone in LA is cynical and spoiled and seen it all.
SALLY MORRISON All novels are about crime. You'd be hard pressed to find any novel that does not have an elemen...
CARL HIAASEN There is no right or wrong in our view of the world. But, if my view causes me emotional pain, then ...
CHRISTOPHER SHEA We won't tolerate abuses and crimes made every day in the name of freedom of speech. That is fre...
RAFAEL CORREA It was kind of scary because working with Woody Allen becomes sort of a big deal in your mind. He di...
RADHA MITCHELL I never thought I'd spend all my life with Gary. I suppose I was quite cynical about marriage. B...
SADIE FROST I felt wise and cynical as all hell.
SYLVIA PLATH Students undergo a conversion in the third year of medical school - not pre-clinical to clinical, bu...
ABRAHAM VERGHESE I realized that day that blessings come in a variety of shapes, colors, and sizes.
CRAIG GROESCHEL Turning 50 is a little bit of a 'taking stock' moment. I feel probably a little dumber. I do...
FLEA I definitely have a little Woody Allen inside of me. That is true.
AUTRE NE VEUT High intelligence, international collaboration and migration in groups are the three major traits of...
CUI ZHIKUN I feel 'proud' whenever I feel that I've worked on something for a certain amount of tim...
TAO LIN Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
GEORGE CARLIN Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist
GEORGE CARLIN I feel like I'm constantly falling behind. I feel like every day I'm out of the office I'...
MARC ANDREESEN Marry an orphan: you'll never have to spend boring holidays with the in-laws (at most an occasional ...
GEORGE CARLIN The scar (of the crime) is still there. Taylor's trial before the UN court will guarantee justice an...
DAVID ANYAELE I think, for an actor, the whole world is a place of work because if you focus on characters and on ...
EDGAR RAMIREZ I believe in peace and love, but i'm also very cynical. Cynical as the white stuff on the corner of ...
EFRAT CYBULKIEWICZ I still deal with triggers and neuroses that I've developed over the decades. But I do think I h...
JOHN GRANT I hate Woody Allen physically, I dislike that kind of man.
ORSON WELLES I do not think that it is right for me to start giving opinions about the human rights situation of ...
FATOU BENSOUDA I wanted to work with Mike Leigh. I had my list of British people I wanted to work with, and I wante...
CARMEN EJOGO It was an emotional night, an extraordinary moment, ... I wish Dad was there to touch and feel the s...
CAL RIPKEN I feel like I go through an awkward phase almost every day.
CAMERON DALLAS You are a cynical man, Mr. Pleasant."
"We live in cynical times, Miss Cain.
DEREK LANDY Men feel that cruelty to the poor is a kind of cruelty to animals. They never feel that it is an inj...
GILBERT K. CHESTERTON Men feel that cruelty to the poor is a kind of cruelty to animals. They never feel that it is an inj...
G. K. CHESTERTON I worry that no matter how cynical you become, it's never enough to keep up.
JANE WAGNER Liars are the cause of all the sins and crimes in the world.
EPICTETUS

More Woody Allen

If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
WOODY ALLEN Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is like a plate of meat and pot...
WOODY ALLEN I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
WOODY ALLEN I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker.
WOODY ALLEN If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very in...
WOODY ALLEN What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my car...
WOODY ALLEN What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?
WOODY ALLEN There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman...
WOODY ALLEN God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.
WOODY ALLEN I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. . . I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.
WOODY ALLEN The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to m...
WOODY ALLEN There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and w...
WOODY ALLEN Sex is nature's way of saying 'Hi!'
WOODY ALLEN Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting any
WOODY ALLEN sex is simple, love stings afterwards.
WOODY ALLEN If it wasn't for dogs, some people would never go for a walk.
WOODY ALLEN I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got 100.
WOODY ALLEN Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
WOODY ALLEN Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.
WOODY ALLEN I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
WOODY ALLEN Due to current economic conditions the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
WOODY ALLEN What animal can jump higher than a house? Any animal that can jump at all, because houses can't jum...
WOODY ALLEN You know the speed of light; so what is the speed of dark?
WOODY ALLEN You're born free, then you're taxed to death.
WOODY ALLEN It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.
WOODY ALLEN The decision to decide is a decision in itself.
WOODY ALLEN One small decision can change your life! That's why I always let someone else make my decisions, tha...
WOODY ALLEN Growing up is amazing, until you get old!
WOODY ALLEN All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white...
WOODY ALLEN If I don't log into Facebook two days in a row, call the police, someone must've kidnapped me!
WOODY ALLEN I'm not anti-social. I'm just not social.
WOODY ALLEN Is sex dirty? Only when it's being done right.
