What's the matter?" you asked, seizing an idea. "Did I burst your balloon - destroy the fantasy?"

I struggled for a way to answer this without my clothes.

... Well his was very cruel, but loving you'd become a full-time job and I wasn't ready to be unemployed.

S: But Chris, I think his embarrassment isn't in relation to you or me but to himself. What can he do?
C: I hate being thrown into such a physical state.
S: Isn't that experiencing life to the hilt?
C: No, it's just a dumb infatuation. I'm so ashamed.
S: But even if his silence hurts you, isn't that what attracted you to him? The fact that he was inaccessible. So, I think there is a contradiction there, at least nothing to feel ashamed of -.

Cause shame was what we always felt, me and all my girlfriends, for expecting sex to breed complicity. ("Complicity is like a girl's name," writes Dodie Bellamy).

I loved you at your worst, and you were always at your worst. Nothing could stop me. Not even you.

Making someone feel obligated, pressured or forced into doing something of a sexual nature that they don't want to is sexual coercion. This includes persistent attempts at sexual contact when the person has already refused you. Nobody owes you sex, ever; and no means no, always.

I was about thirteen when I started letting boys feel me up.