I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.

In order to have sacred thoughts, give up the vices like consumption of non-vegetarian food, smoking and drinking intoxicants.

Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.

To this day I can't get aroused until I see a pair of rubber dice hanging from the mirror

I'm gaining weight the right way: I'm drinking beer.

There is no smoking, eating or drinking. But we do have restrooms.