What's your best non-swearing insult? I hope you step on a Lego.


Anonymous

  Email Quote to Friends   Link to Quote   Create Short URL  Publish Text About This Quote   Share on Facebook, Twitter, and more
  See Recommended Quotes For You

Related

Best friends don't ask you: "Is something wrong?"Best friends ask you: "Whats wrong?".
UNKNOWN
Hope greets your desires warmly while doubts insult your efforts bitterly!
ISRAELMORE AYIVOR
...
You can colour your eyes…
You can put on your skin tattoo…
...

- ...
DEYTH BANGER
... And hope says: "Come on, it's alright, just keep going." Hope encourages the strides to your goa...
RUBEN PAPIAN
Step follows step,
Hope follows Courage,
Set your face towards danger,
Set your heart...
GAIL CARSON LEVINE
Beyond a deck of cards the following philosophy is true: life is about playing a game the best you c...
DANIEL ROBERT O'NEILL
If you have a roof over your head, clothes on you back, and food in your mouth. Please don't tell me...
HARLAN JEFFERSON
I asked Faith to Walk with ME,, Hope to Show ME whats Mines,, and Love to Show ME How...
KALUM JOHNSON (KDOG)
Facebook keeps asking whats on my mind, i just keep posting : you wouldnt wanna know dat
OLASOT
The team behind 'The Lego Movie' approached me. They wanted to do something extra special fo...
NATHAN SAWAYA
Tears aren't a sign of weakness, you cry when your happy and you cry when your sad. Whats realy weak...
MONICA KEILANI M-P
When it was reported to General Washington that the army was frequently indulging in swearing, he im...
GEORGE WASHINGTON
My best advice is this - by the time you meet your Maker, and may it be a long, long time from now, ...
ROBYN CARR
I won't insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said.
WILLIAM F. BUCKLEY JR.
I won't insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said.
WILLIAM F. BUCKLEY, JR.
It is an insult to the person who has always opposed these non-vegetarian things.
RAGHU SHARMA
Swearing doesn’t make your argument valid; it just tells the other person you have lost your class...
SHANNON L. ALDER
Keep hoping until hope dies; remember, however, that hope never dies! Just take good steps with fait...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
Golf is a really weird game. You can have your best round ever and your worst round ever on back-to-...
KATE GOLDEN
If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.
JEFF FOXWORTHY
I won't insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said.
WILLIAM F. BUCKLEY, JR.
Never insult a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes, that way when you insult him, your a mil...
CHRIS HOWARD
Unlike others who have been caught swearing on camera, I apologised immediately. And yet I am the on...
WAYNE ROONEY
Whats the point of changing everything about your lover? you dont love them entirely for who they ar...
AMIR RIVEROLL
A practice of giving [it] your best, means you don't just have to hope for it.
T.F. HODGE
Maybe there are no right moments, right guys, right answers...maybe you just have to say whats in yo...
SARAH JESSICA PARKER
I find anonymous music frees me best. Chinese pop can be perfect. I can't decipher anything on t...
ROMESH GUNESEKERA
You know how only you can insult your own family? That's how I feel about Florida.
DANIELLE SCHNEIDER
I feel that the most important step in any major accomplishment is setting a specific goal. This ena...
KURT THOMAS
I feel that the most important step in any major accomplishment is setting a specific goal. This e...
KURT THOMAS
An insult bestowed on your interior and exterior personality; for causes beyond control, kills you i...
ANIRUDDHA SASTIKAR
I am an artist who works with Lego.
NATHAN SAWAYA
Do you ever get that feeling where you don't want to talk to anyone anymore? You just want to be lef...
MAHMOUD EL HALLAB
Whats your dream nurture it give birth the world will be a better place because of it live full, liv...
JOHN CLEMENT OGHINAN
things get eazyer the older you get sometimes you need to take a step back and look at how much of a...
IJIRASHIIJACK
Make your life like a work of art,visualize your talent,express your lifestyle and succeed whats wor...
