I know im awesome because if i was superman the first thing i would do is build a suit made out of lead. Problem kryptonite?

Im like Captain America.... accept with a better body, smarter and 2 deployments...

Having abs of steel is both my gift and a curse... TSA shows no mercy at those metal detectors..

"People ask me what I’m going to do when i get out of the Army, I always tell them, "I’m not sure but I could always go and be an Abercrombie model".

When I become president, I will pas a law in which a person may only use one exclamation mark per month.. imagine how serious fights would get when someone sends you one

if intelligence and looks were on the same scale women would never get above a 5.