I have never seen two people on pot get in a fight because it is fucking IMPOSSIBLE. "Hey, buddy!" "Hey, what?" "Ummmmmmm...." End of argument.

A lot of Christians wear crosses around their necks. You think when Jesus comes back he ever wants to see a fucking cross? It's like going up to Jackie Onassis wearing a rifle pendant.

I smoke. If this bothers anyone, I suggest you look around at the world in which we live and shut your fuckin' mouth.

The worst kind of non-smokers are the ones that come up to you and cough. That's pretty fucking cruel isn't it? Do you go up to cripples and dance too?

It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's just hilarious.

Childbirth is no more a miracle then eating food and a turd coming out of your ass.