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You should never pick up a newspaper when you're feeling good, because every newspaper has a special department, called the "Bummer Desk", which is responsible for digging up depressing front-page stories with headlines like "DOORBELL USE LINKED TO LEUKEMIA" and "OZONE LAYER COMPLETELY GONE DIRECTLY OVER YOUR HOUSE.


Steve Barry

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I'm waiting for it to get out of the main front page of the newspaper.
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ANDRE MAUROIS The investigation is looking at how a sealed court document ended up with the newspaper.
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JAMES WAGHORNE This is a huge story. I wonder if it will be one of the last stories. How can a newspaper survive if...
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RALPH SCARPINO Every newspaper in the country covers stories that other newspapers cover. Every industry is filled ...
EZRA KLEIN The second analog-era mechanism that encourages serendipity involves the physical limitations of the...
STEVEN JOHNSON I had a newspaper in Flint, Michigan called the 'Flint Voice,' and so it was a, you know, un...
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SHUNRYU SUZUKI When you do something, you should burn yourself up completely, like a good bonfire, leaving no trace...
SHUNRYU SUZUKA When you do something, you should burn yourself up completely, like a good bonfire, leaving no trace...
SHUNRYU SUZUKI Growing up I was taught not to burn any bridges, because you never know when you have to go back ove...
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CARRIE KNOX The newspaper employees and their families were hurriedly rushed to the backs of newspaper trucks, w...
JULIE BUCHANAN The book is your book. You have been responsible for every single thing on every page, every comma, ...
PAUL AUSTER Even in half demon hunter clothes, Clary thought, he looked like the kind of boy who'd come over you...
CASSANDRA CLARE Yeah, in a lot of the products we use, like cement has jumped over a dollar or two dollars a bag, wh...
CARL CORY It's a gamble to go up against a major media company, but the governor obviously feels he has no cho...
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E. L. DOCTOROW We will still finish most production of the newspaper at night, as we have been doing. But in the ev...
ANTHONY CONCHEL When I was 15, I came downstairs one morning, picked up mother's newspaper and, oh, what a shock...
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JOHN CONNOLLY Steve has been involved with racing for years. Steve and Kyle met a couple months ago and seemed to ...
CARL DRUM One-newspaper towns are not good because all the surviving newspaper does is print money. They make ...
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GEORGE MURPHY This newspaper is completely and totally objective and unbiased. I don't want to dignify their insul...
MICHAEL HOFFMAN Public opinion is a compound of folly, weakness, prejudice, wrong feeling, right feeling, obstinacy,...
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DR ANIL KUMAR SINHA Keep a copy of 'Islands in the Stream' by Ernest Hemingway on the left hand side of your des...
LYNN COADY [Charlene Gentile keeps the front of the house under control, and is also responsible for the fine w...
KEVIN KELLY He's a big-time point guard. You don't have enough text in your newspaper to describe how good he is...
DIETER HORTON Students are allowed to use their phones before school and after school but not during school. The p...
MAURICE RISNER I wake up most days with a vague feeling of doom - 'Dear God. Here I am again.' Then, when I...
BRUCE ROBINSON When you live with a woman you learn something every day. So far I have learned that long hair will ...
AUDREY NIFFENEGGER The plan of the newspaper is good and wise; when you can't get a compliment any other way, pay yours...
MARK TWAIN The last copy of the Chicago Daily News I picked up had three crime stories on its front page. But b...
JOHN GUNTHER I think back to some of the things Harry said and some of the things I said trying to be funny. If I...
JACK BUCK The newspaper will cost you a dollar and 75 cents of that dollar goes directly to the purchase of th...
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DOUG MELVIN The answer scrawled on a blank page in a daily newspaper, was conceived whilst aboard a ferry.
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ROSEANNE BARR I should be able to pick which applications I use for managing my life, I should be able to pick whi...
TIM BERNERS-LEE There is no greater feeling of love than the love you feel when someone you know whom is special thr...
FRANCESCO NICHOLAS CECE To go out there with your best friends and have your guys beat up on their guys is a special time. I...
COLIN MAILLOUX The seemingly omnipresent storm clouds hanging over the Constitution often make it hard to find a si...
BOB BARR I always idolized guys like Deion Sanders, Barry Sanders, Steve Young and the entire 49ers team, rea...
REGGIE BUSH When (Life Flight) picks up a patient, they have nothing to do with money. When they're called, they...
JANET FRANK [Barry Bonds, his name continually linked to suspicion of steroid use, later broached the subject.] ...
BARRY BONDS How wonderful it is to be able to write someone a letter! To feel like conveying your thoughts to a ...
HARUKI MURAKAMI We grow up in a world where satisfying our cravings seems to be the number one objective, every adve...
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CRAIG WILSON Being a good Muslim. Hussain should know the worldwide reaction over caricatures of the Prophet Moha...
VINAY KATIYAR The thing about a hero, is even when it doesn't look like there's a light at the end of the tunnel, ...
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DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) I shared the stage with Jerry for 35 years and think about him every time I pick up my guitar. This ...
BOB WEIR You should never be so involved with your position/job that when the position is gone your entire se...
COLIN POWELL It should never be your job to pick up the pieces of a broken man or to housebreak one. There are fa...
ALICE WALSH I think a newspaper should be provocative, stir 'em up, but you can't do that on television....
RUPERT MURDOCH A good newspaper, I suppose, is a nation talking to itself.
ARTHUR MILLER

