A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit!

You can't be friends with a squirrel! A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit.

Imagine that being your job, huh, baby rat merchant?

I don't judge others. I say if you feel good with what you're doing, let your freak flag fly.

I tell my friends married life is boring, but that's just a fun thing to say to make single people feel better.

When men attempt bold gestures, generally it's considered romantic. When women do it, it's often considered desperate or psycho.