MARK GRINER
You know the greatest thing about working on 'Fallon?' I get so many anonymous gifts.
QUESTLOVE
I don't see how a reporter can function in a sensitive beat without relying on anonymous sources -- ...
BOB ZELNICK
When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands
GEORGE CARLIN
One step at a time. Focusing on the next step is the best way to avoid overwhelm.
DAN O'DONNELL
its not whats in the outside that Matters its whats in the inside that Counts.
NADIRA AHMED
But once in a while, you pick the right thing, the exact best thing. Every day, the moment you open ...
SARAH OCKLER
I feel to invite women everywhere to rise to the great potential within you. I do not ask that you r...
GORDON B. HINCKLEY
Right thinking is your best light in this dark universe; it is your best hope in your worst hopeless...
MEHMET MURAT ILDAN
She filed the image away as an excellent and insulting question to ask the earl at an utterly inappr...
GAIL CARRIGER
If you die you're completely happy and your soul somewhere lives on. I'm not afraid of dying...
KURT COBAIN
Be committed & give your best .There is nothing like unimportant or a work of low dignity. If opport...
DR ANIL KUMAR SINHA
For anybody who thought I lost a step, I hope I showed them.
DERRICK BROOKS
I'm trying my best to keep my private life guarded. It's not easy at all. Non, non, non.
EMMANUELLE BEART
So many people have asked me about getting their own LEGO Oscar that I submitted it to LEGO Ideas so...
NATHAN SAWAYA
If you are going to walk on thin ice, you might as well dance! -Anonymous.
ANONYMOUS
What I like about non-fiction is that it covers such a huge territory. The best non-fiction is also ...
TRACY KIDDER
All you can do is to do your best.
CHARLOTTE DUJARDIN
I don't whats better gettin laid or gettin paid.
KANYE WEST
Jim, I hope someday you get a job on which you don't have to look at your watch all day.
SID VICIOUS
I hope you're at peace. I hope you... I hope you're in heaven, and you fell in love with someone who...
ROBERT KIRKMAN
When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.
GEORGE CARLIN
An insult is mean or unkind. Milton Berle called me the Sultan of Insult, and I was called the King ...
DON RICKLES
If you can see your path laid outin front of you step by step, you knowit's not your path. Your own ...
JOSEPH CAMPBELL
Self-respect can be a extension of your ego or a priceless virtue. -Anonymous.
ANONYMOUS
I hope for the best, it's great to be nominated even once in your life.
CHRISTINA AGUILERA
Just because your trained for something doesn't mean your prepared for it. -Anonymous.
ANONYMOUS
I hope you will no longer accuse me of a lack of delicacy. as I now count on your understanding.
GUSTAV MAHLER
Having hope and desire, makes anything possible. Do not just think about it, take action, and never ...
RICK PRICE
Alas, why gnaw you so your nether lip? Some bloody passion shakes your very frame. These are p...
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
If your life is shit then that because you step on it.
J C A ROWE
Resolve to make each day the very best and don't let anyone get in your way. If they do, step on the...
IVAN BENSON
I don't know whats better gettin laid or gettin paid.
KANYE WEST
If you can see your path laid out in front of you step by step, you know it's not your path. Your ow...
JOSEPH CAMPBELL
The disease has been devastating for so many. Raising false hope would add insult to injury.
DAVID HO
Intent not followed by action is an insult to your design. Decide what you want, create a plan, and ...
STEVE MARABOLI
I will never claim to know what you are thinking. I only hope I am on your mind.
AMANDA MOSHER
I'm very, very used to feeling anonymous, you know?
DAVID HAREWOOD
Whats the point in being grown up when you cant act childish sometimes?
NATALIE REPINSKI
I hope you feel better about yourself. I hope you feel alive. I hope that good things happen to you,...
STEPH BOWE
I think the biggest insult, the worst way you can offend a Mexican, is to insult their mother. A mot...
EMILIANO SALINAS
I guess we put ourselves out there hoping for the best, hoping that the person you say your vows to ...
