Children make your life important.

One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child's name and how old he or she is.

It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows

If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it.

A child develops individuality long before he develops taste. I have seen my kid straggle into the kitchen in the morning with outfits that need only one accessory -- an empty bottle of gin.

All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.