When you have a movie about people landing from planet Neptune, you suspend disbelief. I totally get it. But I like doing things that happen in real life.


Will Gluck

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I did not have one butterfly out there today,'' he said.
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Married to the Mob.
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Hello you're with Drudge.
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A politician's words reveal less about what he thinks about his subject than what he thinks about hi...
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Joy comes from using your potential.
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Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
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To appreciate heaven well, it's good for a person to have some fifteen minutes of hell.
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Do anything in this world but monkey with somebody eles's religion. What reasoning of conceit makes ...
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Fanatical religion driven to a certain point is almost as bad as none at all, but not quite.
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It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts.
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Strangers are just friends I haven't met yet.
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Having no applicable skills, in any possible area whatsoever, effectively makes me the master of red...
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I flow like a butter in the nailed pan I stole. I also kept the nail, to polish and use as a means o...
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In the early days of the Indian Territory, there were no such things as birth certificates. You bein...
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The person with the best job in the country is the vice president. All he has to do is get up every ...
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I used to do prank calls as these people and try to convince certain hoteliers that I was someone el...
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All I know is what I read in the papers.
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America is a great country, but you can't live in it for nothing.
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We are given children to test us and make us more spiritual.
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It is no longer enough to be lusty. One must be a sexual gourmet.
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Live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
WILL ROGERS
About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with a prayer and closes with an i...
WILL ROGERS
America is becoming so educated that ignorance will be a novelty. I will belong to the select few.
WILL ROGERS
Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House an...
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There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you
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There is no argument in the world that carries the hatred that a relioious belief does. The more lea...
WILL ROGERS
Most of us spend too much time on the last twenty-four hours and too little on the last six thousand...
WILL DURANT
A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people
WILL ROGERS
There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.
WILL ROGERS
There is nothing so stupid as an educated man, if you get off the thing that he was educated in.
WILL ROGERS
Education is the transmission of civilization.
WILL DURANT
There is nothing as stupid as an educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.
WILL ROGERS
Education is a progressive discovery of our ignorance.
WILL DURANT
Regard yourself as a small corporation of one. Take yourself off on team-building exercises (long wa...
WILL SELF
Quinns always come at half price, about half the time, and half-naked, even during the colder half o...
WILL ADVISE
If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
WILL ROGERS
Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the th...
WILL SMITH
There is nothing so stupid as an educated man, if you get him off the thing he was educated in.
WILL ROGERS
I like to hear a man talk about himself because then I never hear anything, but good.
WILL ROGERS
Get someone else to blow your horn and the sound will carry twice as far.
WILL ROGERS
Too many people are buying things they can't afford, with money that they don't have... to impress p...
WILL SMITH
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
WILL ROGERS
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
WILL ROGERS
One must be a lotus to emerge from mucky waters clean.
WILL ADVISE
Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.
WILL ROGERS
Don't chase people. Be yourself, do your own thing and work hard. The right people - the ones who re...
WILL SMITH
America is all about speed. Hot, nasty, badass speed.
WILL FERRELL
The greatest gift you can give anyone is your undivided attention...
WILL SCHWALBE
I will never joke about old soldiers who try to get to reunions to talk over the war again. To talk ...
WILL ROGERS
It is said that God gave us memory so we could have roses in winter. But it is also true that withou...
GEORGE WILL
The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.
WILL ROGERS
You never know how much a man can't remember until he is called as a witness.
WILL ROGERS
Moral codes adjust themselves to environmental conditions.
WILL DURANT
Aristotle is famous for knowing everything. He taught that the brain exists merely to cool the blood...
WILL CUPPY
The trouble with most people is that they think with their hopes or fears or wishes, rather than the...
WILL DURANT