TARYN LEIGH
Self-delusion is pulling in your stomach when you step on the scales.
PAUL SWEENEY
Self-delusion is pulling in your stomach when you step on the scales
PAUL SWEENEY
I'm an avid reader. Novels, non-fiction, comics, it doesn't matter. Best way in the world to...
REID SCOTT
The single best thing about coming out of the closet is that nobody can insult you by telling you wh...
RACHEL MADDOW
There have been huge Muslim demonstrations against cartoons depicting Muhammad and any other perceiv...
DENNIS PRAGER
He's the kind of player who we don't have anyone to guard him. With what he does, at his size.... He...
RICK BYRD
Many creative people are finding that creativity doesn't grow in abundance, it grows from scarci...
JORGEN VIG KNUDSTORP
If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a non...
DOUGLAS ADAMS
I briefly considered doing Edgar Allan Poe and just swearing a lot.
ANDY RICHTER
Sure, some journalists use anonymous sources just because they're lazy and I think editors ought...
BEN BRADLEE
I Believe she thought I had forgotten my station; and yours, sir.'

'Station! Station!-- y...
CHARLOTTE BRONTë
I have a huge Lego collection - I have a really big Lego collection. We're talking pretty darn l...
CALLAN MCAULIFFE
Sometimes in life, you may take a step, only to realize the steps you missed. Sometimes in life, you...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH
It's gentle humor. You don't have to worry about any swearing.
KATE LOWDER
The swearing of Turner, a man of immense frame and muscular power, during our evening's conversation...
JOHN TURNER
I don't think you can ever do your best. Doing your best is a process of trying to do your best.
TOWNES VAN ZANDT
If you can read this, thank a teacher. -Anonymous teacher.
ANONYMOUS TEACHER
You don't have to disrespect and insult others simply to hold your own ground. If you do, that shows...
RED HAIRCROW
Well when you cant sleep well you cant dream and when you cant dream well whats life mean
HOLLYWOOD UNDEAD
I hope your heart feels better. 
I hope your mind is set right.
I hope your love is conne...
SHAILEE J-N
I enjoyed being anonymous.
SACHA BARON COHEN
If you die you're completely happy and your soul somewhere lives on. I'm not afraid of dying. Total ...
KURT COBAIN
If you die you’re completely happy and your soul somewhere lives on. I’m not afraid of dying. To...
KURT COBAIN

More Anonymous

Animals are human just like us in a different shape and form so do not abuse them.
ANONYMOUS ANONYMOUS
You don't have to touch someone to love them, It's not in the kiss, It's in the times you don't kiss...
ANONYMOUS ANONYMOUS
Glory be to Him who changes others and remains Himself unchanged!
ANONYMOUS
Beloved, let us love one another, because love is from God; everyone one who loves is born of God an...
ANONYMOUS
May the God who gives endurance and encouragement
give you a spirit of unity among yourselves ...
ANONYMOUS
Some men are born with cold feet; some acquire cold feet; and some have cold feet thrust upon them.
ANONYMOUS
Epperson's law: When a man says it's a silly, childish game, it's probably something his wife can be...
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings.
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is like a box of chocolates. You have to squeeze a few bottoms to make sure you like what y...
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
ANONYMOUS
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man.
ANONYMOUS
He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.
ANONYMOUS
All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult.
ANONYMOUS
A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. "What do yo...
ANONYMOUS
A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
ANONYMOUS
Marital Freedom: The liberty that allows a husband to do exactly that which his wife pleases.
ANONYMOUS
Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...b...
ANONYMOUS
Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her o...
ANONYMOUS
Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's family d...
ANONYMOUS
The most expensive wedding usually ends with the quickest divorce.
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
ANONYMOUS
Leadership is the ability to hide your panic from others.
ANONYMOUS
An expert knows all the answers -- if you ask the right questions.
ANONYMOUS
Time cuts down all, Both great and small.
ANONYMOUS
Few cases of eyestrain have been developed by looking on the bright side of things.
ANONYMOUS
Be an optimist -- at least until they start moving animals in pairs to Cape Canaveral.
