A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well.

My son complains about headaches. I tell him all the time, when you get out of bed, it's feet first!

I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.

I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me.

A woman says to a man, "I haven't seen you around here." "Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife." "So you're single…."

A woman says to a man, "I haven't seen you around here." "Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife." "So you're single…."