What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.'

If you're a fish swimming against the current, you will soon be electrocuted.

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have thick fingers.

Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Kuwait.

If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?

Three monkeys escaped from the zoo, one was caught watching TV, the other playing hockey, and the third one was caught reading this quote!