ANONYMOUS
Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell. •Anonymous Many an o...
ANONYMOUS
Some of the smallest situations are the biggest to some people.
ANONYMOUS
Man endures pain as an undeserved punishment; woman accepts it as a natural heritage.
ANONYMOUS
Defeat may test you; it need not stop you. If at first you don't succeed, try another way. For eve...
ANONYMOUS
Anarchy - it's not the law, it's just a good idea.
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.
ANONYMOUS
A friend is one to whom you can pour out the contents of your heart, chaff and grain alike. Knowin...
ANONYMOUS
Friendship is a living thing that lasts only as long as it is nourished with kindness, empathy and u...
ANONYMOUS
She is clothed in strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.
ANONYMOUS
many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. charm is deceptive, beauty is fleeting; but a ...
ANONYMOUS
Lady Wisdom will be your close friend; and Brother Knowledge will be your pleasant companion.
ANONYMOUS
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.
ANONYMOUS
It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is in the heart, not in the circumstances.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is possible only when one is busy. The body must toil, the mind must be occupied, and the ...
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is like jam. You can't spread even a little without getting some on yourself.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is the overcoming of not unknown obstacles toward a known goal.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness seems to be the result of something happening — inactivity is not very exhilarating.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is not pleasure, it's victory.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is the art of never holding in your mind the memory of any unpleasant thing that has passe...
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is not given but exchanged.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly possessions. It's a mental attitude. It comes f...
ANONYMOUS
If happiness could be brought, few of us could pay the price.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is like a butterfly. The more you chase it, the more it eludes you. But if you turn your a...
ANONYMOUS
So live that your memories will be part of your happiness.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness consists in activity; such as the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and ...
ANONYMOUS
Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness is not always measured in smiles.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness lies in our own backyard, but it's probably well hidden by crabgrass.
ANONYMOUS
Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.
ANONYMOUS
The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
ANONYMOUS
Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle ...
ANONYMOUS
Faith is like electricity. You can't see it, but you can see the light.
ANONYMOUS
To reprove small faults within due vehemence, is as absurd as if a man should take a great hammer to...
ANONYMOUS
My friend, why have you drifted so far away? All motion is relative, maybe it is you who have moved ...
ANONYMOUS
The happiest business in all the world is that of making friends, And no investment on the street pa...
ANONYMOUS
Flattery looks like friendship, just like a wolf looks like a dog.
ANONYMOUS
Remember that the faith that moves mountains always carries a pick.
ANONYMOUS
When you laugh, be sure to laugh at what people do and not at what people are.
ANONYMOUS
The sound of a kiss is much softer than that of a cannon - but it's echo lasts a great deal longer.
ANONYMOUS
Religion is like a blind man looking in a black room for a black cat that isn't there, and finding i...
ANONYMOUS
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
ANONYMOUS
When life throws a lemon at you, you throw it straight back at life and miss completely. That's my l...
ANONYMOUS
Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.
ANONYMOUS
Aging is a matter of mind. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
ANONYMOUS
I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, ...
ANONYMOUS
تبسمك في وجه أخيك صدقة، وأمرك بالمعروف صدقة ونهيك عن ال...
ANONYMOUS
The first men to be created and formed were called the Sorcerer of Fatal Laughter, the Sorcerer of N...
ANONYMOUS
Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you...
ANONYMOUS
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
ANONYMOUS
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for ...
ANONYMOUS
Anyone who is having troubles should pray. Anyone who is happy should sing praises. Anyone who is si...
ANONYMOUS
I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.
ANONYMOUS
Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us.
ANONYMOUS
Store front sign: Entire store on sale, everything $1 or more.
ANONYMOUS
If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives.
ANONYMOUS
Why didn't Bruce Willis play the lead role in Titanic? He would have saved everyone.
ANONYMOUS
I'm looking to buy a new boomerang, how can I throw the old one out?
ANONYMOUS
My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!
ANONYMOUS
If you can't find your better half, try finding your better two quarters.
