A fan once asked if he could have a piece of my hair for voodoo. I said no, so he hugged me and plucked out a couple of hairs and ran off.

Someone once asked me, 'How long does it take to do your hair.' I said, 'I don't know, I'm never there.'

She hath more hair than wit, and more faults than hairs, and more wealth than faults.

My brother asked me once, 'Are you a misanthrope?' And I said, 'No, I just find people irritating.'

Carrot Top... I gave him advice once and he ran with it. He should thank me.

A whole bunch of months passed and I didn't hear anything and then he emailed and asked if I could do a little piece on POD and Queens of the Stone Age.