We live in what virtually amounts to a museum -- which does not happen to a lot of people.

I don't think a prostitute is more moral than a wife, but they are doing the same thing.

When a man opens the car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.

When a man opens the car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.

All money nowadays seems to be produced with a natural homing instinct for the Treasury.

The biggest waste of water in the country is when you spend half a pint and flush two gallons.