ANONYMOUS
Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it.
ANONYMOUS
It's easy to stop smoking. I stopped smoking today with no problems. I also stopped yesterday too,...
ANONYMOUS
One day my wife's credit card got stolen.. what a relief it was to find that the thief spends less t...
ANONYMOUS
The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.
ANONYMOUS
In my house dirty dishes are like rabbits, they keep multiplying.
ANONYMOUS
How do you get a Kleenex to dance?
Put a little boogy in it!
ANONYMOUS
For you, I would swim across the ocean. LOL, just kidding, there are sharks in there.
ANONYMOUS
Why does Chuck Norris' calendar go directly from March 31 to April 2nd? Nobody fools Chuck Norris!
ANONYMOUS
I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.
ANONYMOUS
Stop the earth from spinning, I want to get off!
ANONYMOUS
If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter.
ANONYMOUS
The last thing that blew my mind was the wind.
ANONYMOUS
Why do you always see lightning first and hear the thunder later? Because your eyes are in front of...
ANONYMOUS
Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I ...
ANONYMOUS
Stupidity is far more fascinating than intelligence, after all intelligence has it's limits.
ANONYMOUS
Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on a beach drinking margaritas.
ANONYMOUS
My kitchen cleaner says "for a clean kitchen" so I can't use it, mine is dirty.
ANONYMOUS
Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
ANONYMOUS
Everything happening now happens because of everything that has happened before.
ANONYMOUS
When there's a will, I want to be in it.
ANONYMOUS
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
ANONYMOUS
When is the longer way always better than the shorter one? When you're a taxi driver.
ANONYMOUS
As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible.
ANONYMOUS
When the cop told me to give him my first name and last name I told him, 'Are you crazy? What's my ...
ANONYMOUS
Always be yourself, unless you can be a unicorn. Then always be a unicorn.
ANONYMOUS
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.
ANONYMOUS
I'm going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, I'm outstanding.
ANONYMOUS
Oh I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
ANONYMOUS
I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.
ANONYMOUS
Think you're smart? Come over and help me with my homework.
ANONYMOUS
Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it.
ANONYMOUS
Newspaper Ad: Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!!
ANONYMOUS
I bet you anything that I can stop gambling right now.
ANONYMOUS
My doctor prescribed laughter as the most efficient medicine. Unfortunately the pharmacist said too ...
ANONYMOUS
Finding a treasure is like working on algebra equations, all you have to do is find the X.
ANONYMOUS
I'm trying to think how I can think of what I want to think.
ANONYMOUS
People think.....
I'm skinny, but I'm really chunky.
I'm cheap, but I'm really thrifty. ANONYMOUS
I looked into my wallet and it was empty, I looked through all my pockets and they were all empty. T...
ANONYMOUS
I lost control. Offering reward to anyone who finds it.
ANONYMOUS
Chuck Norris is so amazing he can:

Light ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.<...
ANONYMOUS
Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time a...
ANONYMOUS
He grabbed her hand and held it tightly, and she thought, "he loves me!" And he thought, "wow this ...
ANONYMOUS
I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition.
ANONYMOUS
I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.
ANONYMOUS
Stop! You're under arrest for being too sexy. Your sentence is an eternity inside my heart.
ANONYMOUS
Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurrasic Park.
ANONYMOUS
It's 11PM, do you know where your pants are?
ANONYMOUS
Son, employees are like mules. Some you stand in front of and coax them along with a carrot. Some yo...
ANONYMOUS
Don't believe everything fortune cookies tells you. Just because they're sweet doesn't mean they're...
ANONYMOUS
Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!
ANONYMOUS
I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake.
ANONYMOUS
How do I like my eggs? In a cake.
ANONYMOUS
My grandpa's car is so old; when he parked in front of a museum, they towed his car inside the museu...
ANONYMOUS
Birthdays are nature's way of feeding us cake.
ANONYMOUS
What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?
ANONYMOUS
I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.
ANONYMOUS
There was a robot invented in China that catches thieves. In Australia it caught 10 thieves, in Ame...
