All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me - so let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer

All right, let's not panic. I'll make the money by selling one of my livers. I can get by with one.

I won't sleep in the same bed with a woman who thinks I'm lazy! I'm going right downstairs, unfold the couch, unroll the sleeping ba- uh, goodnight.

It's hard to find a play that's right for me to do. Rather than waiting around for the right script to come along, I decided to write one myself.

No! No no no no no no! Well, yes.

Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the bible.