I make no secret of the fact that I would rather lie on a sofa than sweep beneath it.

Cleanliness is not next to godliness. It isn't even in the same neighborhood. No one has ever gotten a religious experience out of removing burned-on cheese from the grill of the toaster oven.

Housework can kill you if done right.

I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

Conran's rule of housework: it expands to fill the time available plus half an hour

Life is too short to stuff a mushroom.