WOODY ALLEN The difference between sex and love is that sex relieves tension and love causes it.
WOODY ALLEN I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.
WOODY ALLEN I love nature, I just don't want to get any of it on me.
WOODY ALLEN In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Th...
WOODY ALLEN Life is divided up into the horrible and the miserable.
WOODY ALLEN A Bay Area Bisexual told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
WOODY ALLEN Today I saw a red and yellow sunset and thought, how insignificant I am! Of course, I thought that y...
WOODY ALLEN Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought -...
WOODY ALLEN If you don't fail now and again, it's a sign you're playing it safe.
WOODY ALLEN In perpetrating a revolution, there are two requirements: someone or something to revolt against and...
WOODY ALLEN My one regret in life is that I'm not someone else.
WOODY ALLEN Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
WOODY ALLEN It shows exactly what you can do if you're a total psychotic.
WOODY ALLEN I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year for cheating on my metaphysics final. You know, I looked...
WOODY ALLEN For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermu...
WOODY ALLEN Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she would come in and sink my boats.
WOODY ALLEN The lion and the calf will lay down together, but the calf won't get much sleep..
WOODY ALLEN Marriage is the death of hope.
WOODY ALLEN Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more fun.
WOODY ALLEN I don't respond well to mellow, you know what I mean, I have a tendency to... if I get too mellow, I...
WOODY ALLEN I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
WOODY ALLEN I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN I am at two with nature.
WOODY ALLEN Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
WOODY ALLEN If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.
WOODY ALLEN I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily as lying down.
WOODY ALLEN I don't believe in an after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
WOODY ALLEN It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better... while the ba...
WOODY ALLEN I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead -- not sick, not wounded -- dead.
WOODY ALLEN In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.
WOODY ALLEN If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.
WOODY ALLEN Capital punishment would be more effective as a preventive measure if it were administered prior to ...
WOODY ALLEN More than at any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and ut...
WOODY ALLEN A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies. An...
WOODY ALLEN Eighty percent of success is showing up.
WOODY ALLEN What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy...
WOODY ALLEN I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.
WOODY ALLEN Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.
WOODY ALLEN Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable; with the possible exc...
WOODY ALLEN A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said 'no'.
WOODY ALLEN It is no secret that organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year. This is ...
WOODY ALLEN I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
WOODY ALLEN I've often said, the only thing standing between me and greatness is me
WOODY ALLEN To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one suffers from not loving. ...
WOODY ALLEN Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
WOODY ALLEN Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex an...
WOODY ALLEN What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.
WOODY ALLEN How to make God laugh: Tell him your future plans.
WOODY ALLEN Innovation is the ability to see change as an opportunity - not a threat
WOODY ALLEN Just don't take any class where you have to read BEOWULF.
WOODY ALLEN Eternity is really long, especially near the end
WOODY ALLEN I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy ...
WOODY ALLEN I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government.
WOODY ALLEN Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.
WOODY ALLEN If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take tw...
WOODY ALLEN Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer sex raises some pretty good questions
WOODY ALLEN A woman's appetite is twice that of a man's; her sexual desire, four times; her intelligence, eight ...
WOODY ALLEN The study of economy usually shows us that the best time for purchase was last year.
WOODY ALLEN The best way to find your perfect match is to meet love halfway.
WOODY ALLEN There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep better, but the bad seem t...
WOODY ALLEN Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on offi...
WOODY ALLEN To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
WOODY ALLEN Men learn to love the woman they are attracted to. Women learn to become attracted to the man they f...
WOODY ALLEN Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
WOODY ALLEN Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
WOODY ALLEN I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
WOODY ALLEN It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad o...
WOODY ALLEN Tradition is the illusion of permanance.
WOODY ALLEN Some guy hit my fender the other day, and I said unto him, 'Be fruitful, and multiply'. But not in t...
WOODY ALLEN Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.
WOODY ALLEN To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
WOODY ALLEN I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to fin...
WOODY ALLEN I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.
WOODY ALLEN He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian.
WOODY ALLEN Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty da...
WOODY ALLEN Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boa...
WOODY ALLEN As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure ou...
WOODY ALLEN In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.
WOODY ALLEN The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don't h...
WOODY ALLEN I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
WOODY ALLEN I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.
WOODY ALLEN I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.
WOODY ALLEN Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.
WOODY ALLEN My films are therapy for my debilitating depression. In institutions people weave baskets. I make fi...
WOODY ALLEN I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the bo...
WOODY ALLEN It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.
WOODY ALLEN I was thrown out of NYU for cheating-with the deans wife
WOODY ALLEN If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job
WOODY ALLEN It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
WOODY ALLEN I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
WOODY ALLEN Whosoever shall not fall by the sword or by famine, shall fall by pestilence, so why bother shaving?