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BARRY SANDERS My desire to exit the game is greater than my desire to remain in it. I have searched my heart throu...
BARRY SANDERS I really love peace and quiet.
BARRY SANDERS You know, I'm fairly intelligent, but I don't think my grades reflected that.
BARRY SANDERS It was a wonderful experience to play in the NFL, and I have no regrets. I truly will miss playing f...
BARRY SANDERS Nothing ever turns out the way people expect it to.
BARRY SANDERS Many hedge fund managers have become billionaires; perhaps this - plus their reputations as the smar...
BARRY RITHOLTZ The simple reality of life is that everyone is wrong on a regular basis. By confronting these inevit...
BARRY RITHOLTZ History is replete with examples of tech firms that were marginalized by new companies and technolog...
BARRY RITHOLTZ A well-designed 401(k) plan is an enormous competitive edge when recruiting and retaining employees.
BARRY RITHOLTZ Hedge fund managers charge so much more than mutual fund managers; alpha is even harder to come by. ...
BARRY RITHOLTZ Rather than engage in the sort of selective retention that so many investors tend to do and pretend ...
BARRY RITHOLTZ You can blow on the dice all you want, but whether they come up 'seven' is still a function ...
BARRY RITHOLTZ Investing is about making probabilistic decisions with limited information about an unknowable futur...
BARRY RITHOLTZ Based on a lifetime of observations and a few decades in the markets, I understand that societies, b...
BARRY RITHOLTZ Never forget this simple truism: Forecasting is marketing, plain and simple.
BARRY RITHOLTZ We love a tale of heroes and villains and conflicts requiring a neat resolution.
BARRY RITHOLTZ When it comes to investing, you are your own worst enemy.
BARRY RITHOLTZ People who work in specialized fields seem to have their own language. Practitioners develop a short...
BARRY RITHOLTZ The good news is that economists are intelligent, engaging and often charming folks. The bad news is...
BARRY RITHOLTZ The data strongly suggest that very good years in the U.S. stock market are followed by more good ye...
BARRY RITHOLTZ When it comes to investing, there is no such thing as a one-size-fits-all portfolio.
BARRY RITHOLTZ Owning a variety of asset classes means that some part of your portfolio will be doing well when the...
BARRY RITHOLTZ Hedge funds are not especially liquid. Many are 'gated' - meaning there are only small windo...
BARRY RITHOLTZ The beauty of diversification is it's about as close as you can get to a free lunch in investing...
BARRY RITHOLTZ