A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

When your wife asks you for your opinion, she doesn't really want your opinion. She wants her opinion - just in a deeper voice.

For years [my wedding ring] has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that it's time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward.

I know you've been married to the same woman for 69 years. That is marvelous. It must be very inexpensive.

The sum which two married people owe to one another defies calculation. It is an infinite debt, which can only be discharged through all eternity.

Marriage is the perfection of what love aimed at, ignorant of what it sought