WOODY ALLEN Whosover loveth wisdom is righteous, but he that keepeth company with fowl is weird.
WOODY ALLEN The wicked at heart probably know something.
WOODY ALLEN My Lord, my Lord! What hast Thou done, lately?
WOODY ALLEN Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right.
WOODY ALLEN If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job.
WOODY ALLEN Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.
WOODY ALLEN I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy ...
WOODY ALLEN I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead- not sick, not wounded - dead.
WOODY ALLEN For the first year of marriage I had basically a bad attitude. I tended to place my wife underneath ...
WOODY ALLEN We were married by a reformed rabbi in Long Island. A very reformed rabbi. A Nazi.
WOODY ALLEN The only difference between sex and death is, with death you can do it alone and nobody's going to m...
WOODY ALLEN Seventy percent of success in life is showing up.
WOODY ALLEN My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.
WOODY ALLEN It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat...
WOODY ALLEN It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
WOODY ALLEN Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought--...
WOODY ALLEN If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank.
WOODY ALLEN If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say ab...
WOODY ALLEN I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way aroun...
WOODY ALLEN I took a speed reading course and read 'War and Peace' in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
WOODY ALLEN I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.
WOODY ALLEN I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.
WOODY ALLEN I can't listen to that much Wagner. I start getting the urge to conquer Poland.
WOODY ALLEN How is it possible to find meaning in a finite world, given my waist and shirt size?
WOODY ALLEN How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typ...
WOODY ALLEN His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.
WOODY ALLEN Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
WOODY ALLEN As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree' -- probably because it's so hard to figure out how to g...
WOODY ALLEN Death doesn't really worry me that much, I'm not frightened about it... I just don't want to be ther...
WOODY ALLEN More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter...
WOODY ALLEN You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundre...
WOODY ALLEN Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?
WOODY ALLEN When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
WOODY ALLEN Thought: Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverag...
WOODY ALLEN The government is unresponsive to the needs of the little man. Under 5'7", it is impossible to get y...
WOODY ALLEN Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.
WOODY ALLEN On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily lying down.
WOODY ALLEN Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.
WOODY ALLEN My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.
WOODY ALLEN Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.
WOODY ALLEN Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
WOODY ALLEN A ''Bay Area Bisexual'' told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.
WOODY ALLEN Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have declare...
WOODY ALLEN The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue of Liberty.
WOODY ALLEN Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not in those words.
WOODY ALLEN I work for a company that makes deceptively shallow serving dishes for Chinese restaurants
WOODY ALLEN I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!
WOODY ALLEN Everytime I hear Wagner I feel like invading Poland.
WOODY ALLEN She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set of parabolas that could ca...
WOODY ALLEN My brain? That´s my second favourite organ.
WOODY ALLEN I think any boycott is wrong, ... Boycotts were exactly what the Germans were doing against the Jews...
WOODY ALLEN Psychoanalyses is like music lessons, for 5 years you do not notice any progress and suddenly you ca...
WOODY ALLEN Having sex is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
WOODY ALLEN As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to ge...
WOODY ALLEN Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not in those words.
WOODY ALLEN There's an old joke - um... two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort, and one of 'em says...
WOODY ALLEN I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horr...
WOODY ALLEN If Jesus came back and saw what was being done in his name, he'd never stop throwing up.
WOODY ALLEN I like the rain. It washes memories off the sidewalk of life.
WOODY ALLEN It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones
slept better, [Cloquet...
WOODY ALLEN Subjectivity is objective.
WOODY ALLEN The most expensive sex is free sex
WOODY ALLEN These modern analysts! They charge so much. In my day, for five marks Freud himself would treat you....
WOODY ALLEN It is impossible to travel faster than light, and certainly not desirable, as one’s hat keeps blow...
WOODY ALLEN We laughed over it, and Hemingway punched me in the mouth.
WOODY ALLEN I think crime pays. The hours are good, you travel a lot
WOODY ALLEN Arlene and I have to get a divorce. She thinks I'm a pervert because I drank our water bed.
WOODY ALLEN You will notice that what we are aiming at when we fall in love is a very strange paradox. The parad...
WOODY ALLEN This guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, Doc, my brother’s crazy. He thinks he’s a chicken. The...
WOODY ALLEN The heart wants what it wants.
WOODY ALLEN We're all faced throughout our lives with agonizing decisions, moral choices. Some are on a grand sc...
WOODY ALLEN Chapter 1.
He adored New York City. He idolized it all out of proportion...no, make t...
WOODY ALLEN