I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty

Drinking beer doesn't make you fat, It makes you lean....Against bars, tables, chairs, and poles.

The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

Life's but a day at most.

Retire? I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.