When choosing between two evils, I always like to take the one I've never tried before

Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.

His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork

Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present.

Love thy neighbor -- and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.