ANONYMOUS
I'm a Victoria's Secret model. It's such a secret, not even Victoria knows.
ANONYMOUS
How is a poor man a lot like a rich man? They both have an iPhone.
ANONYMOUS
Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong.
ANONYMOUS
Smile while you still have teeth.
ANONYMOUS
Have some patience, I'm screwing things up as fast as possible.
ANONYMOUS
After many years of studying my Geography book I finally know by heart that Australia is on page 23.
ANONYMOUS
Funny sign at health spa: Fresh 10,000 year old mud for sale.
ANONYMOUS
I always mean what I say, I don't always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.
ANONYMOUS
I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable.
ANONYMOUS
True love is truly amazing only when it's truly true.
ANONYMOUS
Being married means mostly shouting "What?" from other rooms.
ANONYMOUS
Is it good if a blow dryer blows?
ANONYMOUS
Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
ANONYMOUS
Never test how deep the water is with both feet.
ANONYMOUS
Never judge a book by it's movie
ANONYMOUS
I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side, my legs for always supporting me, and my ...
ANONYMOUS
When you have a hammer in your hand everything around you starts looking like a nail.
ANONYMOUS
Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring so I go back to being myself.
ANONYMOUS
If you didn't see it with your own eyes, or hear it with your own ears, don't invent it with your sm...
ANONYMOUS
My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do.
ANONYMOUS
I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better.
ANONYMOUS
Officer: I had a feeling I'd catch someone speeding here. Driver: I know, that's why I came as fast...
ANONYMOUS
I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close ...
ANONYMOUS
Today I saw something through a store window that was truly stunning, beautiful and sexy. I wanted ...
ANONYMOUS
Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon.
ANONYMOUS
Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.
ANONYMOUS
I'm not really a control freak, but... can I show the right way to do that?
ANONYMOUS
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
ANONYMOUS
I once finished first on my running team, then the coach asked me where everyone else is.
ANONYMOUS
Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.
ANONYMOUS
Why is the sky blue? Sure there is an explanation, but lets just be thankful it's not red!
ANONYMOUS
Just because I can't sing doesn't mean that I won't sing.
ANONYMOUS
Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place... the fridge.
ANONYMOUS
I'm not frowning, I'm just smiling upside down.
ANONYMOUS
The only problem with golf is that the slow people are always in front of you and the fast people al...
ANONYMOUS
I can make the doorbell ring any time I want, all I have to do is go to the bathroom.
ANONYMOUS
The amount of time it takes for a minute to go by is proportionally dependent with the distance to t...
ANONYMOUS
Bathroom sign above toilet: It's like basketball, the basket is bigger than the ball! Learn to sco...
ANONYMOUS
I can't wait for that to never happen.
ANONYMOUS
I liked the movie Titanic, my favorite character was the iceberg.
ANONYMOUS
Sports top moment: to score a goal but miss in the re-play.
ANONYMOUS
Honesty top moment: to be a cop and give yourself a ticket for going through a red light.
ANONYMOUS
Rudeness top moment: to scare an ostrich on an asphalt street.
ANONYMOUS
I'm so sorry about what I said when I was hungry.
ANONYMOUS
Always be positive. *Trips down the stairs* Whew, I got down those stairs fast.
ANONYMOUS
Beauty is mysterious as well as terrible.
ANONYMOUS
An expert is a person who has made every possible mistake in a small field of study.
ANONYMOUS
My taste in music ranges from "You've gotta listen to this" to "I know, please don't judge me."
ANONYMOUS
Just because it's called makeup, it doesn't mean it should make up 100% of your face.
ANONYMOUS
You can't please everyone, you're not a Nutella jar.
ANONYMOUS
Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.
ANONYMOUS
It's better to shut up and give the impression that you're stupid than to say something and erase al...
ANONYMOUS
If we ever travel far in the universe to another planet with intelligent life, let's just make patte...
ANONYMOUS
Whenever you feel stupid, remember that there are people outside searching for Pokemon.
ANONYMOUS